RuneScape Forum Archive | The Kingnoob series

Sirapyro

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Chapter470 - The pre-final challenges 3

Blue: We can't beat somebody if we don't know who they are!
Survanet: That is the reason I am here.
Chuckie: The moment of truth.
Survanet: I do not know who he is.
All: *Fall over.*
Survanet: But I know how to find out.
Kingnoob: *Gets up.* How!?!
Survanet: It is an ancient Gedunian spell, it shows you people you've known that you forgot about. It will separate alive from dead, and allie from enemy.
Kingnoob: Well cast it!
Survanet: You do not have the requirements.
Chuckie: Oh no, we're never good at those.
Blue: What are they?
Survanet: The one you must first complete is to defeat the four assassins. The Shade, The Hunter, The Mage, and The Incinerator.
Chuckie: Creepy names.
Survanet: This might calm you down, you have fought, and defeated, all of them before.
Kingnoob: Yah, that's a relief.
Survanet: After that the one who is to fight the leader must master all three forms of battle: melee, rangd, and magic.
Kingnoob:I've got the first two...but I have o learn magic? And master it!?!
Lizzy: I can teach you.
Blue: And I should learn it to, once the fighting starts I'll need it.
Survanet: The final test is, the three of you that have been in the clan the longest must retrieve the staffs and sword and cross all three of them. It will reveal the enemy. But if you have not completed the first two tests this will not work.
Kingnoob: That's a mouthful.
Survanet: Wait...the Servant i9s still alive?
Kingnoob: He is!?!
Survanet: ...Who was sent to fight alone?
Blue: 2654, but he's in the other room.
Survanet: Well I can feel...someone just as powerful as the Servant is fighting him.
Kingnoob: What!?! Who!?!
Survanet: *Slowly fades away.* I don't know, I'm terrible at defining people.*Disappears.*
Hi: No doubt there. Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 19:14:40 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:40:38 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter471 - Ser

He was nearly dead, but for some reason kept Ser alive. That was when Ser suddenly became alot stronger, and alot younger. He broke free and kicked the Servant up the stairs.

Ser: You push me down, I kick you up.
Servant: *Gets to feet and throws out a punch.*
Ser: *With almost lightning fast reflexes catches his fist.*Cool!*Pushes the Servant back with his free hand.*
Servant: Oof! Why you little peasant!*Kicks Ser then smashes then jabs his elbow into Ser's back.*
Ser: *Falls to the ground. He strangely feels no pain.*Is that all!?!*Grabs the Servants legs and trips him.*
Servant: *Grabs Ser and throws him through the roof.*
Ser: *Crushes a rune in his bag and begins floating.*
Servant: I see you know the flight spell! Fortunately I can fly as well!*Rockets towards Ser.*
Ser: *Dodges and kicks his chest.*
Servant: *Hits the ground like a meteor.*
Ser: How you like that "all powerful Servant"?
Servant: I'll show you how I like it!*Begins floating, his eyes blood shot. He then thrusts his hands forward and all nearby solid objects fly towards Ser.*
Ser: Oh-*Hit by all of them. He plummets to the ground and creates a crater on impact.*
Servant: I didn't want to kill you, but I had to.
Ser: *Jumps out completely unharmed, and eyes glowing red.*
Servant: *Eyes widen.* So you have powers. Good thing you don't know why.*Punches Ser, only to be blocked and kicked back.*
Ser: Why!?!Why am I like this?
Servant: Never question immortality!*Throws a knife at Ser's heart.*
????????: *Catches the knife and shatters it.*
Servant: Oh great. The two people I didn't want on a team. Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 19:14:40 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:40:50 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter472 - Ser's

