RuneScape Forum Archive | |::Diary Of A Noob::| <>FULL<>

FriendshipUI

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DAY EIGHTYFOUR -packin up 'n shipin out-
Yo*hi's log. Stardate-
"oh no, we're not starting with that again!" Yelled Amy.
"Eek! run away from the mean lady with claws! Hisss! HISSSS!" Rambled Yo*hi.
*Amy tackles Yoshi and gets back the diary*
"Meany, never lettin me have any fun..." Yoshi Wined. "This isn't about fun, it's about saving this world!" scolded Amy. "That doesn't sound very fun..." Yoshi pouted, arms folded like a 4 year old. "Oh shush and let me write in the diary." Amy snapped.
Don't worry, Yoshi won't bother us again. I drugged his soup to make him sleep for a few hours. *Distant thud in the backround* ANyway, let me fill you in on what's going on. It all started about a week ago...
It all started with me, Yo*hi, Doodle, Oreo, and all of our antis around the wartable. A guard burst into the room and ran up to the wartable, clearly out of breath. Everyone couldn't help but notice the man wasn't wearing any pants. But that isn't what worried everyone; it was the look on his face. A face of pure panic is dismay. "What is wrong soldier?" Asked the Anti-Noob. "H-Hopeless spies have been captured, b-but 2 managed to escape. Sir, if they reach the fortress before we do, then our location will be given away!" The guard said, trembling. "What!" Gasped the Anti-Noob. Wow, it can't get much worse then this..."
The guard wimpered. The anti-Noob's head shot up. "is there something else wrong?" The anti-Noob asked, fearful**** guard gulped and started talking again. "Um... sir... The spies were found in the...the...brewery. I'm horrified to say, they were sucessful in their main objective." The guard paused, getting everyone's attention. "They contaminated our entire beer supply!" Sobbed the guard. Random screams of chaos were heard across the room.

21-Jan-2008 02:08:51 - Last edited on 28-Jan-2008 20:25:37 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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"We're all going to die!"
"ALl hope is lost!"
"15 minutes can save you 15% or more on car insurance!"
"we cannot last!"
"all hope is lost!"
"wait, I already said that line!"
"Really!?"
"Yes! come up with your own random scream!"
"A thousand pardons!"
"It's quite alright, just remember this in the future!"
and tons of other yells.
"Silence!" thundered the Anti-Noob. Everyone became instantly quiet. Anti-Noob sat back down in his war chair and put his face in his hands. "What is a leader to do in such a desperate state." he asked himself.
I, peronsonally didn't see what the big deal was. But I know the drill. You ask an obvious question around here and the audience gasped and says in one voice "you don't know what (any word) is?" And they would break out into a dance and musical number on why it's important, and I'm not having that happen again, no sir.
Anti-Oreo cleared is throught and said. "Anti-Noob, my friend, you do know our only hope by now is to send a small party of us to the fortress, and pray we get there before the hopeless do, or even better, intercept them." He said.
The anti-Noob gave a big, long sigh. "I was hoping it didn't have to come to this. I always hoped, in the back of my mind, that we could end this peacfully with no one dying. I grew up with that thought, like warmth in the dark, and now I see that there is no way that can be. War is enevitable. War is a reality. And war is something we need to be prepared for." The anti-Noob gave in. He suddenly looked up with a determined look on his face. "If this is how it has to be, then let us end this for the better." He then got up and started circling the war table, everyone in the room listening to him.
"It obvious, by now, that this battle cannot be won by brute force. No, I'm afraid we're out numbered 30 to one, if not worse then that. Our only hope is a stealth mission. If the Noob's diary is accurate, they're about to disscover something big."

21-Jan-2008 02:08:51 - Last edited on 21-Oct-2008 21:04:49 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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Personally, I want to be there and help them in what ever weakness they discover."
The others around us nodded in agreement.
"Our group has to be small, because we must travel a great distance in a short ammount of time. I'm thinking no more then 20 people. Seeing on how this is the final stand, I'm going to need some of my best. Yo*hi, Amy, Oreo, and Doodle, seeing on how your the Noob's friends, your comming. Joining you will be me, Anti-Yo*hi, Anti-Amy, Anti-Oreo, and Anti-Doodle. I will also be bringing along 4 of my best mages, 3 of my best swordsmen, and 2 of my most accurate archers."
The Noob looked at the selected few. "So, it comes down to this. one last fight, one last chance. Get a good nights sleep. Tomorrow, we set off on the journey through hell."

