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Legionnaire

Legionnaire

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Spreaking of writing a story.A very short story I wrote in study hall last week and this time I didn't leave any words out, hopefully *sighs*. I hope you like it. Time4Rants RIP Never Forget! 2010-2013, In Memory of Old Timer: ""I'm a doctor, not a spiritual medium!" RIP ;(
Shy Lego 2010-2011 RIP
,
Lego x LD= Forbidden Love. Legita=Forbidden Love

09-Sep-2010 22:12:55

Azigarath

Azigarath

Posts: 9,271 Rune Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
oh, i remember this
hey Logan, seafloor is another spelling of seabed, at least in Canada, so it doesnt need to be 2 words.
also, realising is not misspelt, that's how it is in Canada.
not that it matters, but in the future you could mention which style/type/form of English youd be using for grading :)

09-Sep-2010 22:58:28

Logan Shafts
Dec Member 2023

Logan Shafts

Posts: 3,211 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
DragoonRnger:
I’m glad to hear you’ve been working on it.
While I think that proofreading is important, it’s even more important to take things slowly and write it correctly the first time. That way when you proofread, it’ll be more of a way to make sure you did it right in the first place, rather than a kind of ‘remake’ of the story.
As far as description is concerned, there are a few things I can point out:
One is that you tend to write in the present tense a lot.
In my opinion that makes the story seem more like a script for actors than a story (especially if you’re using third person present tense).
I personally always stick to past tense, unless circumstances in the story especially call for present tense.
Also, when you’re describing a character or object, try to imagine them in your head and simply write what you see.
Also, when you write a description, try to be precise and use terms which mean the same thing universally.
For instance, you write, at the beginning of your story: “A medium height man” – What exactly does this tell the reader? It would depend on their perspective. For me, ‘medium height’ means about 5 foot.
But I stand at 6 foot. For somebody that is 5 foot themselves, ‘medium height’ might have a completely different meaning.
You might also focus on environment more, instead of just verbs. Like instead of only explaining what your character is thinking, saying, or doing, you might occasionally throw something in about the sky, what time of day it is, the road/walkway etc that the character is on, or anything else really that you feel like thinking up.
Just try to do it subtly and don’t be invasive, so that the reader can take it in and add it to their mental picture without having to rethink what is going on.
I look forward to reading more of your work. =]

10-Sep-2010 01:38:37

Logan Shafts
Dec Member 2023

Logan Shafts

Posts: 3,211 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Crocefisso:
Thanks for the support, it is duly noted.

Azigarath:
Ah, sorry. I am from the U.S, and I often forget that people spell English words differently in other parts of the world, haha.
So you know, small typo's arent reflected in your stories score, they're just listed for the sake of edification.
Even so, I’ll try to keep it in mind next time I grade a contest.

10-Sep-2010 01:40:07 - Last edited on 10-Sep-2010 01:44:13 by Logan Shafts

Logan Shafts
Dec Member 2023

Logan Shafts

Posts: 3,211 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Bob Giligand:
While you can be assured that I read every story posted here, regrettably I simply don’t have time to review every single one.
This is why I’m looking for some people with a high standard of writing ability to become Editors; hopefully they will be helpful in enhancing the utility of this thread.

10-Sep-2010 01:42:42

Logan Shafts
Dec Member 2023

Logan Shafts

Posts: 3,211 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Here are the details of the next short story contest!
Current contest theme: The Shortest Story Contest! (This isn’t exactly a theme, I know. You can write about whatever you like, just remember brevity is key.)
Current contest deadline: October 1st (Note that this may be changed on account of my erratic schedule).
Current contest rules:
1. The story must be less than 2 posts long.
2. It must be made specifically for this thread, and not ripped off of an older thread. But you can post it anywhere you please after the deadline.
3. Your story may be RuneScape related, or based on a real-life scenario/object. Please do not write about any other games though, or books/stories.
4. It must adhere to the regular rules of this thread, as well as the RuneScape Rules of Conduct.
5. It must be submitted before the deadline. It must not be edited after the deadline.
6. Each participant is agreeing to respect other participant’s stories.
7. Each participant must accept that I will be reviewing each story and I WILL point out errors in them - if you're not okay with this, don't submit your story.
8. Most of all, each participant is agreeing to do their best to have FUN and enjoy this experience.
Current contest reward: At-least a week’s time posting of your story on the first page of this thread, and a listing of your name in the ‘contest winners’ post. You will also know that you’re PWNTASTICAL. =]
I will also happily lend my Red H’ween Mask or Santa Hat to the winner in game, should they ask.
Note: I would like to make sure every participant is aware that I am not binding myself to any judging date for a reason.
The last contest took me over 2 months to judge.
Hopefully this one will be better, but I can’t promise anything.
So by participating, you are acknowledging that grading may take a very long time, and that you’re okay with that.

10-Sep-2010 02:43:34 - Last edited on 10-Sep-2010 02:46:47 by Logan Shafts

Logan Shafts
Dec Member 2023

Logan Shafts

Posts: 3,211 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
These are the things which I will be reviewing you on. Be aware that I may add or remove anything to this rubric inductively as I judge.
Brevity: 0/30
When writing, remember that you must still convey your point. Simply writing a tiny story with no meaning won’t win you this contest. The point is to make it short, without sacrificing quality.
Description: 0/15
Make sure your work is thorough and presents a clean image, even if you are brief about it.
Grammar: 0/15
This includes your spelling, vocabulary usage, and structure. Use a spell checker if you like, as that will inevitably increase your score in this area.
I expect quality in this area, as your stories will be short, and thus shouldn’t take much effort to proofread.
Plot: 0/10
Be aware that this is a fairly good chunk of the total grade, and you should do a lot of thinking regarding the way your story will play out to the end.
Total grade: 0/70
The story with the highest score in this area will win the contest. If the highest score is tied between two stories, the authors of those stories will be given 2 days to revise their stories and re-post them. I will then re-review them, and the winner will be chosen.
Also, I'd like to encourage everybody. Even if you don't think your story is very good, Post it!
If you later decide to change it, or post another entry (before the deadline), that is perfectly acceptable.
But if you post it, you can get feedback (though not from me, as that would be unfair because I am the judge), and thus improve it before the date.
Also, everybody enjoys writing, and hopefully most of you enjoy reading - thus I hope you will share your stories with us all. =]
Also, I'd like to thank everybody who is, or will be, participating in this contest. I hope it will help everybody out, and be a good method of bringing different authors together for the sake of community involvement.

10-Sep-2010 02:44:35 - Last edited on 10-Sep-2010 02:46:06 by Logan Shafts

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