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The Adventures of Corugi

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Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Posts: 10,908 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
It's not easy, becoming a Holy Emperor, Prophet and Saint. And you can't achieve it all in a day either. You need patience, willpower and determination! And an amazing intellect might be helpful as well when aiming for greatness.
And even with all the skills and knowledge not everyone can become an Emperor just like that. Actually I believe only one person could ever make it to the top, and still be sane enough to enjoy it when he got there.
Me? I am just a storyteller. I am here to tell the tale of the Great and Mighty Corugi, Lord and Ruler of All.

09-Feb-2011 10:42:09 - Last edited on 09-Feb-2011 10:42:52 by Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Posts: 10,908 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
I do not know when or where the Holy Emperor was born. I am not even sure if he was brought onto this world in such a common way, it does not suit him. But I do know one of his first great acts of heroic justice was done in the small farmer's town called Lumbridge.
It was a chilly spring morning, the nightly rains had left their mark on the locals, and on farmer Fred. Fred was not the brightest of people, nor was he the greatest of farmers. In his lazy ways, he had forgot to use compost on the soil of his little vegetable patch behind his house before planting onions. Pathetic.
“Behold!” A heroic voice called out from outside Fred's door. “Dead onions! This is a serious offence, and the price for serious offences... Is high.”
Confused by the sudden shouting, Fred opened the back door and poked his head out to try and locate the source.
In the middle of his vegetable patch stood a young man, dressed in dull browns and greys. A hood protecting him from the rain hid some of his features. But even though his clothing was common, there was something different about the man. An commanding aura glittered around him, his eyes peeking out from under the hood forced obedience, his posture demanded respect.
Here stood a man destined for greatness, destined to be Someone! Of course Fred, who was about as bright as a wet candle, didn't see any of this.
“Oi! What ye doin' in me veggies!” Fred shouted at the stranger, for he was trampling all over his freshly planted onions. “Get off me lawn!”
“Veggies?” The stranger turned around and glared at Fred who quickly cowered away. “You call these Veggies?” The young man crouched to examine a particularly weak looking onion. “This poor thing is almost dead! You call yourself a farmer? You will face the consequences of your laziness!”
The stranger got up and started to slowly approach Fred, who quickly slammed and locked the door in response.

09-Feb-2011 10:42:17 - Last edited on 09-Feb-2011 10:44:20 by Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Posts: 10,908 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
“A door won't stop Me, the Mighty Corugi,” he shouted and kicked the door as hard as he could. A loud snap was heard, and Corugi went pale.
“Okay, maybe a door will stop me,” he whispered to himself and he gently rubbed his injured knee. “Stop hiding behind magically reinforced doors!” He shouted at Fred again, giving the impenetrable barrier an evil glare.
Using his superior intellect, Corugi quickly came up with a plan to enter the fortress and avenge his knee on Fred. He picked all of the rotting onions from Fred's failed vegetable patch and threw them at the windows. The onions splattered to their doom. Slowly but surely, the rotting juices started to leak through small cracks in the sloppy woodwork around the glass.
“Ha-ha,” Corugi exclaimed as he watch his plan succeed. “Smelly, isn't it?” he shouted at the heavy oak door again. “I guess you will have to open the door to let some fresh air in, or your house might smell like rotting onions forever!”
“Yer an evil basterd ye are!” Fred cursed in defeat as he came out of the house. “Evil, but clever.”
“It was a good plan, wasn't it?” Corugi gloated. “Of course, only a genius like myself could have come up with something as creative as this. You are a lucky man, Fred. Lucky you met me.”
“I s'pose,” Fred mumbled and examined what was left of his vegetables. Pieces of squishy onion slowly dripped down the glass, instantly contaminating everything they touched with an impossible stink. “Ah, yes,“ Corugi added as he noticed the man's sad look. “I cleared your vegetable patch for you. An amazing, but well planned, side-effect of my genius plan!”
He smiled as he slapped the farmer on the back. “Now you can re-plant everything properly, the Corugi way! Here, let me show you.”

09-Feb-2011 10:42:23 - Last edited on 09-Feb-2011 10:45:03 by Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Posts: 10,908 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
The two men spent the rest of the afternoon, most of the evening, and a good half of the following week planting new onions. Fred's vegetable patch became famous throughout Lumbridge for being the most smelly, most impossible piece of dirt in all of Misthalin. Nothing would grow there, ever.
Fred's life had been changed forever. From all over the kingdom, people came to see, and smell, his infamous land. Artists drew and painted pictures of it, rich merchants tried to buy it, and women found Fred to be irresistibly smelly. Eventually Fred sold his land for a crate of tomatoes – which turned out to be rotten - to the Queen of Varrock, who tried to turn the unlucky vegetable patch into a flower garden.

09-Feb-2011 10:42:30 - Last edited on 09-Feb-2011 10:45:16 by Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Posts: 10,908 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
More adventures of the Great and Mighty Corugi will follow.
Chapter 2 - Corugi and the Vampire starts on page 2, post 6.
Chapter 3 - Corugi and the Pit of Doom starts on page 4, post 8.
Chapter 4 - Corugi and the Lost Treasure starts on page 6, post 3.

09-Feb-2011 10:42:36 - Last edited on 14-Mar-2011 09:45:01 by Kimzi Caky

Averia Light

Averia Light

Posts: 28,508 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Lol.
Corugi's EPIC tales shall never be forgotten!
He's cleverness with the onions and the attempt to re-grow has made Fred poorer than what he already was!
REVENGE FOR HIS KNEE!
Oh teach me the ways of he Empire. I am not worthy to feast my eyes upon such rich history. And I swear I'm not going to let her know all the pain I have known

09-Feb-2011 11:05:42

Kimzi Caky

Kimzi Caky

Posts: 10,908 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Soon I will tell the tale of the mighty Vampire Slayer Corugi!
His second act of greatness in the lands of RuneScape, that would eventually lead him to his destiny of becoming the Holy Corugian Emperor.
If only we all could be as great and mighty as he.

09-Feb-2011 12:25:14

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