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The Thief's Apprentice.
Quick find code: 49-50-56-59256619
No, don't publish it.. then it would be removed from these forums and I'd have to pay for it!
But seriously, this is better than some of the books I got in my bookcase. I think my fav bit so far would be..
“I'll see you soon ..... I promise.” he said as he not dared to look into her eyes. She stared at him, smiling then placed her hand on his face. “I'm not allowed to trust a thief remember? But look after yourself, I need someone to scream at from time to time.”
You're a real writer, keep posting please!
But seriously, this is better than some of the books I got in my bookcase. I think my fav bit so far would be..
“I'll see you soon ..... I promise.” he said as he not dared to look into her eyes. She stared at him, smiling then placed her hand on his face. “I'm not allowed to trust a thief remember? But look after yourself, I need someone to scream at from time to time.”
You're a real writer, keep posting please!
21-Aug-2009 01:08:15
Wow, Wind. Great job!
Though as Quiet said, just because I am a grammar freak..
There are some small grammatical errors, but those are fine.
Though since this story is a narrative and third-person, I'd suggest not using "I" or "You" while talking as the narrator.
Idk why, but it always made things look better.
Great story, all-in-all.
Though as Quiet said, just because I am a grammar freak..
There are some small grammatical errors, but those are fine.
Though since this story is a narrative and third-person, I'd suggest not using "I" or "You" while talking as the narrator.
Idk why, but it always made things look better.
Great story, all-in-all.
22-Aug-2009 02:48:58
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