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Nead
Sep Member 2012

Nead

Posts: 20,472 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.


A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says ''Sorry we don't serve food in here''.


There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.


:P
- Ornery Onions -
Prioritizing inclusion, friendliness and offering a helping hand to those that need it.

30-Nov-2014 05:43:59

Apazos

Apazos

Posts: 3,054 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Since it's getting ever closer to the holidays I thought some Xmas puns would be appropriate :)
----------------


How did Scrooge win the football game?
The ghost of Christmas passed.

Why wasn't the turkey hungry at Christmas dinner?
Because he was stuffed.

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa?
Claustrophobic! :P

You better get spruced up if you're going to sell Christmas trees
~Apa

01-Dec-2014 08:24:31

VVinh

VVinh

Posts: 7,372 Rune Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
A little funny story:

Human 1 and his friend Human 2 are walking together.
They are both men.
Later on, a man and a woman walked past them.
Human 1 turned his head back and looked on the woman's back and said: ''what a butt''! And Human 2 said: ''Yes, of course! He is a bodybuilder''. I'm gaÿ.

02-Dec-2014 20:21:06

Gertjan

Gertjan

Posts: 1,724 Mithril Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Apazos said :
Silly groaner I heard from awhile back & found again on the interwebs :)

The Island of the Trids
There once was an island where a group of people called Trids made their home. In the middle of the island stood a mountain, towering over the village of the Trids. On this mountain lived an ogre, who did not allow the Trids on his mountain. When a Trid would dare to climb the summit of the mountain, the ogre would kick them straight back down. Eventually over time, the Trids multiplied until the whole island except for the mountain was covered by them & spent their days dreaming of occupying the space on top of the ever visible mountain. Every few days, another Trid would be seen making the climb up the mountain, only to be seen again later on tumbling back down because of the ogre kicking them.

One day, a travelling Rabbi came to the island of the Trids. Despite being so overcrowded, the Trids were extremely generous to him. The Rabbi decided to return the favor by going up to the mountain and plead the Trid's case to the ogre. The Trids were pleading him not to go, warning him of being kicked back down the mountain. The stubborn Rabbi went anyways, and after a long trek up the mountain he confronted the ogre and asked "Why have you allowed me to climb up the mountain without kicking me back down?"
The ogre simply replied "Silly Rabbi, kicks are for Trids!"

Oh my god. I love this!!

04-Dec-2014 11:08:59

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