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Vera

Vera

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DISCLAIMER: I don't recommend this for everyone, but when it comes to buttfaces making rude remarks, normally I'll roll with it and sometimes troll them harder. Not enough for me to be a bully, but enough to make them back down because my wit is sharper than theirs (because they're taken by surprise), and especially because I put a spin on their insults to me or sometimes even exaggerate them.

Being unexpected yourself will make the instigators feel like they're no longer in control. As long as they're the crazy ones/the ones unbound by social expectations to be respectful, they're the ones making everyone else uncomfortable and they're the only ones that can control themselves, which makes them in power.

I don't have any examples of myself doing this, but the conversation in the below tweet is the gist of what I'm talking about--rolling with it:
https://twitter.com/Twillow_RS/status/713856016417439745
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05-Jun-2016 13:23:26

Vera

Vera

Posts: 16,334 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Also, at least for me, putting someone on ignore is the last thing I'd do (unless I've just reported them for spamming me with website advertisements because who cares about them) because you have no idea what they might be saying about you in public, and you can't damage control.

I highly suggest ignoring them, yes, and not giving them the satisfaction of your responding to them, nor give them anything to respond to (I know this contradicts my above post, but it's a case by case basis and it also really depends on your mood haha :P ), but I don't suggest putting them on ignore.
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05-Jun-2016 13:27:17

Vera

Vera

Posts: 16,334 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Salcos said :
"Shit clan"
"This clan is shit"
"Kill yourself"
"People in this clan suck"
"This clan is a scamming clan"
"They are all hackers!" Here are some things I might respond with, btw, though there are some I wouldn't have a smart alecky response to. They're super cheesy but honestly most people feel uncomfortable when you go really hard with such cheese and really put your all in cheesy jokes. It makes them uncomfortable. Lol.

"This clan is shit" - Fo shizzle! We da shit@@@@@@@ bruuhhhhhhhhh
"Kill yourself" - Spot me 500k pls because reclaiming items from Death is expensive and I'm cheap af ;_;
"People in this clan suck" - At least we get action ;D / We give out jolly ranchers to those who cap
"This clan is a scamming clan" - Yes, agreed; even right now in this very moment we are being scammed by a troll who said they'd be our friend and hold our hands when we went to the bathroom, but instead he's being a meanie poo poo head and won't give all of us our goodnight kissies. Boo boo, pls stop scamming us, u hart breaker u :'(
"They are all hackers!" - Omg!!!! We are???? Do I get to type code at 9238749234 words per minute and wear Neo glasses from The Matrix?!?! Hnnnnnng *_* w8 w8 w8 bruh when did we become hackers :O :O

Seriously just go HAM with your responses and it might unsettle your bullies. For cases where you can't come up with a cheesy response, just tell them "Hey boy how you doing ;) ;o ;o" and just shower them with looooove. There's a cheeky parody that goes, "Love your enemies, it makes them confused" and it works lol. Makes them a bit terrified, even.

However, I've noticed the only time this doesn't work is when you yourself are the target and you've been affected. It's really hard to take on this flippant attitude that invalidates a bully's zing when you've already been emotionally/personally compromised. Much easier to defend others than it is yourself, at least for me.
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05-Jun-2016 13:36:12 - Last edited on 05-Jun-2016 13:38:54 by Vera

Esploratore
Apr Member 2006

Esploratore

Posts: 1,675 Mithril Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
In general, I prefer to not respond to the horrible remarks some can make but not actually put them on ignore. If I see something said that really crosses the line ('I hate you. I'm gonna come and kill you and your family.'), I'll report it. Fortunately, the trolls haven't been much of a problem since my Soul Wars days. That became a really toxic environment. More than once, I was threatened and had some wishing I was dead. Back then, I wondered how some of the players got away with some of the vile things they said.

Someone saying your clan stinks is one thing. Just ignore it. But no one should be subjected to threats in a game.

If some of the worst repeat offenders are being allowed to continue bullying with no real consequences, that's a problem. Given a choice between aggressive enforcement of game cheaters vs cyber bullies, I'd hope priority would be given to the latter.

05-Jun-2016 17:18:34

Scret
Mar Member 2018

Scret

Posts: 25,434 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Vera said :
DISCLAIMER: I don't recommend this for everyone, but when it comes to buttfaces making rude remarks, normally I'll roll with it and sometimes troll them harder. Not enough for me to be a bully, but enough to make them back down because my wit is sharper than theirs (because they're taken by surprise), and especially because I put a spin on their insults to me or sometimes even exaggerate them.