21-Jan-2008 02:11:40 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2008 02:17:07 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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DAY EIGHTYFIVE -The destroyer-
Man oh man it's good to have the ol' diary back again. I received my diary back when Iwoke up this morning I found Chuck Norris at my bedside holding the diary. I rubbed the sleepies from my eyes and graciously took back my diary. "Gee, thanks Chuck Norris!" I said.
"Don't thank me, it's what I do" He said as he tipped his hat. And then, in a flash, he was gone.
I got straight up and looked at my quote-a-day calender. "You are a special person" heehee! Doesn't that just make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? HOLD ON JUST ONE SECOND! today's the day we invade the warroom, I totally forgot! OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG what am I going to wear!? oh, right, my armor, duh. I quickly got dressed and headed off to the guard station. As I walked I thought about Alexflorea. He's the amazing off-screen guy that keeps the plan running like clockwork. You may not see him do amazing thing, but take it from me...wait don't take it from me, I want it back! you little stinker I want it back! GIVE IT TO ME!
*tackles random guy*
anyway, back to alexflorea. He's one who got us stationed at the war room at the time of the ball. Bad news is that there are 3 other guards guarding it with us, including a demon guard! That's how I want to die; crying while he rips me to shreads... with a potato in my hand. WHY A POTATO? for commic relief, so when the Private investigator is studying my death he says "wells, he died, but he's holding a potato in his hand. Pretty funny I do have to say sir." (Thanks demetri martin for that joke inspiration!).

21-Jan-2008 02:11:49 - Last edited on 28-Jan-2008 20:34:32 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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As I walked into the guard station, I saw Alex talking lightly to the other guards we were suppose to be with. Even the demon guard... He looked like he was...um... enjoying human company. Pretty weird. I walked up to them and Alex greeted me. "Ah, great, the final member of our group is here. Ok, it's time to move and relief the other shift. Best not dilly-dally." Alex said, and led the way out of the room.
Me and the other guards walked as one. It was like the army. Left foot, right foot, left foot, MIDDLE FOOT, wait how'd that get in there? Anway, so we eventually got to the warroom, and releived the guards who were there of their duty. "Thank god" One commented. "C'mon, we still might make it to bob's opening speech at the ball." another guard said, before they walked off.
Alex and I exchanged looks that told me what we needed to do. (Actually, to be honest, I didn't know what he was trying to tell me, I just nodded my head. I found out later what he was trying to tell me) We needed to somehow get these guards away from this door. And I had the perfect plan...
"Cmon, I already helped you out already today" Said Chuck Norris. "Oh pleeease! You owe me for saving your wife, kids, dog, other wife, and half bird half monkey half hippo thing!" (Yes 3 halves of a whole, only Chuck Norris could pull that off) Chuck Norris sighs. "ok fine, but after this I don't owe you anything!" He said. I squealed with glee. MY PLAN WAS COMMING TOGETHER. Now just to lure the human guards around that corner...
"Lemonade! Selling lemonade! I said in the girlest voice possible. Around the corner, I heard the guards say "Mm! lemonade! lets disreguard our jobs and go get some!" "lets!" Said the 2 human guards. As they rounded the corner, Chuck Norris jumped out in a gingerbread suit and yelled "You can't catch me! I'm the gingerbread man!" and roundhouse kicked em in the face.

