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Averia Light

Averia Light

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saddha said :
Averia Light said :
I appreciate it, I do, but I can't implement parenting techniques. I just need to know the risks, but I can't find anything like, say, the statistics on autistic kids hurting babies. All I get are forums that don't link to anything credible.

Credible: Check the links on this page. They lead to academic source texts.
Statistics: Can be falsified. No guarantee what so ever

I'm not trying to complain, but the sources provided are parenting guidance. I can't parent this kid 4 days out of the month and expect it to work. I can talk to the parents, which is the next step, but I wanted to know if my fears are rational or not before doing so. And I swear I'm not going to let her know all the pain I have known

03-Jun-2017 15:09:03

Averia Light

Averia Light

Posts: 28,508 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
saddha said :
Averia Light said :
And the same type of /r/advice. I'm really looking for some statistics. Why don't they exist? They seem to exist for every other topic ever.

I know there are a few on the autistic spectrum here, which I was kind of hoping would have better information.

You might want to forward this question to:

Robert Koegel
University of California, Sant... , Santa Barbara
Behavioural Science, Educational Psychology, Developmental Psychology
Ph.D.

Thanks! And I swear I'm not going to let her know all the pain I have known

03-Jun-2017 15:10:49

saddha

saddha

Posts: 4,181 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Averia Light said :
saddha said :
Averia Light said :
I appreciate it, I do, but I can't implement parenting techniques. I just need to know the risks, but I can't find anything like, say, the statistics on autistic kids hurting babies. All I get are forums that don't link to anything credible.

Credible: Check the links on this page. They lead to academic source texts.
Statistics: Can be falsified. No guarantee what so ever

I'm not trying to complain, but the sources provided are parenting guidance. I can't parent this kid 4 days out of the month and expect it to work. I can talk to the parents, which is the next step, but I wanted to know if my fears are rational or not before doing so.

Oh no, I know. :)

Hmmm.. did you take a peek at the References of those academic studies?

http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/109830070100300105
http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.2511/rpsd.23.2.111

You fear is rational, as a mother your protection instinct comes through. Did the person in question show abusive behavior in the past? If not then the chances that it will harm your newborn are slim. Burgers anyone?
Om amideva hrih

03-Jun-2017 15:21:15

Averia Light

Averia Light

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I have not, tbh, but I will.

And, no, not all mommy fears are rational. For instance, I was really thinking about getting rid of my cats, because of the fear of them smothering my kid. After research, such cases are extremely rare and the wivestale actually evolved from the idea that cats were once considered evil. Of course, they recommend that you keep the cats out of the nursury, but that is for the same reason why you dont put anything in the crib, including blankets. Most cats actually don't want to be around what they consider a loud, unpredictable and smelly hooman.

Actually, there are a lot of common wivestales that just are not true but strike fear into the hearts of moms everywhere.

Anyway, the kid does have aggressive episodes. They are very sudden and sometimes even the parent is guessing at why it happened. Usually, the caregivers get a lot of the aggression, but I can't help to wonder if the sudden noise of a baby crying, or anything new related to a baby, will be a trigger and if he will go after her. Do they make that jump in logic? Do they realize that it is a kid and does that matter? Where are the studies on this?

When I google, I get parenting advice or how to tell if my kid has autism. And, I have read through many 'understanding autism' books and sites and, yes it helps me understand why they act out and how they act out (and parenting strategies to deal with it), but they don't get into the nitty gritty of how likely it is to occur and, particularly with newborns, they lack studies that show if they are or are not a threat to them. I mean they aren't sociopaths, but sound is a trigger. Is the sound enough of a trigger to hurt someone smaller than them? I mean, studies show that people have a hard time hurting something defenseless, but does that carry over to autistic kids facing the cause of their trigger? And I swear I'm not going to let her know all the pain I have known

03-Jun-2017 16:25:45 - Last edited on 03-Jun-2017 16:30:22 by Averia Light

Averia Light

Averia Light

Posts: 28,508 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
I can accept that, but how do you know?

I am willing to accept the idea that I am being irrational, since I know many people have irrational fears of mental problems, but the aggressive behavior has me a bit scared. Plus, my house is a new environment to which I will add a common trigger for autistic kids, which is sudden, shrieking, loud noises.

Idk, maybe I'm just more frustrated that I just cant find anything on this...and why can't I? There is no way that I am the first person in the world to think of such things. And I swear I'm not going to let her know all the pain I have known

03-Jun-2017 16:36:31 - Last edited on 03-Jun-2017 16:42:42 by Averia Light

Team Skull
Aug Member 2008

Team Skull

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Averia Light said :
Sorry, I was waiting for Beast to post but anyone can answer.