????????: Well, that's to bad for you huh?
Servant: It sure is Blackrun.
Ser: Blackrun! Why are you helping me?
Blackrun: *Turns into his true form, Seraya.*
Seraya: We have more in common than you think.
Servant: *Smacks Seraya with a club.*
Ser: *Takes the club and hits the Servant twice as hard.*
Servant: *Stops shocked, he actually felt pain.*
Ser: *Helps Seraya up.*Partners?
Seraya: Partners.*Turns to Blackrun.*
Servant: I'll show you "partners"!*Creates an army of zombie slaves and servants behind himself.*
Ser: Why did I not see that coming?
Blackrun: Tricky, but I'm trickier!*Turns into the Servant.*
Blackrun: Attack the other me!
Servant: No! Attack them!
Ser: STOP! Before we do this can I say it's really old? Can we just fight the enemy like normal people instead of tricking them until there heads blow up?
Zombie: What he say?*Head blows.*
All zombies: What?*Heads blow up.*
Servant:

Ser: I told you! Now let's just fight like regular people!
Blackrun: Normal people don't fight.
Ser: Omg...let's just fight like we wanna kill each other.
Blackrun: ...
Ser: ...Like we wanna kill him and vice versa.
Servant: Omg! I hate random talking during battles.
Black run: That's all Siradam does anymore.
Ser: OMG!
Servant: Well, I'm gonna kill you.
Blackrun: And I'm gonna *Reads flashcard* kick you down the stairs.
Ser: Put some emotion into it!
Servant: Forget this childish script foght! I'm just going to kill you!
Ser: Thank you.
Blackrun:

Ser: That's not what I meant!*Quickly throws the club at the Servant.*
Servant: *Hit in head and falls over.*
Ser: Ugh...this fight is lame. Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 20:24:42 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:41:12 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter473 - The truth is revealed

Servant: *Stands up.*
Blackrun: *Grabs knife and puts it near the Servants heart.*
Ser: Before you die, you are going to answer some questions.
Servant: Like?
Ser: Why do I have my powers?
Blackrun: And me too?
Servant: *Laughs, not evilly, but actually humorous.*I can't believe no one has realized it!
Ser: Realized what!?!
Servant: There are four sons of the Dark king and two sons of the Servant. Fill in the blanks.
Ser: *Drops the club.*
Blackrun: Wait..."Ser"vant, "Ser", "Ser"aya...I get it now.
Servant: You both inherited powers that I have! Shape-shifting and of course the destruction power.
Ser: Well if that's what it's for you've got another thing coming!
Blackrun: *Jabs knife through the Servants heart.*
Servant: *Gasps.*

Suddenly a black hole opens above the three and the Servant flies in, dead. But Blackrun began slowly moving upwards towards it.

Ser: Hold on!*Grabs Blackrun and a conveniently placed root.*
Blackrun: Yah, that "always" works.
Ser: *Fees arms weakening.*Just hold on!
Blackrun: Just let go!
Ser: No!
Blackrun: *Bites Ser's arm.*
Ser: Ow! I'm just trying to save you!*Let's go.*
Blackrun: *Flies in.*
Ser: Eh, He deserved it.

Meanwhile the master scowled loudly for he saw every bit of that fight. It was time to send out his assassins.

?????????: Men, you are my elite squad of assassins.
??????: We realize that!
?????????: Shut it! Now then I will be assigning all of you new names. Griffo is The Shade.*Dramatic music.*Zamtorap is The Mage.*Music continues.*Bulk is the Hunter.*Stops.*and last but not least, Stranger, you are The Incinerator. You know your names, now go! Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 20:24:43 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:41:32 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter474 - The assassins

Kingnoob: Guys, I have a plan for these fights.
Lizzy: Just tell us, I want to start training you guys.
Hi: Be patient.
Lizzy: *Casts ancients on him.*
Kingnoob: We'll split up into four groups...the same groups we'll use for the last fights.
Scorch: What are those?
Kingnoob: I'll go alone. Blue, Hi, and Wave will go together.
Wave: Why us?
Kingnoob: Trust me on this. Lizzy and Milkshake together.
Blue: *Gives Milkshake a warning glance.*
Lizzy: Relax Blue! He paired us up because we're both mages.
Scorch: So I have to go with Chuckie and the robot he fights with?
Kingnoob: No, there are a few citizens of Kinoob I want you to gather for your group.
Chuckie: Then what do I do?
2654: We.
Kingnoob: I want you two to stay and gaurd the city.
Chuckie: With him!
2654: With it?
Chuckie:

Kingnoob: Omg...GET ALONG!
Both: Never!
Milky: And me?
Kingnoob: You guard the palace.
Chuckie: I thought we were going to guard the palace!
Kingnoob: No, you're guarding the guards.
Chuckie: Then what do they guard.
All: The city!
Chuckie: So why don't we just guard the city.
Kingnoob: Because you'll probably kill each other in the process...so I'm giving you a job that involves no real work.
Scorch: Please tell me the demon isn't always like this.
Blue: Whiny, complaining, lazy, fish-obsessed. Those are all the traits of "everybody's" favorite demon.
Scorch: Ok...
Wave: Well then, we had better move out.
Blue: Not yet...there's some food I haven't had in a while that I'm dieing to taste.
Lizzy: If you take one step into that kitchen, instead of out the door to fight I'll make that wish a reality.
Blue: You're still mad I left huh?
Lizzy: Oh yah.
Both:

Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 20:24:51 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:43:22 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter475 - The catapult

Kinoob plaza, the next day...

Kingnoob: Are we all ready to go?
All: Yes!
Random noise: *Loud bang.*
Kingnoob: ?
Random noise: *Louder bang.*
Chuckie: *In the distance.* Go get it!
2654: *In the distance.* No you go get it! You dropped it!
Chuckie: You made me drop it!
Lizzy: We should probably stop them before they break something.

A few moments later...

Kingnoob: I don't think they broke anything.*Looking at giant catapult being built.*
Blue: What's up with the catapult?
Chuckie: Me and that machine over there thought we could make something to guard the city.
2654: So, me and the red one decided to build a huge catapult.
Kingnoob: But you're supposed to defend the guards not blow everything up!
Chuckie: We didn't blow anything up!
Hammer: *Explodes.*
Chuckie: ...Before I just said that!
Wave: What will you guys even shoot?
2654: We haven't agreed on that yet. I want to shoot giant bombs.
Chuckie: And I want it to shoot rocks.
Hi: Yeah, rocks. That's original.
Blue: But it's pointed away from the gate.
Lizzy: And it's huge! How are you going to hit anything with it!?!
Chuckie: Like this!*Puts pebble into the catapult.* Fire!
2654: *Cuts a rope.*
Catapult: *Throws pebble.*
All: ...
Chuckie: Wait for it.
All: ...
Wave: This is lame.
Blue: Very.
Man: *Walks up with bloody forehead.*I'm pressing charges.*Dies.*
Chuckie: *Looks in his forehead.*Yes! Our catapult works!
Lizzy: So you shot a rock and killed the chef, big deal!
Chuckie: That was the chef!?!
Blue: Either the chef or the royal fisherman.
Chuckie: *Falls over and shatters.*
2654: Do you think we could sell his shards for 20gp?
Chuckie shard: No! I'm worth at least 100gp!
Chuckie shard2: Yeah!
Chuckie shards 3-1,000: Yeah! Give us some credit!
Wave: That is the strangest thing I've seen all day.
Lizzy: Don't you mean all year?
Wave: No.

*Flashback.*

Blue: Hey Wave, want a Donut?
Wave: I haven't had one in years!
O_o

: *Pops out of the donut.*HI!
Blue: *Smashes the donut.* Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 20:24:52 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:43:48 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter476 - Another wilderness friend

Wave: Holy (bleep)! I thought we were going to go fight!
Scorch: I know!
Kingnoob: Not my fault >.<
Chuckie: *Trying to push the catapult outside the gate.
2654: We're blocking the exit!
Blue: *Eye twitching.*I'm going to blow that thing up!
Chuckie: Don't! This thing took us so long to make!
Hi: What!?! You woke up this morning and built it in two hours!
Chuckie: And that's a long time!
2654: Just wait, we'll unblock the gate soon enough.
Kingnoob: *Walks up and lightly pokes the catapult.*
Catapult: *Flies outside.*
Chuckie: *Does two front flips and lands on his head.*OW!
Kingnoob: It's out!
Chuckie: Grr.
Blue: Now let's go!

Later...

