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~` The Third Wish `~
Savior: (Crying) Ferret! No!
Joe: Savior, you have to admit it's time that the ferret moved on...
Savior: Maybe...
Iceburg: Good job mage, you got crud on all of our pants!
Stupid Mage: It's not my fault we landed in this!
Joe: Whose fault is it then?
Stupid Mage: I don't know.
Iceburg: Then it's your fault!
Stupid Mage: Maybe...
Savior: Hey look! It's the Barbarian Village!
Joe: I remember this place...
Iceburg: I've never been here...
Stupid Mage: Me neither...
Savior: Santa time!
(Puts on Santa hat)
Barbarian 1: Oh, It's the great Santa!
Barbarian 2: No! It's the imposter!
Savior: I have come to say I apologize!
(A Mod appears)
Mod 1: Hey, Savior!
Savior: Its you!
Joe: Hey! You're the one that gave Savior the three wishes!
Mod 1: Yep!
Iceburg: I remember you!
Stupid Mage: I'm going to go train. I'll meet you guys in Falador...
Savior: No one cares!
Stupid Mage: (Cries and Leaves)
Mod 1: Savior! I have come to grant you one more wish!
Savior: XD Remember my last one?
Mod 1: Why did you wish for a squirrel?
Savior: I had my reasons...
Joe and Iceburg:
Mod 1: Anyway, what do you want?
Savior: I want someone to perish!
Mod 1: Okay. It has been done, I suppose.
Savior: Sweet!
Mod 1: I wish you a happy Runescape life.
Barbarian 1: Hey! It's that guy!
Barbarian 3: Kill him for no apparent reason!
(All the barbarians attack Mod 1)
Mod 1: Ahh! (Dies)
Savior: Yum.
Joe:
Stupid Mage: Guys! I’m back!
Iceburg: You left?
Stupid Mage: Yes! I learned a new spell! Watch!
Joe: This could be bad.
Stupid Mage: Mageto Amgeto Buniiosis!
(A Bunny appears)
Savior: Awesome!
Joe and Iceburg:
Joe: What is the point of that spell?
Stupid Mage: To make me feel good? Why? I'm aren't fat!
Savior: That’s my line and your grammar is atrocious.
Stupid Mage: Eh, whatever.
Savior: >.<

06-Jul-2008 20:20:20 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:22:41 by CaptChekaka

~` Mystery Returns `~
Savior: Hey, Joe.
Joe: Yeah?
Savior: Is this a Journey?
Joe: Yeah, but you aren't going to be singing.
Savior: Time for a song!
Iceburg: Are you deaf?
Stupid Mage: Temporary Mute!
Savior: ---------------!
Joe: Heh, good job!
Stupid Mage: Thank you.
Iceburg: Yeah! Quiet time!
Savior: Hahahaha! You thought that that would stop me?
Stupid Mage: How did he do that?
Savior: Simple, this one phrase gives me power...
Joe: What phrase?
Iceburg: Yeah. What phrase?
Savior: "May the Ferrets be with you."
Stupid Mage: Stop with the ferrets!
Savior: Okay!
(An explosion occurs in the distance)
Joe: Huh?
Iceburg: Why is this so familiar?
???: Mwuhahahaha! I have come for thee!
Savior: Again?
Joe: It can't be!
Iceburg: It is!
Mystery: Yes! It is I! Mystery! Prepare to die! Siloncie Gongoli!
Stupid Mage: No!
(Stupid Mage jumps in front and sacrifices himself)
Savior: Ha! Take this Mystery!
Mystery: Huh?
(Savior shoots an arrow at Mystery)
Mystery: Ha! That won't hit me!
Savior: Then take this! (Puts on Santa) Elf Attack!
(Savior shoots novelty toys from his hands, killing Mystery)
Mystery: Argh!
Joe: Nice shot.
Savior: Thanks.
Iceburg: I think we're becoming better!
Joe: Soon we might not be losers anymore!
(Stupid Mage appears)
Stupid Mage: I teleported, from Lumbridge.
Joe: Thanks for the sacrifice; you have earned a place in our group.
Iceburg: How did you get to Lumbridge?
Stupid Mage: The almighty gods must have saved me out of love!
Savior: Can't be true. No one loves you.
Stupid Mage:
Savior: Hey Joe! Guess what?
Joe: (Without turning around) What?
Savior: I moved on from ferrets!
Joe: Good for you.
Savior: I moved to raccoons!
Iceburg and Joe: (They turn and see Savior completely covered in raccoons)
Savior: Ow! They're biting me out of love!