Being unexpected yourself will make the instigators feel like they're no longer in control. As long as they're the crazy ones/the ones unbound by social expectations to be respectful, they're the ones making everyone else uncomfortable and they're the only ones that can control themselves, which makes them in power.

I don't have any examples of myself doing this, but the conversation in the below tweet is the gist of what I'm talking about--rolling with it:
https://twitter.com/Twillow_RS/status/713856016417439745

You cant outwit the witless
`*•.¸(*•.¸(`*•.¸+¸.•*´)¸.•*)¸.•*´
+«´¨`•°
SKILL SCHOOL
•´¨`»+
. .•*(¸.•*´(¸.•*´+`*•.¸)`*•.¸)*•.

05-Jun-2016 17:46:57

Lumine

Lumine

Posts: 15,239 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Does having people say stuff about your clan in public actually deter anyone from joining?

If I see anyone doing that, I form a negative opinion of the person saying it, not of the person or clan they're saying it about.

I'm not sure you even need anyone as a new clan member who's so gullible as to believe that what a blatant harasser says is the truth.
Lumine
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06-Jun-2016 01:24:07

Salcos

Salcos

Posts: 866 Gold Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Lumine said :
Does having people say stuff about your clan in public actually deter anyone from joining?

If I see anyone doing that, I form a negative opinion of the person saying it, not of the person or clan they're saying it about.

I'm not sure you even need anyone as a new clan member who's so gullible as to believe that what a blatant harasser says is the truth.

One person, who cares? But what if 10...15...or even 20+ people are telling you?
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06-Jun-2016 02:11:36

Blasty
Feb Member 2017

Blasty

Posts: 9,319 Rune Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Salcos said :
One person, who cares? But what if 10...15...or even 20+ people are telling you?

I think the situation you're describing is different to the ones most of us are familiar with.

You might want to look into the reasons that people are complaining. In the less organised/targeted attacks that I think most of us have in mind, the motivation for being disruptive is usually something small like the placement of a vex or recruiting in public chat. These motivations aren't strong enough for people to do much more than make a negative comment in public chat. In these cases, it might be enough to show humour or a lack of interest to put them off.

When you have as many as 20 people who seem motivated enough to make targeted attacks towards your clan, you might want to find out why they are doing that.

If you're asking about a general solution to that problem, I think the problem is too broad for a simple solution that would work all the time.

To improve a specific instance of that problem, it will probably take some more background information and a better understanding of why people are being disruptive.

On the topic of bad publicity and removing clan mates, here are some relevant articles:
http://technori.com/2013/07/4516-the-9-golden-rules-for-dealing-with-bad-publicity/
https://hbr.org/2012/07/are-you-creating-disgruntled-e
http://www.thefreelibrary.com/Avoid+a+sticky+situation%3A+a+guide+to+firing+an+employee.-a0161130537
Blasty
// @BlastytheBlue // Blasty#5167
| Co-owner of Mine Nation

06-Jun-2016 04:58:06

Scret
Mar Member 2018

Scret

Posts: 25,434 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Blasty said :
Salcos said :
One person, who cares? But what if 10...15...or even 20+ people are telling you?

I think the situation you're describing is different to the ones most of us are familiar with.

You might want to look into the reasons that people are complaining. In the less organised/targeted attacks that I think most of us have in mind, the motivation for being disruptive is usually something small like the placement of a vex or recruiting in public chat. These motivations aren't strong enough for people to do much more than make a negative comment in public chat. In these cases, it might be enough to show humour or a lack of interest to put them off.

When you have as many as 20 people who seem motivated enough to make targeted attacks towards your clan, you might want to find out why they are doing that.

If you're asking about a general solution to that problem, I think the problem is too broad for a simple solution that would work all the time.

To improve a specific instance of that problem, it will probably take some more background information and a better understanding of why people are being disruptive.

On the topic of bad publicity and removing clan mates, here are some relevant articles:
http://technori.com/2013/07/4516-the-9-golden-rules-for-dealing-with-bad-publicity/
https://hbr.org/2012/07/are-you-creating-disgruntled-e
http://www.thefreelibrary.com/Avoid+a+sticky+situation%3A+a+guide+to+firing+an+employee.-a0161130537

Why people are doing it? because they are ass holes, nothing more beyond that.
`*•.¸(*•.¸(`*•.¸+¸.•*´)¸.•*)¸.•*´
+«´¨`•°
SKILL SCHOOL
•´¨`»+
. .•*(¸.•*´(¸.•*´+`*•.¸)`*•.¸)*•.

06-Jun-2016 10:03:13

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