RuneScape Forum Archive | -= The Revolt Lover Series =-

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Base4:I'd like to read this story sometime.
(c)Mr. Happy:Well, I lost it.
This wasnt going as well as he had thought.
(c)Mr. Happy:But anyway, it made me think
Mr. Happy:Maybe that story is us.
Base4:What?
Mr. Happy:Um...maybe we are a story
How had Cheezit92 said it?
Mr. Happy:Maybe someone is writing us
That was it.
Base4:Interesting.
(c)Mr. Happy:Yea, and our lives are already panned out.
(c)Mr. Happy:I mean planned.
Someone was walking towards the garden in which they sat from the ranging guild now.
Base4:Like a higher level of reality
Mr. Happy:Exactly.
Base4:Wouldn't it be interesting if we could meet the author?
Mr. Happy:Lol
The man who had been walking towards them took a seat on the bench besides theirs. His whole posture was relaxed and languid and he wore full red dragonhide like Base4's.
Base4:Hello
Qazwsx3740:Hi
Base4:I haven't seen you around here before
Qazwsx3740:Well I'm the author of this story
Base4:Lol, did you overhear us?
Qazwsx3740:No, it's true
Qazwsx3740:Im from a whole different level of reality
Was this guy hitting on Base4? Another Xanadian asking Base4 to the dance? Trying to impress her? Mr. Happy suddenly realized that he didn't want this guy to court Base4, that he might want Base4 to go to the dance with him.
Base4:You overheard us
Qazwsx3740:No, I write us
Mr. Happy:Excuse me Qaz
Qazwsx3740:?
Mr. Happy:I dont think Base4 wants to go to the dance with you
Qazwsx3740:What?
Mr. Happy:Can I talk to you in the shed over there?
He gestured towards the shed.
Qazwsx3740:Uh sure...
(c)Mr. Happy got up and Qazwsx3740 followed him into the shed. Base4 waited, listening intently to the still air. Suddenly the sound of a fletching knife being drawn came from within the shed along with a muffled shout. She stood up, worried, and walked over to the shed to try and see what was happening, but before she reached the building, the door opened and Mr. Happy stepped out wiping a fletching knife on his clothes.

27-May-2006 19:33:06 - Last edited on 27-May-2006 19:34:14 by Azure Sunday

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Mr. Happy:Bet he didnt write that
Base4:Lol.
They retreated back to the bench.
Base4:I've been thinking
Base4:With this dance coming up.
Base4:I'm always under pressure when I choose someone
Base4:The way it is with the revolt lovers and zezimanites.
Base4:But you...
Base4:You haven't chosen a side yet.
(c)Mr. Happy:Well...
Should he tell her that he was with the Zezimanites? But she kept on talking, and his moment to confess passed.
Base4:Would you mind me choosing you for my partner?
Mr. Happy:What about Wolf0122?
Base4:Wolf0122?
Mr. Happy:Yea, you said you'd think about going with him.
The flowers were dancing again to what might have been a tango by the look of them.
Base4:Was that what he was saying?
Mr. Happy:I think so
Base4:That's also a nice thing about you
Base4:You're speech is simple yet sophisticated.
Base4:Like your name.
Base4:So many Xanadians continually try to impress me
Base4:With their expansive vocabularies
Base4:But that got boring long ago.
(c)Mr. Happy

Base4:See?
Base4:Someone Xanadian would have said
Base4:I deem your articulation appropriate
Base4

r something weird like that.
Base4:I like the 'O' better.
(c)Mr. Happy

=)
Base4:Lol
Mr. Happy'* eyes picked out the squat building once more, and he decided that now might be the time to ask a question that he had wanted to know the answer to for a long time.
(c)Mr. Happy:By the way, what is that building over there?
Base4:?
Mr. Happy pointed at the flat, wide structure that looked more like a box than a building.
Base4

, thats the testing building.
Base4:Not a very nice place.
She grimaced.
(c)Mr. Happy:Testing?
Base4:Yea, they use it to test new attacks on actual players.
(c)Mr. Happy:You mean on Xanadians?
Base4:No, noobs and sometimes elitists.
Base4

r at least that's what I've heard.
Base4:I don't know where they get them.
(c)Mr. Happy:Why don't they just train on creatures?
Base4:I think they're mostly testing effects on prayer and armor.