06-Jul-2008 20:20:21 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:22:53 by CaptChekaka

~` Dwarves `~
Savior: Ow...
Joe: See? You shouldn't play with raccoons.
Iceburg: XD
Savior: I think we need to get some armor.
Stupid Mage: We would, but we have no money.
???: Mages and Warriors! Assemble!
Joe: Who's that?
Iceburg: Whoever it is, I don't think they're friendly.
???: I am Striker!
Joe: What do you want?
Striker: Simple. I need the Santa to establish enough power to summon Zamorak!
Savior: Try and get it -- Ouch!
Striker: Ha! Your weakened state can't stand up to me!
Savior: These savage beasts may have ripped off my ears. And torn my fingers off. And eaten my toes. And set fire to my hair, but I have tamed them.
Raccoon: (Any of you guys want Santa Eyeball soup?)
Striker: Huh?
Joe: What do you mean?
Iceburg and Stupid Mage: He didn't. >.>
Savior: Go Raccoons! Attack!
Striker: Ow! They're biting me!
(Striker dies from Raccoon injuries)
Joe: Wow. What's with you and animals?
Savior: I don't know!
Iceburg: Nice job anyway. Hey, look up there! A mine!
Savior: Dwarves live there I think. Let's see if we can buy some armor.
Joe and Iceburg: Okay.
Stupid Mage: I'm going to head to Falador and find some runes. I'll meet you guys there.
Savior: Okay.
(They walk up to the Dwarves)
Joe: Hey! does anyone have any armor we can buy?
Savior: Joe, remember that these are Dwarves. Let me.
Dwarf: Heh?
Savior: We need metal. Strong metal. Sturdy metal. You have?
Dwarf: Yeah, sure, come on.
Iceburg and Joe: >.<
Dwarf: You want some steel armor? Or black?
Savior: We will take black. Three sets.
Dwarf: Okay, that comes to a total of fifty thousand coins.
Iceburg: (Handing sack) Okay, here you go.
Dwarf: Thank you. Have a nice day.
(They leave and begin to go towards Falador)
Savior: Raccoons! Come to me!
(Thousands of raccoons rush Savior)
Savior: Ahh!
Joe: ...
Savior: I -- am -- drowning -- in -- raccoons... (Gurgle)

06-Jul-2008 20:23:27 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:23:05 by CaptChekaka