21-Jan-2008 02:11:54 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2008 02:17:45 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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As Chuck Norris was hiding the bodies, He said "Good plan, but why did I need to be wearing a gingerbread man outfit?" He asked. "hey, I don't tell you how to do your job, you don't tell me how to do mine." I said in response. With that, Chuck Norris was gone in a flash, never to be heard or copywrited again.
Now that just left the demon guard. I have a few plans. the first one involves a knife, half a monkey, and a hot air balloon. Wait a second... Where'd the demon guard go? I rounded the corner and saw no sign of the demonguard. Only Alex was in the hallway. I whispered to Alex "Where'd he go?" I asked. Alex's gaze was transfixed on the door. "What do you mean where is he? He's right here-" He stopped cold as he turned around and saw the demon guard acompanying them was gone. "Is this a good or bad thing?" I asked. "Doesn't matter, what does matter is that we need to get inside this room, fast." He said. I threw him the key and he unlocked the door. The big iron door swung open heavily. "go inside." Said Alex. "I'll keep watch out here in case the demon guard comes back." He said. I agreed and continued into the room.
It was a large, dark room. Over the room were scattered papers of plans to be. In the center of the room was the war table, big and opulent. A single chest was on the table. I'm guessing his plan is in there. I approached it cautiously. This was the moment of truth. What was in that chest? Could it mean the distruction of the resistance? Could all this work be for naught? Did I feed Stewie before I left the room!?
I gulped as I reached for the chest, and unlatched it's lock. The gravity of the room was almost to much to bare.
FREEZE TIME!
The days before I came into this room, I've been mentally preparing. I was expecting to find something in there that would make me collaspe to my knees and yell "Noooooo!" Belive me, I practiced.
Unfreeze time!

21-Jan-2008 02:11:55 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2008 02:18:02 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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I threw back the chest top and covered my eyes, so I wouldn't see what was there right away. I slowly peeled opened my eyes and, through the darkness, I saw some simple objects. Alot of runes, Mostly Astril and body runes, and a piece of papyrus with what looks like a spell written on it. It reads as such:
All of this land, far and near
Will quake and tremble when it draws near.
A monsterous creature on which the sun never set,
one who easily tames the TzTok-Jad as a pet.
Astril, Nature, body alike.
Bring forth this creature of unholy sight.
It reighed it's terror an eon ago,
and the world has become weak without it's glow.
I wake the from thy slumber oh unholy lord,
and kill all those who are unworthy with your sword.

Then it goes on to say some stuff in a different language, I'm guessing Gnome language or something.
Overall, I was disappointed. I was soooo ready to stumble back saying "No...No, it's not possible... It can't be!" But aw well, I work with what they give me. Maybe Alex can give me a more about what this means. Using my awsome ninja-writing skills, I copied the words with a quill and paper that seemed to come out of no where. I stuffed it in my pocket and went near the door, where alex was waiting. "What did you find?" He asked. "I'll tell you back at my room, lets go." I said. We turned around and were face to face with a severly POed demon guard. It growled "I haven't had treacherous human flesh in a while" It is then he Jumped in the air towards us, teeth gnashing. I knew this was a critical moment. A few mili-seconds seperate me from standing on a grave, or in one. I had to think of something fast. I did the first thing that came to mind.

21-Jan-2008 02:11:55 - Last edited on 28-Jan-2008 20:41:01 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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"STOP!" I yelled which such authority that the demon guard acutally stumbled. ~Wow, that actually worked, Now think of something to say, quick!~ I thought to myself. "Listen to me. Is this what you really want? Look at you. Your not a killer! Your just severly misunderstood." I said. The demon guard look at me questionably. "I can tell you don't really want to kill. I think maybe someone just killed you long ago." I said, then aprroached him and put my hand on his heart. "In here." I whispered.
*2 hours later*
The demon guard is now on one of those big phyciatrist sofas and I was there with a notepad getting it all down. "I was always picked on in high school by the other demons. Mostly because our final test was that we had to kill a human, and my human was the only one who asked impatiently 'Can we speed this up a little, getting kinda boring.' Oh the laughter! You know I really never wanted to be a demon guard. But my dad was just so proud of me when I quit ballet and joined the recruiting... He said he was finally proud of me...I just.." He couldn't hold it in any longer and the demon guard burst into tears on my shoulder. "there, there it's alright." I said to the demon guard. "Thanks for l-listenin." The demon guard sniffled. "I've been meaning to get that off my chest for a while."
"No problem. Just do us a favor and don't tell anyone what you saw." I asked. "deal!" He said.
And with that we parted, and returned to my room to decipher the meaning of the spell.
I gave it to Alex and he immmedatly knew what it was. He dropped it in shock, stumbled back and said "no... no it's not possible..." "Hey I was suppose be the on to do that!" I said, angry that he stole my spotlight. "What does it mean? What is bob planning to do?" I asked. "The destroyer..." Alex said unhopfully. "he plans to awaken guthix"

