RuneScape Forum Archive | |::Diary Of A Noob::| <>FULL<>

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

DAY TWENTYSEVEN -Last minute configurations-
How can me and Yoshi profit from this war? We had to find a way so that I and he could weap the glory at the very end, thereby becoming more famous then before... BUT HOW!?!? That’s when I got the most brilliant idea! Putting butter...ON TOAST!! Crazy I know, but it sounds like it could work! Oh yeah I was suppose to be thinking of a way to get some of the glory...oh well, im sure when the time arises, I’ll steal someone's glory. Me and Yoshi and about...oh... 3000 other people were all ordered to trained until either death came, or the end of the day (which sounds good cuz the end of the day is only 30 minutes away), but then he said..On VENUS...HOW LONG IS A DAY ON VENUS? Let’s see here carry the 2...subtract 5... 565 DAYZ!!?!? Omg its day is longer then it's year. -.- I don't think the commander is joking either.
My squad, code named "weaklings" (must stand for something strong), was told to train on cows for the day. So we did. We trained. Then trained. Then trained. then trained. then had tea and biscuits. then trained then trained, then got hit by a train, then trained some more! man what a day! that’s an interesting diary journal right? After all that training I got to combat lvl 18! OMG! I must be the strongest person by now!! BOW DOWN IN FEAR! Yoshi was also lvl 18, though I still believe myself to be superior..CUZ I AM! right? am I right? can I get a wo0t wo0t! *crickets* ok I get the point.. Anyway, after a quick training session, I was summoned by the king himself....ok it wasn't the king, it was one of his advisors, but give me a freaking break here people, trying to be entertaining.

21-Jan-2008 00:16:58 - Last edited on 21-Oct-2008 20:25:41 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

I went to the king's chambers, and there the king was, on his throne. "ahh! Mr. Noob, Glad to see you came in a hurry." "I *pant* don't *pant* know what *pant* your *pant* talking about *pant" "lets get down to business Mr. Noob, im sure you're aware of the upcoming war" "OMG THERE'S A WAR!?!?" "Yes... it was said yesterday...
also you said it yourself like on day you joined the army, see? It’s right here in your diary" "what diary?" "He’s a bigger noob then we originally thought..." "Thx!" I said proudly. "Man you’re giving me a migraine lets just discusses what I want to discuss" "fair enough" I said. "Ok, we need some 'ambassadors' to go to the goblin base just before us so the goblins are drawn out. I want you to be apart of that." "So.....we're bait?" "Umm..... Yes I guess you can call it that, but the term I would use is 'ambassador'".

Wo0t!! IM BAIT!!

21-Jan-2008 00:16:58 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2008 00:35:09 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

DAY TWENTYEIGHT - "mourning" the lost -

its weird, No body talked to me or Yo*hi today...they walked past us whispering and pointing at us with hidden faces, looks like they are seeing a guy that is about to be killed! But it is just me and you*hi, since the war is tomorrow, me and Yoshi go into the bar for a last drink before the war! "Hey barkeep a round over here!" "Free of charge." the barkeep said, then walked away...slowly..."well that was nice of him!" said Yo*hi! "Cheers!" and with that we drank. After that we decided to walk around varrock, when we passed the church, priests started praying in Latin. "Ok...." I said. "Right back at you!" said Yo*hi. When we passed by a park with some families with kids and babies in it, all got quiet (even the babies), and looked at us... "Ok what is going on!?!?!? It’s ok every!" I said loudly, "we are not going to die tomorrow." Yoshi looks stunned when he reads a poster; it said "See 2 idiots get killed tomorrow! Tickets for sale!"
"ooooohh!! Now I get it!! They all bought tickets and they are ashamed so they did*’t speak to us!!" "well...erm...no. they wont speak to us because they were overwelled with joy that we are going to die that they were speakless(again, even that babies)" "how do u know that!?" i said "i am just good at reading posters." then i continue to read the poster. "Don’t make them think they are gonna die! Or it will be less of a fight when they do! Share in the bloodshed! It’s a family event! Bring the kids!!"
....................................so....that’s how its gonna be! Well I’ll showem! I’ll be the "bait" tomorrow and I’ll survive! Just watch!!!"