~` White Knights `~
Joe: You okay Savior?
Savior: Blah.
Iceburg: I think a raccoon bit his tongue. Which will mean he probably has a deadly disease now. (Coughs)
Savior: Blah!
Joe: Hey Iceburg, use your magic to fix his tongue. He’s even more annoying now.
Iceburg: Fine.
(Looks in 'spell book')
Iceburg: Why do I have a cookbook? ... Oh well - Salineto!
Savior: Thanks, Iceburg.
(Striker appears with four other warriors)
Striker: Ha! Thought you were rid of me? I will get that Santa!
Savior: Never!
Joe: Try it.
Iceburg: I’ll take them out... Ugh...
Striker: Lets go!
(Striker pulls out his Dragon Longsword and Iceburg pulls out an Adamant Two-Handed Sword)
Striker: Aha! I have the upper hand!
(Iceburg hits him on top of the head with the dull side)
Striker: Uhh... Cheater...
(Striker is knocked out)
Warrior 1: Uhh... I say we run.
Warrior 3: Yes!
(They run away)
Savior: Hey look! It’s Falador!
Joe: Is that Stupid Mage on the ground?
Iceburg: I think it is!
(They run to Stupid Mage's side)
Savior: Stupid Mage... Are you okay?
Stupid Mage: Uhh... They have the power...
White Knight: You all will suffer a similar fate.
Iceburg: I don’t think so!
Joe: Wait, who's that?
White Knight King: Who are you three?
Savior: We are --
(White Knight King kicks Savior in the jewels)
Savior: (High-pitched voice) Ow... (Falls over)
White Knight King: Mwuhahahaha! I am the baddest SOB in Gielinor.
White knight: Sir, they have black armor.
White Knight King: Is this true?
Joe: We do! Why?
Savior: And why did you kick me?
(White Knight King kicked Savior in the face)
Savior: Ahh! You kicking me in my face while wearing that heavy armor is not probable! But it hurts! A lot! (Falls Over)
Joe: We will just take our friends and go ok?
White Knight King: Good... Now leave!
Savior: You guys have to drag me. I can't get up.
Joe: Ugh... Fine.

06-Jul-2008 20:23:28 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:23:17 by CaptChekaka

~` Taverly `~
Savior: Man, I won't be able to walk straight for a long time.
Joe: Somehow... I feel as though you deserved this.
Savior: What?
Iceburg: He's kidding Savior.
Savior: Oh. I knew that.
Stupid Mage: Sure you did.
Savior: I did!
Joe: I believe you.
Savior: But you don't matter!
Iceburg: XD
Joe: Ouch. That hurt.
Savior: ...
Mystery: I'm Back!
Savior: Great... another weirdo.
Mystery: What did you say ferret boy?
Savior: For your in-for-mation! I moved on the raccoons!
Mystery: You're still an idiot!
Joe: Don't say that!
Iceburg: (To himself) Even though it is true...
Savior: Santa ho!
Mystery: Not again.
Savior: Snowflake Drizzle!
Mystery: Argh!
(Mystery turned to ice)
Stupid Mage: Is it just me or are we getting stronger?
Joe: I think it's you.
Savior: Hey look!
Joe: Huh?
Iceburg: Those are called Druids, Savior, they -- Where'd he go?
Savior: (To Druid) Why are you guys so fat? I'm mean, those white gowns certainly do not compliment your enormous figure. I mean, a hippo wearing a turtleneck looks better. So, why?
Joe: Imbecile…
Savior: What? It*s a perfectly logical question.
Druid: Salimeinte!
(An explosion occurs)
Savior: Ahh!
(Savior flies away)
Joe: Great, now we have to go find him.
Savior: (From a distance) I'm okay! A few broken bones but okay! Wait -- No raccoon -- Bad -- Don't growl -- Don't get mad, get -- Ahh!
Joe: Great. What a loser.
Stupid Mage: Does he always get himself in trouble?
Iceburg: Ever since I met him.
Joe: Same here.
(Nooblet appears)
Nooblet: Hey! It's you guys!
Iceburg: What do you want?
Nooblet: Nothing.
(Nooblet walks away)
Joe: We better go find Savi--
Savior: (From distance) Ahh! Help! I need medical assistance! Military! Raccoons are everywhere! How do they have knives? Gah! It hurts! A lot!
Joe: ...

06-Jul-2008 20:23:29 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:23:49 by CaptChekaka

06-Jul-2008 20:23:31 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:24:04 by CaptChekaka