Blue: Wave, Hi.
Both: Yah?
Blue: I think we're lost.
Hi: Are you kidding me!?! You 'think' we're lost!
Wave: We've only been searching the wilderness for three hours!
Blue: Well this map-
Hi: *Turns it around.*
Blue: ...Chuckie.
Wave: Now, where are we?
Blue: Uhh...you'll never believe me.
Hi: Try us.
Blue: *Points at something.*
Revenant(20):

Wave: You're right, I don't believe it.

After a few minutes of fighting...

Revenant: Spare me!
Wave: Seeing that you're that last Revenant...
Hi: And that you don't know how to fight.
Revenant: I do to!
Hi: We''l spare you, but you're our pet now!
Revenant: Are you drunk or something?
Blue: Not him...
Revenant: Omg! Just kill me!
Wave: No! We'll name you...
Blue: REV!
Revenant: Is it just me...or do these people match the description of the people that kidnapped a Zamorak demon?
Wave: Chuckie isn't kidnapped!
Blue: He's just lazy.
Rev: Yep...These are the people Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 20:24:52 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:44:13 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter477 - The assassins

Kingnoob walked slowly, every time he took a step he checked every direction, it seemed that he was scared. Then a branch snapped...

Kingnoob: *Has heart attack.*
Snail: *Touches Kingnoob.*
Kingnoob: I'm ok.
Snail: *Laughs to self*
Kingnoob: You broke the branch!?!
Snail: *Rolls eyes.*
Kingnoob: *Kicks the snail.*
Snail: *Sent flying.*AAAAAAAAAAH!
Kingnoob: That takes care of that.
The Hunter: *Sneaks up on Kingnoob.*

Meanwhile somewhere else...

Scorch: Alright men.*Looking at two people.*We are going to fight a dangerous foe, are you up to it?
??????: No.
??????: Yah, you forced us to come here.
Scorch: Shut up Monkey man!
Monkey: -.-
??????: I think I should lead-
Scorch: Why!?!
??????: Because I'm Rafmox! I was already in the clan!
Chuckie: Yah, like you were ever in the clan.
Scorch: What are you doing here!?!
Chuckie: You're in Kinoob plaza...wasn't hard.
Monkey: So are we going to fight this person or not?
Chuckie: *Stomach rumbles.*I'm sorry, but I have a 'meeting' to attend to.
Scorch: He is ruining this story.
Rafmox: And like you aren't?

Suddenly lightning cracks, and a very large man appears out of nowhere.

Chuckie: *Comes back.*Never mind, the lightning canceled the meeting.
The Shade: ?
Chuckie: Go away bub, I've gotta take a shower and burn myself.
The Shade: *Punches Chuckie.*
Chuckie: *Sent flying towards the castle.* Thanks!
Monkey: *Punches The Shade.*
Shade: ...
Monkey: Uhh... any help?

In the wild...

Rev: *Chewing on leash.*
Blue: Stop that!
Rev: Help me!
Hi: And I thought revenant's were supposed to be fearless.
Rev: I heard that!
Blue: *Falls to the ground in pain.*What was that?
Hi: I think our enemy found us.
Blue: *Looks up and sees The Incinerator.*Stranger!
Incinerator: *Eyes Blue, then Rev.*
Rev: *Pulls out a turkey bone and chews on it nervously.*
Incinerator: They don't pay any of us enough to do this job.
Director: Just follow your script!
Incinerator: Sheesh...whatever. Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 20:24:53 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:44:32 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter478 - Task one

Kingnoob stopped to listen, then quickly spun around and kicked The Hunter in the chest. The Hunter recovered faster than Kingnoob could react. The Hunter kicked Kingnoob back and pulled out a sword.

Kingnoob: B-Bulk? How did you-
Hunter: Survive!?!
Kingnoob: Yes!
Hunter: Oh...well I don't know how. Derponet I guess.
Kingnoob: *Knocks the sword out of Hunter's hand and punches him in the face.*
Hunter: *Staggers back and throws a punch at Kingnoob.*
Kingnoob: *Ducks and throws another punch.*
Hunter: *Grabs his fist and throws him over his shoulder.*
Kingnoob: *Lands with a thud.*
Hunter: *Jumps in the air, and aims to land on Kingnoob.*
Kingnoob: *Quickly throws up his hand and a black bubble appears around himself.*
Hunter: *Bounces off of the bubble.*I'm fighting a noob with Dark king powers.
Kingnoob: Yes you are.