21-Jan-2008 02:11:56 - Last edited on 21-Oct-2008 21:08:45 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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DAY EIGHTYSIX -Ashes to Ashes-
Alex and I were pacing the halls when Alex suddenly threw down his hally in anger. "How could anyone as smart as Bob make such a foolish Mistake!" He shouted. "What makes him think he can control Guthix!? Bob isn't dumb, he has to have a plan... THINK ALEX, THINK!"
I interupted by saying "Umm... what's so bad about Guthix?"
Alex looked at me with confused horror. "What do you mean!?" He asked.
And, using the ultra-cool ninja God smarts no one knew I accuired until just now, I answered his question. "Well, in positive runescape, Guthix is the creator who decides to be a wussy pushover by not using his power and has been sleeping for like 1000 years." I said.
"Well, we're opposite worlds, so the opposite of creating is...?" He waited for my answer. "Taco!" I said. What? I was hungry.
Alex shook his head furiously. "No no no! Destroying! The opposite of creating is destroying!" He said.
"Ohhh that was my third guess." I said.
"What? What was your second guess?" He asked.
"Two tacos." I said proudly.
He sighed and said "look, you're missing the point. Guthix 'the destroyer' caused unimaginable chaos in our world 1000 years ago. Hundreds of attempts were made to contain him, but all failed. Finally, the two immortals Zaros and armdyll, with the help of a few ancient sages, managed to lock Guthix in a crypt that would send him to sleep. The door would last 1 million years on it's own. So, naturally, the awakening of Guthix wasn't predicted to happen for another 1 Million years. Looks like Bob didn't want to wait, and plans to wake him 999,000 Years before he's due." He finished.

21-Jan-2008 02:11:56 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2008 02:18:59 by FriendshipUI

FriendshipUI

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I mulled this over for a few minutes. I then suddenly got my monthly Light-bulb-in-the-ol'-noggin moment. I stopped and reviewed what he said. "You said our worlds are opposite on everything, right?" I asked.
"Mostly yes. Why?" He said.
"Well, if you remember my story, Guthix in my world has enough power to do, or take control of, anything, yet he chooses to be peacful. What does that make your Guthix?" I asked.
Alex thought furosiously. He then snapped up with a smile. "It means Our Guthix doesn't have as much power as it lets on. Which means..."
"He has a weakness." I finished for him.
"Brilliant!" Alex said, completely astonished. "Now all we have to do is find his weakness before Bob mananges to unleash him and we're as good as gold!"
"Yeah... one problem though, how do we do that?" I asked.
Alex though about this for a while. "Tell you what, Anti-Noob and the others should be arriving on the outskirts noon tomorrow, maybe he or some of his mages know something about this and can help. many minds are better then two after all." He said.
"Kinda like how many tacos are better then 2!" I said.
"Noob, drop the taco thing." Alex said.
"But I'm HUUUUUUUUNGRRYYYYYY!" I whined.
"no! bad Noob! Bad! go in time out!" Alex barked.
"AWWWW I always have to go in time out... it's not fair!" I moped.
"Now mister! Don't make me get out the stick...for the tenth time today."
"Eek! No! I'll be good!"
"Good."
And now here I am in time out; tacoless. I guess there's nothing really to do until the gang shows up tomorrow. Boy it'll be good to see them. It's been a few weeks. I wonder if Amy missed me. I wonder if she has a taco... *slaps self* No! Don't start that again.
Anyway, I'm hittin the ol' dusty trail. Night night.

21-Jan-2008 02:15:56 - Last edited on 28-Jan-2008 20:49:40 by FriendshipUI

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