~` White Wolf Mountain `~
Savior: So how far away are the gnomes?
Joe: Actually quite far.
Iceburg: Yeah...
Joe: What's wrong?
Iceburg: Well, the mage is gone. If we had him we could teleport.
Savior: Good point.
Joe: Come on. We can walk! We need the exercise!
Savior: Why? What? I’m not fat!
Iceburg: You’re an idiot.
Savior: Says you!
Joe: Actually says everyone.
Savior: Well I listen to Santa's law and he is fat!
Joe: Yeah... So?
Savior: Why do you think he uses a sleigh? He hates walking!
Iceburg and Joe:
Savior: What?
High-level person: I've finally caught up to you...
Savior: No! I don’t have my ferrets this time!
High-level person: Hahahaha! Nor do you have your Santa!
Savior: So?
High-level person: Hahahaha! I’m going to teleport you all!
Savior: No! (To himself) Yes! I won't have to walk! Santa's laziness trumps Joe's logic every time.
High-level person: Telodimito!
(They are all teleported to the center of White Wolf Mountain)
Savior: Sweet.
Joe: No, bad.
Iceburg: Yeah, very bad.
Savior: Why? That cut off a bunch of our walking!
Joe: Yes, but the wolves could bite our legs off and force us to crawl!
Savior:
Iceburg: Yeah…
Wolf: Bark – Bark – Growl!
Savior: Ahh!
Joe: It hasn’t attacked you yet.
Savior: I’m practicing.
Iceburg: Why?
Savior: For this.
(Wolf jumps on Savior)
Savior: Ahh! See?
(Wolf bites Savior for a while, then walks off)
Joe: Hey look! It left!
Iceburg:
Savior: What?
Joe: ...
Savior: What?
Iceburg: Your face is kind of of mangled.
Savior: No!
Joe: Actually I think it’s an improvement.
Savior: That’s mean.
Iceburg: Anyway, we should move on to Catherby.
Joe: Yeah. It’s not far from here.
Savior: To Catherby!

06-Jul-2008 20:23:38 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:24:15 by CaptChekaka

~` Catherby `~
Savior: Ow…
Joe: Stop complaining.
Iceburg: Please!
Savior: Fine…
Iceburg: Hey look! a shortcut to Catherby!
Savior: Yes!
Joe: Wait!
(Savior runs to the shortcut but falls down the hill into some sharp rocks)
Savior: Argh!
Joe:
Iceburg: Wow... we told him to wait...
Savior: You guys want to come help me?
(They go and help him and after many bandages, continue on)
Savior: I look like a mummy!
Joe: … No!
Iceburg: Idiot.
Savior: Ahh, at least the warm sea air is quite helpful.
Fisherman 1: Ahh! A mummy! Take all the fish!
(Runs away)
Savior: Sweet! Fish!
(Savior eats a fish)
Savior: A little... Umm... Wet.
Joe and Iceburg: It was alive?
Savior: I hope so...
Joe: What?
Savior: I mean not!
Random Noob: Ahh! A mummy! Push him in the water!
Fisherman 2: Why?
Random Noob: I heard mummies can** swim!
(Random Noob turns quickly and winks at the hiding Mystery and Striker)
Fisherman 3: Let’s do it!
(They all push Savior into the shark filled waters)
Savior: Oh, now I’m all wet...
Joe: I suggest you get out of the water.
(Savior climbs out but the crowd pushes him back in)
Savior: Why does everyone have this sick obsession with pushing a helpless stranger into cold water continuously?
(Savior notices a fin sticking out of the water)
Savior: Ahh!
(Savior jumps out of the water and his bandages leak off)
Crowd: He’s not a mummy!
Random Noob: Oh, my bad.
Crowd: Get the liar! Argh!
Random Noob: Wait!
Crowd: Why?
Random Noob: Aren't we all just liars in this huge world of life? We should respect one another and treat them with respect. For haven't we all lied at one point or another in our life? I say we chase that mummy impersonator out!
Joe:
Crowd Leader: Erm...
Savior: I'm seriously getting bored with Catherby.
Crowd: Get both the philosophical liar and the mummy impersonator!
Savior and Random Noob:

06-Jul-2008 20:23:38 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:24:36 by CaptChekaka