27-May-2006 19:35:15 - Last edited on 27-May-2006 19:36:26 by Azure Sunday

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Base4:They've discovered some ways to raise noobs' prayer in the prayer building
Mr. Happy:Really
Now that he had discovered what the building was for, he was even more intrigued by it. What new techniques to employ on Cheezit92 could he discover there?
Mr. Happy:That's interesting.
Base4:It's sick, really
Base4:But I guess it could be essential to save lives in battle...
Or for furthering torture techniques.
(c)Mr. Happy thought. Suddenly Base4 stood up.
Base4:Wow, we've been here a while.
(c)Mr. Happy:Yea
Base4:I need to go
Base4:There's a ranarr phylum I'm trying to classify
Base4:Would you like to come to the herblore guild?
Mr. Happy:Sure
Mr. Happy

...actually I think I have a meeting
Base4

yea, is it at the mage guild?
Mr. Happy:Maybe
Mr. Happy:It's with Decaprio
Base4

ecaprio!?
Base4:Wow, that would not be at the mage guild then, lol
Base4:You'd want to go to the presidential building in central Xanadu
Base4:You'll have to tell me how that turns out!
Mr. Happy

k
Base4:Well, I'll be off.
(c)Mr. Happy watched as Base4 walked off into the distance. He also watched as an old man came flying out of a tree and did a few loops around Xanadu before diving into the lake. Then the flowers beside him caught fire and he decided it was time to leave.

27-May-2006 19:36:56 - Last edited on 27-May-2006 19:37:34 by Azure Sunday

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

54 - Attack of The Noobs

As long as the world shall last there will be wrongs, and if no man objected and no man rebelled, those wrongs would last forever.
-Clarence Darrow

Stiff rock pushed at his feet. A Kharil crossbow wedged itself into his hand. The wind blew about him, bringing in the rustles and crunches of the noob armys attempt at stealth.
Zezima stood on the wall encircling Lumbridge castle, near one of the guard towers that loomed to either side of the road into the castles grounds. Below, elitists had constructed a sturdy, spiky wooden barricade across the road to stop the noobs from gaining easy access to the grounds. Most of the walls had also been covered with spiked spikes, and the spike-filled pits dug around the castle walls and into the street before the barricade were set and ready to go. In the darkness the noobs wouldn't even notice the traps until it was too late.
What were the noobs doing? It was truly dark. Low-hanging clouds had been gathering in the sky all evening, and now they blanketed it. The light that penetrated this barrier was only enough to distinguish the outline of the Lumbridge river by, and even that was a shadow amongst shadows. From somewhere below, an immature exclamation floated up on the soughing winds. From somewhere to the east a brief burst of thunder sounded. Zezima tucked his crossbow beneath his arm and rubbed his hands together. The wind had an icy touch to it.
Fires were moving about below, a safe distance from the castle. Were they using torches? Zezima guessed they were, there were many of them, all out of arrow range. Wasn't this supposed to be a surprise attack though?
Something buzzed out of the blackness and hit the elitist to the left Zezima in the arm, registering one damage. Another abject shot between them and whirred off into the castle grounds. Suddenly the night was full of arrows, most bouncing harmlessly from the outer walls but many finding targets.