21-Jan-2008 00:16:59 - Last edited on 22-Jan-2008 00:54:16 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

DAY 29 -Clashing conflicts-

Today's the big day! Today’s the day that Yo*hi took his monthly bath! Oh, and some war'* happening today or something.... Early in the morning, Yoshi and I Were called down to the auditorium (A.K.A the chair that the commander steps on), so we had to go there first. Tell ya the truth; I didn't even stay awake through the "important" meeting. It was way to boring for my taste. So I fell asleep and Yoshi filled me in later. Based on what Yoshi said, the commander was prepping team B.A.I.T, which stands for Brave and Idiotic Titans. I take that with great offense. I never said I wanted to be a Titan! Just ruler of runescape! That too much to ask? Geez some people are just so stupid! Anyway, about the special patrol, He said he's sending team B.A.I.T to go in first as a secret covert unit....then blow all that secrecy to high heavens by making lots and lots of noise to draw them out.
For about an hour or 2 the entire camp was abuzz with activity, getting ready for departure. Finally the time came and we were asked to pick up our stuff and report to the main gate. As in our training, we stood in formation. Me, Yo*hi, and the rest of team B.A.I.T got to walk at the front of the group (front line might have the most casualties, but defiantly a score on the view!). Team B.A.I.T consists of me, Yo*hi, and 98 other people. All together, the varrock army had about 2000 troops marching towards the main camp. The goblins have 3500, which is why we asked help from the fally army, whose army has had a surplus of soldiers for a long, long time. The Fally army gave the varrock army 1000 of their well-trained fighting force. At the moment, fally is the strongest military power. The last place that messed with fally turned from a lush forest to a complete desert (al kaird)... see where im going with this? Noone messes with fally. Not even me...and that’s saying something! But don't worry...

21-Jan-2008 00:16:59 - Last edited on 22-Jan-2008 00:57:20 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

In time all will be mine, fally will fall eventually...The giant gates opened, Which is weird because I didn't see any giant gates in varrock when I came in here...did you see it? Anyway, there have been these giants’ gates, I guess for dramatic effect. When the doors were fully opened, the commander gave us the signal to march, and onward we went! Simultaneously marching, the occasionally, some tripped, and it made this weird domino effect, it was fuuuunny! We marched for hours and hours, taking only 1 short break in between. The armor was starting to get hot (we were given steel chain armor, and steel platelegs for the journey there, once we get there, we will dress into our platemail armor. OMG steel! How lucky am I. im getting the special treatment)? Finally we reached the 2/3 mark AKA Falador, where we rested for about an hour and waited for the extra Fally troops to arrive. After an hour-long rest, the Falador troops showed up. And we were off once again, Looking like a much bigger army then we did before (wonder why).
We reached the battle field finally. The Army hid in the forest (which was just a small bush...hehehe the goblins will never see us...), and team B.A.I.T was sent out. We got about 100 yards from the castle, and rose our standard. The goblins saw us at once. They started laughing. You could tell they were taking us seriously, by the fear in the laughs. We brought out 100 more troops and the goblins got the message. "Team B.A.I.T!" I yelled. "Now we show them that we can survive, now we show them that we can-!" but I was rudely interrupted by the charging of team B.A.I.T's feet charging the castle. Darn, Did I miss something? The goblins got a worried face on their looks, and gave a command over the loudspeaker. The Front doors were opened. Thousands of goblins poured out.
The battle had begun.

21-Jan-2008 00:17:00 - Last edited on 22-Jan-2008 00:58:28 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

