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Chapter 23: Bono Raises Summoning
At Bono's POH...
Bono: That was a good rest!
(Thorblade4 looks tired)
Thorblade4: Hang on. I'll be right back. Don't leave this POH until I come back.
(Thorblade4 leaves Bono's POH)
The Next Day...
Thorblade4: I'm back!
Rocky: What took you so long?
Puss: It has been 24 hours exactly!
Bono: I made popcorn!
Thorblade4: I've been sleeping for the last 23 hours, 59 minutes and 0 seconds.
Rocky: ...
Puss: ...
Blue: ...
Bono: ...
Thorblade4: What?!
Outside of Bono's House...
Rocky: So Thorblade4, what should we do today?
Puss: Use Evi1 Mag3 as a scratching post?
Blue: Find out what the Wise Old Man is up to?
Bono: Start world peace?
(Everyone looks at Bono)
Bono: What?
Thorblade4: Nope. Nope. And nope.
Rocky: Then what are we doing?
Thorblade4: Bono's going to raise summoning!
Puss: Why is everything we do focused around Bono?!
Thorblade4: Because Bono is the star of our show.
Blue: Why can't we do something that doesn't involve Bono?
Thorblade4: Because our readers want to see Bono.
Readers: 2 4 6 8! Who do we appreciate? Bono! Bono! GOOOOOOO BONO!!!
Thorblade4: See?
(Rocky, Puss and Blue grumble)
At Pikkupst*x's House...
Pikkupst*x: Help! There's a rabbit-thing upstairs in my room!
Bono: I love rabbits! They're like bunnies!
(Bono runs upstairs)
Thorblade4: You forgot to tell him it's not a rabbit it's a wolpertinger.
(There is sound of fighting from upstairs)
Thorblade4: BONO!!! NO!!!
(Bono walks downstairs looking beaten up)
Bono: Pikkupst*x, you lied! There isn't a rabbit up there! The weird wolf thing must have ate it! Poor little rabbit...
Thorblade4:
Rocky:
Puss:
Blue:
Pikkupst*x:
Bono: What?
Pikkupst*x: I think I know how you can get rid of the wolpertinger.
Bono: Why can't you do it? "While Guthix Sleeps, the World Wakes to the Fate of the Gods and the Children of Mah in Sliske's Endgame..."

13-May-2009 23:56:11

Pikkupst*x: Because someone has to make sure it doesn't bring more of it's kind using the obelisk downstairs.
Rocky: You're just scared of fighting it.
Pikkupst*x: Who told you tha-. I mean that's not true.
Puss: Whatever.
Pikkupst*x: Anyway, I sent my apprentice, What's-His-Face to gather 2 wolf bones, but he hasn't shown up. I need you to gather some wolf bones.
Bono: Ok!
(Bono runs off to White Wolf Mountain)
Thorblade4: Bono! Get back here!
(Thorblade4 runs after Bono)
At White Wolf Mountain...
(Bono finds Stikklebrix)
Bono: That must be What's-his-face, Pick-up-sticks apprentice.
(Bono walks up to a White Wolf)
Bono: Excuse me Mr. White Wolf. I need your bones. This will only take a second.
White Wolf: Growl!
(White Wolf jumps on Bono)
Bono: Hey! That hurt! Bad dog! Cut out it!
(White Wolf tears up Bono's inventory and destroys all the cheese)
Bono: That's it!!! You've gone too far! You can growl at me and attack me, but destroying my cheese?!?! That's a whole 'nother level!!!
(Bono casts an unknown spell and destroys the White Wolf and another one)
Thorblade4:
Rocky:
Puss:
Blue:
Bono: Now to head to Pikkupst*x's House.
At Pikkupst*x's House...
Bono: Ok. I've got the scroll and the pouch ready. Now to get the wolf thing.
(Wolpertinger turns around)
Wolpertinger: Roar!
Bono: Eek! It's the freak!
Wolpertinger: Roar! =@
(Wolpertinger attacks and the Spirit Wolf appears)
Spirit Wolf: Roar!
(Spirit Wolf uses howl and blows the Wolpertinger away)
Thorblade4: Bono did it!
Rocky: Yeah, but I think the spirit wolf also blew Bono away. See him flying way over there?
Thorblade4: We'd better go get him.
An Hour of Chasing Bono Later...
(Bono receives loads of Gold Charms and Summoning Xp)
Bono: Ladies and Gentlemen, I introduce our new party member: Spirit Wolf!
Spirit Wolf: Woof!
Puss: "While Guthix Sleeps, the World Wakes to the Fate of the Gods and the Children of Mah in Sliske's Endgame..."