27-May-2006 19:38:51 - Last edited on 27-May-2006 19:39:49 by Azure Sunday

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Zezima had ducked instinctively at the first one, and now moved to a place on the wall where the arrows were less dense. He peered over.
Below, the ground was teeming with the movement of noobs (C)running frantically about under cover of a line of their archers that had been set up a few paces from the Lumbridge walls and fired volley after volley up into the night. Zezima was amused to see that many of the arrows didnt even make it up onto the Lumbridge parapets but instead fell down onto the noobs closer to the walls. Were they attempting to climb the walls? You never knew with noobs.
The people with torches were now closer to the castle, perhaps twenty of them heading towards the barricade. As Zezima watched three or four of them disappeared from sight as they suddenly fell into the spike pits.
He drew his crossbow, and quickly sniped off three or four more of the fire carriers before they were out of range, then he concentrated on the hordes below. Fire flashed and magic flared through the night as mages on the Lumbridge battlements now turned their fire on the noob armies. Below, screams filled the night as flowers of destruction blossomed amongst the noobs, tearing bodies, freezing limbs and boiling blood. Light from the mage attacks was all that illuminated the nights darkness, pools of ethereal color circling Lumbridge, flashing sporadically. Elitist archers picked their targets carefully in this flickering light, taking down a noob with almost every arrow.
Still the noobs came, running up to the walls through the surrounding carnage, and Zezima suddenly realized there were too few noobs at the castle walls to account for all that had rushed up to them. Turning around he looked down into the Lumbridge grounds to see it in turmoil. Noobs seemed to be flowing into the courtyard through the walls. Shouts of 'Noobs in the courtyard!' floated up to him, along with 'They've dug under the walls!.'

27-May-2006 19:40:32 - Last edited on 27-May-2006 19:40:41 by Azure Sunday

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

He watched long enough to see an elitist trampled into the ground by a pack of rampaging noobs before a nearby thump drew his attention back to the battlements. A dagger sped out of the darkness to his left and he brought up his Kharil crossbow like a shield just in time to catch the shaft of the blade upon it and cause it to ric(L)ochet off to the right.
Kicking blindly in the direction of the attacker, he felt his foot connect with something, producing a crunch, and immediately followed it with a bolt to where his foe should have been.
The sounds of breaking glass cut through the chaotic melody of the battle as his opponent fell onto the hard rock, and lay there unmoving. Had the noobs already gained the wall? He tried to look further down the ramparts but darkness obscured his vision. As far as he could see there were no other people anywhere in his vicinity. He cursed himself for not bringing a bullseye lantern along with him.
Looking back out onto the battlefield around the castle he saw that the noobs near the walls had thinned out considerably, most hanging back with the archers now or running towards the entrance to the grounds. Had they broken through the barrier?
Shooting a few final arrows down at the noobs still near the wall, he broke into a run towards the nearest watchtower, jumping over the occasional body. To his relief he passed several elitist archers and mages along the way who were still busily dispersing death into the crowds below. Opening a door that let him into the watch tower, he leaped down the ladder which led to the ground floor and hurtled out a nearby door to find himself in the courtyard.
Close by, the barricade roared with flame that leapt high into the starless sky.

27-May-2006 19:41:26

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Not enough of it had burned to let any noobs through yet, but on the other side of the flames, out of arrow range, could be seen a large crowd of noobs, waiting. Elitist mages were attending the fire but their efforts only seemed to increase its ferocity, making it burn higher and brighter. Zezima turned from this scene to the more pressing matter of the noobs that had come in under the wall. The courtyard was alive with battle, illuminated by the burning barrier, damage flashing wildly all around and bodies from both sides carpeting the floor.
Elitists had the advantage however, for they still held the Lumbridge castle and a stream of far-range attacks from the castles fortifications bestowed heavy damage upon the noobs in the courtyard. Where had the noobs come through the wall? That was what the elitists needed to find.
Zezima tried to call out to nearby members of his army but, as expected, his voice still didnt work. A few quick gestures produced no effect either. Everyone else was too absorbed in battle. For the umpteenth time he cursed the mods and started off along the castle walls, stumbling over disturbingly malleable objects in the spots where light did not penetrate.
But a round along the walls produced no tunnels leading into Lumbridge, no streams of incoming noobs. If there had ever been a tunnel it had already been filled in again.
By the time he came back to the barrier the courtyard had once again been secured by the elitists, the archers of whom were now standing poised, arrows drawn, behind the blockade which was in its final stages of incineration. Solitary fights were still occurring upon the outer Lumbridge walls, evident by the occasional bursts of magic that lit sections of them up in the dark.
How were the noobs managing to get onto the walls? He looked around for Voldemort but didn't see him. No doubt he was still maging from the battlements.