The Entire Goblin army poured out of the gates and lined up. It took about 10 minutes for the entire army to get out. While they were doing that, the varrock/fally army lined up as well. The commander up front and me on the front lines (hehe, just as an expected, great view!). The goblin army was mostly made up of swordsmen, but some, line the front lines, had spears. We also mainly have swordsmen, but also lots of mace men, sledgehammer dudes, and battle axes. Me? I have a sledgehammer! Wo0t!!! Yoshi had a mace.
Silence. Total silence. Each side ready to start, but at the same time not wanting to charge first. Finally the commander on our team grunted. Every1 looked at him. "It is our time! Charge men...CHARGE!!" And with that, all our side of the army yelled our loudest, and we started to run. The battle has truly begun.
The goblins saw us start to charge, and got their spears ready. We could tell that their moral was low, our surprise attack had worked! Then the 2 armies started to get closer and closer... 100 yards....50 yards.... 25 yards.... 10 yards... and then finally, an unstoppable force met an unmovable object. The ring of sharp clashing reached our ears.
I jumped, avoiding the spears, and brought my sledge hammer down with a backwards hook to strike one of the spearmen in the head. The first casualty of the battle lets get this par-tay started. I spun my S-hammer around my body in a 360 degree circle, and I hit one of the goblins in the ribs. He yelped in pain, but didn't have time to do anything else, before I lifted my sledge hammer and I.....well You know what I'm gunna do. It’s not like I'm lifting my S-hammer to make a Sunday yaw know? After another happy customer was done with, I turned around, ducked, barley dodging a sword aimed at my shoulder. As I came out of the swirling duck, I Used my shield and tripped the enemy and sledge hammered him. This is my kind of action!

21-Jan-2008 00:17:00 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2008 00:36:21 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

BUT just then, as I turned I saw out of the corner of my eye that a sword was about to hit me! It was too late to dodge it! I was going to die! How could I take over runescape if I was dead?! Who would be yo*hi's friend? Who would protect my title in the runescape beer drinking records? Couldn’t I have raised my sword in time it took to ask myself these questions!? I was doomed; I closed my eyes, and accepted it. Just then I heard the clang of metal, and I thought I had died, I opened my eyes and YOSHI was right besides me, his mace raised to block the sword. He grinned. The goblin looked on horrified. Yoshi laughed. Good 'ol Yo*hi. Then Yoshi kicked down the goblin and struck him with his mace. "Lol! You owe me big time! You owe me big time! You owe me big-" he didn't have time to say the rest before I tackled him out of the way of a spear that was going to hit him. "Umm....We're even?" "Lol" I said and grinned.
I jumped up, he jumped up, and we were back to back. "Duck!" I yelled. "Where?" Yoshi said and turned around. "NOOO!!" I yelled and raised my sword to try to block the side-swiping sword (try to say that 10 times fast). I did manage to connect, but the momentum was still there. The tip of the sword pierced yo*hi's arm, but with not much force. Yoshi roared in agony, and dropped to his knees. "GRRR!" I yelled to the goblin, and I threw the sledge hammer at him and it hit him square in the chest. Bull** eye! I ran over to Yo*hi. "Yo*hi! Speak to me! Are you all right!" "It won't kill me" he said, a stream of tears rolling down his face.
I jumped up, got up on a very well-placed coffee table (same one I tripped on in on the cow killing day! I notice it because of the chip in the side). I look around, and all the goblins were about gone! The few that were left were running away, or at least trying to. We....we did it...
WE HAD WON....but at what price?

21-Jan-2008 00:17:01 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2008 00:36:40 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

DAY THIRTY - What to do? -

As the healthy solders carried the wounded, I carried Yoshi over my shoulder. He was in pain I sensed, or it’s just because has screaming "OWWW!! I AM IN PAIN!!" that might be it. I felt bad for him, he was wounded so badly I didn't think he would be able to live... the worn and tatered army of less then 500 people slowly made its way back to fally, many die before we make it to fally. But Yo*hi stays alive. Yoshi scared me a few times because he closed his eyes for a while and did*’t respond to me. Once I said "you*hi! Please don’t die!" he opened his eyes slowly, and said, "don’t worry Noob, I can*t die, I am a main character." "Shh!!!" I whispered. Once the army returned, the people celebrated! But once they saw the looks on our faces, they were quickly silenced. I dropped off Yo*hi at the hospital, and I was summoned to the king’s chambers once I was there. I walked before the king of varrock and Falador.
"Noob."Said the king of varrock, "I never thought I would say this but, u did a very good job."
"yes I agree...”replied the king of fally.
"War changes men." (Really did*’t change, I was busting with anticipation because they were gonna make me king!!)
"So. In honor of what u have done, we want to promote you, to commander of the southwest flank."
I thought about it for a second...and then i had one of those flash backs where u see a mirror image of urself, and think about the life you would have to take. It was pretty cool!!! The only time I did*’t bring my camera too!!!
"Sorry kings, I must decline, I wasn’t fit for being in the army (I was meant to rule it! but I did*’t say this part), I may return one day, but until then..."
"you are always welcome in our kingdoms." said the king of fally.