13-May-2009 23:56:29

13-May-2009 23:56:47

13-May-2009 23:57:25

Puss: Gasp! You're right!
(This is getting a bit boring, so I'm taking the story to the Varrock Library)
Varrock Library...
Reldo: Gasp! Not you again!
Bono: Now NPC's are saying "Gasp! Not you again"
Thorblade4: I bet you're feeling "deja vu" right?
Bono: I guess.
(Surok Magis walks up to the party)
Surok: Hi I'm Surok! I'm a wizard who's not evil and trying to take over all of Misthalin and is trapped in the library by the VSPG.
Bono: Ok! Rat sent this.
(Surok takes the letter)
Surok: (mumbles)...Hmmmm...(mumbles)...What?! This is outrageous! Anyway Bono, I need you to gather the following materials and take them to the Chaos Alter though a secret enterance through the Saradomin Statue outside of Varrock. If you do, gold will rain from the sky.
Bono: I don't like gold.
Thorblade4:
Rocky:
Puss:
Blue:
Surok:
Bono: What?
Surok: I meant it also makes cheese rain from the sky.
Bono: Hot diggety! I'll do it!
A Few minutes later...
Bono: Here's all the stuff you need.
Surok: Thank you Bono. Now I will make it rain cheese from the sky and I'm not really lying to you and going to brainwash King Roald, which I'm not going to do.
Bono: Why do you talk like that?
Surok: It's just how I talk.
Bono: Ok!
Crossroad Near Varrock...
Bono: We gave the letter to Surok and we gave him supplies to make it rain gold.
Rat: Oh no! He's really brainwashing King Roald.
Bono: Oh. Rats!
Rat: Yes?
Bono: Never mind...
Rat: Talk to Zaff then arrest him.
At the Varrock Library...
Bono: Surok, you're under arrest for lying to the main character of the story (which is me) and an illegal attempt to brainwash King Roald.
Surok: Why don't you see if King Roald is brainwashed? He's just outside.
Bono: I will!
(Bono opens the door and King Roald hits him and Bono flies across the room)
Surok: Go King Roald! Destroy the noob!
(Bono starts throwing books at King Roald and Reldo walks in) "While Guthix Sleeps, the World Wakes to the Fate of the Gods and the Children of Mah in Sliske's Endgame..."

13-May-2009 23:57:50

Reldo: Stop throwing books! It's destroying them! And don't hurt the king!
Bono: He's brainwashed! I'm doing this in self-defence!
(King Roald runs out of HP)
Thorblade4: Now Bono! Use the Beacon Ring!
Bono: Ok!
(Bono throws the ring at King Roald)
Thorblade4:
Rocky:
Puss:
Blue:
(Zaff appears)
Zaff:
Bono: What?
Zaff: You are not under the spell no more, King Roald. And you Surok can't escape the library! I teleblocked you!
Surok: Fudge...
Zaff: Thanks again you 5.
(Zaff disappears)
Near the Sawmill...
Bono: I did it! I completed What Lies Below!
Thorblade4: Nice job Bono!
(Surok clears his throat and everybody looks at him)
Bono: Surok! How'd you get out of the Library.
Surok: It was simple. I said things like I'm the wall. When I got out of Varrock, I said I was a tree.
(Flashback beings)
Surok: I'm a tree!
(W00dcutt3r walks up to Surok)
W00dcutt3r: That's the strangest tree I ever saw. I wanna chop it down!
Surok: I'm an ent!
W00dcutt3r: Fudge, I don't wanna damage my axe.
(W00dcutt3r walks away)
Surok: Anyway, nah nah nah nah nah!
(Surok goes down the tunnel)
Thorblade4: After him!
Fire Giant Chamber...
(Surok destroys two Fire Giants)
Zombie and Skeleton Chamber...
Surok: Go my two Big Wolves!
(Surok summons 2=two Big Wolves and escapes)
Bono: Nice doggie!
(Big Wolf growls at Bono. Puss does a flip over Bono)
Puss: You have insulted my noobish friend's honor! You must pay for it!
(The two Big Wolves run away. All the skeletons and zombies back up against the wall)
Bork Chamber...
Surok: Darn it noob! How'd you find me?!
Bono: You're very good at leaving footprints.
Surok: Darn it! Well face the wrath of Bork the Orc!
(Bork appears)
Bono: OMG! 276!!! I can't fight that!
Surok: Go my Ork! Destroy them!
An Hour of Dogding and Attacking later... "While Guthix Sleeps, the World Wakes to the Fate of the Gods and the Children of Mah in Sliske's Endgame..."

13-May-2009 23:58:31

13-May-2009 23:59:07

14-May-2009 00:01:47

14-May-2009 00:02:02

Behind the Ice Cream Booth...
Evi1 Mag3: Now Surok, we shall finish off our enemies. And who are our enemies?
Surok: The squirrels?
Evi1 Mag3: No...
Surok: The credit card company?
Evi1 Mag3: No...
Surok: The laud-
Evi1 Mage3: NO!!! It's Thorblade4 and his friends!
Surok: Oh.
Ev1l Mag3: We shall finish them off using Death by Chocolates...
(Evi1 Mag3 walks up to Rokuh)
Ev1l Mag3: Excuse me. My friends over there would like death by chocolates.
Rokuh: Ok!
(Rokuh fires death by chocolates and Bono and the others)
Thorblade4: Duck!
Bono: Where?
(Thorblade4 pulls Bono under before he is hit)
Rocky: Fudge. Evi1 Mag3 and Surok are back.
Thorblade4: They are firing death by chocolates at us!
Rocky: Quick! Throw some ice cream into the cannon!
Bono: Why-?
Rocky: Just do it!
(Bono throws ice cream into the cannon. The cannon explodes and Evi1 Mage and Surok fly away)
Surok: Nice plan genius...
Ev1l Mag3: Shut up!
Puss: Another plan created by loonies foiled again by us!
Bono: Yeah...
Thorblade4: What's wrong Bono?
Bono: I lost my ice cream!
Thorblade4: ...
Rocky: ...
Puss: ...
Blue: ...
Thorblade4: I'll just buy you another one.
Bono: Ok!
(Thorblade brings Bono another scoop of cheesecake and trips and it lands right in Bonos face)
Thorblade4: Oh man! I'm so sorry Bono!
Bono: Why are you sorry? This is great! I can eat my ice cream on the go!=)
Thorblade4:
Rocky:
Puss:
Blue:
Next Chapter: Chapter 26: Stronghold of Player Safety "While Guthix Sleeps, the World Wakes to the Fate of the Gods and the Children of Mah in Sliske's Endgame..."

14-May-2009 00:02:16