~` Stupid Mage Returns `~
Joe: Wow... Catherby was lame.
Iceburg: You said it!
Savior: (Munch)
Joe: Are you eating something?
Savior: (Mouth full) Nokl!
Iceburg: Nokl?
Joe: That means yes...
Savior: (Pointing) Nokl! Nokl!
Joe: Huh?
Iceburg: Charades?
Savior: ...
Joe: Okay...
Savior: Nokl!
(Joe turns)
???: Why didn't you guys wait for me?
Iceburg: Oh! It's stupid mage!
Savior: (Swallowing) That's what I said!
Joe: How does "Nokl" means Stupid Mage?
Stupid Mage: What?
Iceburg: Long story.
Savior: No it isn't! It was only like a minute!
Iceburg: I said long story!
Stupid Mage: Never mind.
Joe: What were you eating Savior?
Savior: Nothing; and to make things clear -- I was not eating lobster.
Iceburg: Where did you get Lobster?
Savior: Didn't I just say I didn't eat it?
Stupid Mage: You said it sarcastically...
Savior: No, I didn't! What's your problem? You think I'm fat or something?
Joe: You will be if you keep eating Lobster.
Iceburg: Heh.
Stupid Mage: So what happened with Striker and Mystery?
Savior: (Sobbing) They took my Santa!
(Suddenly, out of nowhere, the chef from Tutorial Isle appears)
Chef: Would you like to cook?
Savior: No, now get out of here!
Chef: Aww. I-a feel-a sad-a... again-a.
Joe: Get over it.
Chef: Don't make me grill your jewels off!
Iceburg: What?
(Suddenly, Mod 2 appears)
Mod 2: That's it chef! Time for rehab!
Chef: I don't want to go!
Mod 2: You didn't take your meds! Time for rehab!
Chef: Argh!
(Mod 2 drags Chef away)
Savior: Okay…
Iceburg: Weird…
Stupid Mage: Yet somehow... Funny
Joe: No, just weird.
Savior: Hey look! A Castle like the one from Lumbridge, Joe!
Joe: Umm, okay?

06-Jul-2008 20:25:04 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:25:05 by CaptChekaka

~` Camelot Castle `~
Savior: Hopefully we won't get thrown out of the castle like back at Lumbridge.
Joe: Yeah.
Savior: (Cough) Joe's fault. (Cough)
Iceburg: What do you mean it was Joe's fault?
Stupid Mage: Yeah what did Joe do?
Savior: He wouldn't share his ice cream!
Iceburg and Stupid Mage:
(They walk up to the castle gates)
Savior: Cool.
Stupid Mage: Sweet!
Iceburg: Shut up, you two.
Castle Knight 1: What is your business here?
Savior: We want to go see the king.
Castle Knight 2: None may enter.
Person who will be known in two seconds (AKA - ???): Who are these travelers?
Castle Knight 1: We are telling them to leave as you speak, sire.
King: Tell them that if they do not leave... We will release the evil, man-eating ladybugs!
Castle Knight 2: Ladybugs, sire?
King: Yes!
Iceburg: Well...
Savior: Hahahaha! this guy is dumber-er-er-er than me!
Joe: ...
Stupid Mage: Well, King, what if we don't want to go?
King: Then suffer the wrath of the ladybugs!
Savior: Hahahaha! Vicious raccoons have attacked us! Ladybugs don't scare us!
King: Release the hoard!
Joe: Heh?
(Joe sees tens of thousands ladybugs flying at them)
Joe: Oh... Not good.
Iceburg: Run away slowly.
(Iceburg and Joe run away)
Savior: That is a physical impossibility and we are not afraid of bugs! Right, Stupid Mage?
(Savior looks and sees that Stupid Mage ran away)
Savior: Ahh, shoot. (To King) Yeah…
King: Die infidel!
Savior: Ahh!
(The ladybugs attack Savior)
Savior: Ahh! They are getting in my raccoon wounds!
(Savior runs away)
King: Yet another one to fall before the ladybug power...

06-Jul-2008 20:25:05 - Last edited on 06-Jul-2008 22:25:50 by CaptChekaka