RuneScape Forum Archive

(this is only to Chapter 6, I never correct all mistakes)
“You know what? You are making it really hard to not want to kill you,” Adams face scrunched as he glared at the crooked man.
>>Forgot the all-important apostrophe after the ‘m’ in Adam.
“That is all I have asked,” Replied the Zamorak follower smugly.
>> Need a lowercase ‘r’ in ‘Replied’. First letter after quotated dialogue that ain’t a proper noun is lowercase.
The raspy voiced man tore the ruined hood off and Adam recoiled at the sight.
>> ‘raspy voiced’ needs to be hyphenated (raspy-voiced).
“It’s a tract of land near the bandit camp.” She added.
>> ‘she’ needs to be lowercased.

He spoke in a gruff voice, “Hello young lady,” He covered his crime with courtesy, “we are glad to have you at our residence.
>> Need a comma after ‘Hello’. Lowercase the ‘he’ after ‘lady’.
Thankfully, your grammar is very good so it saves me from the more often correction. Only minor errors, completely fixable. Your imagery, let me say, is great. I love how you described Adam in the arena, even if it was a relatively short plot. Really, no material so far to help me pull ends together for a visible plot.However, the Sandstone tablet does make me wonder…
*clears throat* Anyways, good job. I’ll get to the rest later.

02-Dec-2008 22:03:02