Can you tell me more about aggressive autistic behavior? Like, what are triggers and should I, as a 39 week pregnant person, be scared of it?

Oh, sorry.

Triggers are what it says on the tin: Stimuli that "encourage" someone on the spectrum to have a emotional meltdown. This can range from certain noises, to textures, to words, and even actions.

You'll notice from time to time that they might be doing something like tapping a finger onto a desk. That is most likely what is known as "Stimming", or an action that the autistic person is using to curb their meltdown episodes (it's innate, they can't control it (at least, not easily)).

Unless the stimming is harmful (like self-mutilation): DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT TRY TO FORCEFULLY STOP IT. It will more than likely cause an aggressive episode. A lot of the time, they are oblivious to the fact they are stimming.

A lot of the parenting techniques are bullshit- they account only for neurotypical kids. IF you tried half the stuff they suggest with an autistic child, you would more than likely be met with a fist, or worse.

Basically, if you want to "control" an autistic child:

1- keep them away from the "triggers" as best as you humanly can.

2- Assuming you can not, and if you see them stimming, don't try to stop it unless it is harmful to themselves or others

3- IF they do act out, SPEAK CALMLY. Yelling at them will more than likely only cause them to get that much more aggressive as you're exacerbating the trigger.

4- After you locate the cause of the meltdown, teach them how they can better cope with it in the future (or have their parents can, if you can not).

As far as being afraid, I'd only ever be afraid if they get violent. Otherwise, it's merely a speedbump. "Revenge...is like a rolling stone, which, when a man hath forced up a hill, will return upon him with a greater violence, and break those bones whose sinews gave it motion."- Jeremy Taylor

03-Jun-2017 18:45:49

Averia Light

Averia Light

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Cool, thanks. I'll look into stemming. I think I saw my cousin do that when he kind of flapped his hands rapidly and made like a unique humming sound. Didn't know that is what that was.

And, his episodes can turn violent, but so far, the violence is only towards the well, idk what to call them...the closest thing to a set of parents that exists over here. The only thing I am concerned about, really, is my newborn, and all her noises and stuff, acting as a trigger. I can definitely take him on if need be, but, I mean, would he make the jump to attacking a newborn? Is that a huge jump in an autistic child's mind? I mean, the idea of hurting a defenseless being is still a sick and horrid thought to an autistic kid, right? (Not trying to alienate, but idk) And I swear I'm not going to let her know all the pain I have known

03-Jun-2017 19:21:22

Team Skull
Aug Member 2008

Team Skull

Posts: 24,511 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Averia Light said :
Cool, thanks. I'll look into stemming. I think I saw my cousin do that when he kind of flapped his hands rapidly and made like a unique humming sound. Didn't know that is what that was.

Yea, that sounds like typical stimming behavior of an autistic child. Personally speaking, my stimming is perseveration (In other words, I repeat myself. A lot.). Just...whatever you do, don't comment on it to them. As I said, they're more often than not oblivious to the fact they're even doing it, and it may or may not make them very self-conscious.

Averia Light said :

would he make the jump to attacking a newborn? Is that a huge jump in an autistic child's mind? I mean, the idea of hurting a defenseless being is still a sick and horrid thought to an autistic kid, right? (Not trying to alienate, but idk)

That...is a difficult question to answer.

The thing about ASD is: They can still feel, communicate, etc. It's more of...their communication style is...different.

I mean, alexithymia (or the lack of being able to express outright emotion) has some level of comorbidity with ASD, although they still have all of their mental faculties to process emotion intact.

Whereas "normal" people would be able to say they're upset, often times the only way you would be able to tell if an autistic child is upset is...well...when they start yelling.

Anywho, that's a bit of out-loud thinking, so back to the main answer:

If I had to give a concrete answer: Unless they also happen to have ASPD, I would say it would be extremely unlikely for an autistic child to intentionally hurt a newborn child, even if they have an emotional meltdown. I mean, I would try to keep anything both throwable and breakable away from the infant's quarters to prevent inadvertent harm, but I would like to think the child would not literally try to go into the infant's crib and physically attack her. "Revenge...is like a rolling stone, which, when a man hath forced up a hill, will return upon him with a greater violence, and break those bones whose sinews gave it motion."- Jeremy Taylor

04-Jun-2017 07:30:33

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