Meanwhile...

Lizzy: *Casts snowstorm at 'The Mage.'*
Mage: *Destroys the attack and casts hurricane.*
Milkshake: *Jumps in front and casts Inferno, countering it.*
Mage: *Raises hands and shards of stones fly towards Lizzy and Milkshake from all directions.*
Lizzy: *Pulls Milkshake behind her and casts shield.*
Milkshake: *Sinks into the ground.*
Mage: *Casting Inferno at the shield like crazy.*
Milkshake: *Pops up behind The Mage.*Hello.
Mage: *Spins around.*
Lizzy: *Quickly uses tri-bomb.*
Mage: *Hit, and flips over Milkshake.*
Milkshake: *Turns towards The Mage and casts air knife.*
Mage: *Blocks with blaze and quickly uses engulf.*
Lizzy: *Back flips over the attack and casts flood.*
Mage: *Hit by the water and loses control of engulf.*
Milkshake: *Casts snowstorm, freezing The Mage.*
Lizzy: That went quick.
Milkshake: Yah.
Mage: *Turns red and breaks out of the ice.* Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 20:24:54 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:44:56 by Sirapyro

Sirapyro

Posts: 10,736 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Chapter479 - Task one 2

Chuckie: *Eating a fish, watching Scorch, Big, and Monkey trying to beat 'The Shade.'*
Scorch: We could use some help!*Dodges a sword.*
Chuckie: Let me finish my salmon.
Monkey: That's trout!
Chuckie: I know.*Points to a giant pile of salmon.*
Shade: Even I agree that's pure laziness.*Hit by Big.*
Big: Yah, take that you shade!
Shade: *Punches Big twice as hard.*
Big: *Falls back.*
Monkey: *Tries to punch The Shade, but misses and get hit.*
Scorch: *Kicks The Shade to the ground and stomps on him.*
Shade: *Grabs his foot and throws him away.*
Big: *Slowly stands up.* Hey! You wanna piece of me?
Shade: *Turns towards Big.*
Big: That's right, come get me.
Shade: *Charges at Big.*
Big: *Moves to the side and trips The Shade.*
Shade: Why you!
Monkey: Ugh...demon help us!
Chuckie: *Sighs.***.
Shade: *Shrieks and looks at Chuckie.*
Chuckie: *Shrugs.*
Shade: *Takes a step towards Chuckie.*
Chuckie: La la la.
Shade: *Falls to knees in pain.*

Meanwhile...

Incinerator: *Pulls out a giant mace and swings it and Blue.*
Blue: Aah!*Ducks.*
Rev: What?*Hit.*Cheeseburgers.*Falls over.*
Hi: That takes care of him, now for the brute.
Blue: His name is The Stranger, he was one of our original enemy's.
Wave: I thought Rat was your original enemy.
Blue: After Rat!
Incinerator: *Grabs Blue.*
Blue: Help!
Wave: *Pulls out whips and runs to help Blue.*
Incinerator: *Grabs Wave with the other hand.*
Hi: Ha! You only have two hands so you can't grab me!
Incinerator: *Kicks Hi in the head.*
Hi: Ow, that really-
Incinerator: *Kicks him again.*
Hi: Ow!
Incinerator: *Throws Blue and Wave at Hi.*
Hi: Aah!*Hit by both.*
Blue: He has gotten alot stronger.
Wave: What was your first clue?
Hi: We need help!
Rev: ...
Hi: Well he isn't going to be any help.
Blue: *Sees the turkey bone.*I have an idea. It's a complete guess but still an idea.
Wave: What?
Incinerator: *Pulls out mace.*
Blue: First, RUN!
Hi: Good plan. Join The Questing Clan of RuneScape! !

30-Nov-2008 20:24:54 - Last edited on 05-Dec-2008 01:45:15 by Sirapyro

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The Kingnoob series