Forums
Crimson
Quick find code: 49-50-252-59241445
Not a throat infection! >_<
Feel better soon!
Mento in diet soda? I don't know about that.
+•,„__„,•+`'``'`+•,„__„,•+`'`Iñ Öùr Héãr†š`'`+•,„__„,•+`'``'`+•,„_
+.,¸¸,.+•`¨¯¯¨`•+.,¸¸,.+•`¨¯Wé Wáñdér tð ƒind¯¨`•+.,¸,.+•`¨¯¯¨`•+.,¸,.+•`¨¯
+.,¸¸,.+•`¨¯¯¨`•+.,¸¸,.+•`+.,¸¸,†hë †rù†h¯¨`•+.,¸,.+•`¨¯¯¨`•+.,¸,.+•`¨¯
Feel better soon!
Mento in diet soda? I don't know about that.
+•,„__„,•+`'``'`+•,„__„,•+`'`Iñ Öùr Héãr†š`'`+•,„__„,•+`'``'`+•,„_
+.,¸¸,.+•`¨¯¯¨`•+.,¸¸,.+•`¨¯Wé Wáñdér tð ƒind¯¨`•+.,¸,.+•`¨¯¯¨`•+.,¸,.+•`¨¯
+.,¸¸,.+•`¨¯¯¨`•+.,¸¸,.+•`+.,¸¸,†hë †rù†h¯¨`•+.,¸,.+•`¨¯¯¨`•+.,¸,.+•`¨¯
The end
is only
the beginning...
23-Mar-2010 06:01:20
niceeee (how the hell do you make your loot?)
speaking of getting stuff im currently aiming for requirments for temple at sennisten so i can use ancient curses (ftw) and ill be able to curse you all to go insane! (unless you already are and ive missed something)
all i need is
64 mining (curse of arrav)
65 smithing (devious minds)
and both of those quests
~insane guys~
~co-leader of teh final judgement~
P.S:
MY ELITE SMILEYS ARE INVINCIBLE!!!!
speaking of getting stuff im currently aiming for requirments for temple at sennisten so i can use ancient curses (ftw) and ill be able to curse you all to go insane! (unless you already are and ive missed something)
all i need is
64 mining (curse of arrav)
65 smithing (devious minds)
and both of those quests
~insane guys~
~co-leader of teh final judgement~
P.S:
MY ELITE SMILEYS ARE INVINCIBLE!!!!
23-Mar-2010 08:24:41 - Last edited on 23-Mar-2010 15:42:36 by Smallay
I've read the first post of this and Wander, you have much to learn about writing. When doing dialogue, you have many errors, such as putting periods at the end of dialogue.
Example: "Talk to the lord with manners>>.<<" he said.
- That period should be a comma, and that is how it should be usually in every dialogue statement when there is a "he said," or "he boomed." Something of that sort.
Also, you write as if it is in the past sense.
Example: Then he walks down the stairs.
- This makes you seem very inexperienced and is usually not recommended.
Finally, the beginning does not draw in my attention, rather, it pushes me away because of the boring beginning. Sometimes setting the scene isn't always the best road.
I hope you read these things and I will continue to read, I hope this lives up to your saying that it is gory and violent. At the moment, it does not live up to it.
EDIT: I have also noticed another thing; when writing ellipsis (...), you can only put three periods, not two. I saw this and I shook my head in frustration after everything else I have seen. Work on the grammar you use for your written works.
Example: "Talk to the lord with manners>>.<<" he said.
- That period should be a comma, and that is how it should be usually in every dialogue statement when there is a "he said," or "he boomed." Something of that sort.
Also, you write as if it is in the past sense.
Example: Then he walks down the stairs.
- This makes you seem very inexperienced and is usually not recommended.
Finally, the beginning does not draw in my attention, rather, it pushes me away because of the boring beginning. Sometimes setting the scene isn't always the best road.
I hope you read these things and I will continue to read, I hope this lives up to your saying that it is gory and violent. At the moment, it does not live up to it.
EDIT: I have also noticed another thing; when writing ellipsis (...), you can only put three periods, not two. I saw this and I shook my head in frustration after everything else I have seen. Work on the grammar you use for your written works.
23-Mar-2010 20:39:56 - Last edited on 23-Mar-2010 20:56:39 by Areno3
Quick find code: 49-50-252-59241445 Back to Top