And just like that...my days in the army were over. That's right. I lasted a full week....almost...

21-Jan-2008 00:17:01 - Last edited on 22-Jan-2008 01:12:06 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

DAY 31 -switching plans-
Why did I not accept the general's offer? Well, it's just because I don't think It was my time, you know? Like maybe I wasn't ready yet.....aw who am I kidding, I was incredibly drunk and Had no idea what was happening. WHY!!! to bad it was a 1-time deal. Even if I go back and accept it, some1 else already probably filled the slot. darn, now how am I going to make myself king? I KNOW! I just have to switch tatics, alittle error on *cough* yo*hi's *cough* part isn't going to stop me from making it to the top! I just have to clear my head! hmm...... TURTLE!!! wait i thought of something!!! lets try that again.......... TURTLE THAT CAN FLY, wait turtles can't fly! well... I guess it's possible if you attach like a glider or something... but wait, wouldn't that be gliding then? So then the turtle wouldn't be flying it would be- DARN I CAN'T CLEAR MY HEAD!!
OMG THATS IT!!!!! k lets see.... clear my head... heads can be found at an evil science lab... there's beakers at labs.... sneakers ryhme with beakers... sneakers are used to run... bad guyz run away.....PIRATES ARE BAD GUY THAT GET STUFF AND RUN AWAY!! it all makes perfect sense now!!!
"hey yo*hi! guess what!" "what?" he said, excidily. "I know what we can do!..... we can be ASTRONAUTS!!!" "omg great idea!!!" He exclaims. "oh wait" he saids, disapointally. "astronauts aren't invented until space travel, which isn't for a good 7 centuries." yoshi said sadly. "ok then, we'll be pirates!" "ok, thats the 2nd best thing!" yelled yo*hi.
"but we do have to think this through" said yoshi, inquiringly. "what do you mean?" I ask. "well you see, what happens after all the things we do? either it blows up, we kill it, or we end up getting to drunk and we miss it." "hmm... i see what you mean." "well" continued yo*hi. "We just have to take it a step at a time, remember to be- OMG LOOK A FURNACE!" "LETS GO JUMP IN IT!" i yell. "omg i love peanuts!" "I do to!" and we jump into the furnace.

21-Jan-2008 00:21:05 - Last edited on 22-Jan-2008 01:13:56 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

Posts: 15,220 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

DAY THRITYTWO - the new life -
Once it was decided, me and yoshi went to the nearest port. Only took a few hours of searching! Yo*hi got jumped by this highway-man. It was Fuuuuuunnny!! He kept saying "stand and deliver!", even though he was bleeeding to death on the ground. He droped something called a "white phat"
"hmmm..."i said,"i have seen this before."
"yeah you can make alot of money off those."
I got a whole 5k for it!! just imagine my excitment!!
we get to this place called "port sarim", and, by the off stroke of luck , wal-mart was having a "buy 1 get 1 free" kinda sail on boats. but we only needed 1 boat. so, i gave them the 5k i jsut earned (it was heart-wrenching). but, unfortunatly...it was stolen by pirates (who knew)
"well, that was a sudden plot twist." said yo*hi
"Yesh! light lord tell flame to stop getting our hopes up!" i said
"sry guys, it makes a good story! and you cant start at the top or the story would end to quickly! now do what your paid for!"flame bird0 said
"YOU DONT PAY US!!" yoshi and i said.
~back 2 the story~
So, we had to start as cabin boys in a ship called the Death Trap.

21-Jan-2008 00:21:06 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2008 00:38:21 by FriendshipUI

Forums

|::Diary Of A Noob::| <>FULL<>