27-May-2006 19:41:53 - Last edited on 27-May-2006 19:42:07 by Azure Sunday

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

A(c)zraeleterni walked up to stand in the midst of the archer ranks and turned to face the army, his prickly outfit tarnished somewhat by battle, a portion of his slayer helm dented inwards.
A(c)zraeleterni:Rangers, spread out in a semicircle about the entrance
A(c)zraeleterni:I want this place to be a slaughterhouse when they come in
A(c)zraeleterni:Mages, freeze the front lines when they are a few paces
A(c)zraeleterni:From the rangers.
A(c)zraeleterni:I want to see no other magic attacks.
A(c)zraeleterni:Melee
A(c)zraeleterni:Close in behind the noobs after they have charged into the grounds
A(c)zraeleterni:Stop their escape.
He paused.
He smiled.
A(c)zraeleterni:I think we might win this war today.
He turned back around again and was silent.
Zezima joined A(c)zraeleterni, standing alongside him amidst the bristling arrows, Kharil crossbow knocked and ready.
A(c)zraeleterni gave him a quick glance and then drew an ornately woven blowpipe from a side pocket on his (C)Dharok legs and loaded it with a dart before bringing it to his lips. Zezima stared at the man for a few seconds as A(c)zraeleterni looked dutifully ahead. Could he trust this elitist?
But before he could finish his thoughts the first of the noobs made a run at the fire, sprung through the remaining flames, and was made into a pincushion before he hit the ground on the other side.
A(c)zraeleterni:Steady, let them come closer.
But only a handful of noobs ever attempted the leap. Even after the last flames had died down, grasping hopelessly at the watchtower walls before being extinguished, the noob army stayed where it was, and when the elitists adopted a new strategy and charged out of Lumbridge courtyard, the army scattered, firing a few final arrows and basic magic attacks at the roaring elitists on their retreat back to Varrock.

27-May-2006 19:43:32 - Last edited on 27-May-2006 19:43:43 by Azure Sunday

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

55 - Tensions Grow

The outcasts hid out underground,
While Mr. Happy danced around,
They'd no idea who to attack,
Which army to stab in the back.

-Adaptation of Asd1070'* poem

Cheezit92 paced furiously about his oversized tent, fuming at Ratherdashng. It was all because of him that the noobs had been defeated at Lumbridge and were now assembled at Varrock. If Ratherdashng hadn't...hadn't...he was sure there was something Ratherdashng had done wrong but he couldn't remember it right now.
After returning to his camp from the Varrock castle yesterday, Cheezit92 had immediately held an impromptu meeting with his troops. They had to beat Ratherdashngs army, he had told them, they had to show that Cheezit92 had the better portion of the noobs. That meant strategy, and it was this topic that Cheezit92 and his army had spent hours deciding upon. Should they use stilts to gain the walls? - someone had asked. No was the answer, that had been Ratherdashngs strategy in earlier raids on Lumbridge, they needed something unique, something that would prove them the victor in the battle for the castle.
It had been decided, finally, that an elite force of Cheezit92's, no larger than a hundred, should head out to Lumbridge a few hours ahead of the others and under cover of darkness. These would construct a tunnel under the wall while the rest of Cheezit92's force joined Ratherdashng's on the march southwards and made it appear that the leaders were on good terms. This tunnel would allow for the quick passage of a large part, near two thousand soldiers, of Cheezit92's army into the courtyard while Ratherdashngs army found some other way over the outer walls. After the troops had passed under they would block the passage behind them for two reasons: To stop Ratherdashngs army from following them in, and to not give the elitists inside Lumbridge any way of escaping the grounds when the Rebels began to kill them.

27-May-2006 19:44:59

Azure Sunday

Posts: 3,757 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

Essentially, the elitists would be trapped within their own territory.
The plan had seemed to work flawlessly. The troops had run towards the wall to find the tunnel excavated and used it to enter while Ratherdashng assembled men on stilts to assault the walls and ordered his fire-headed monks to put the elitist barricade to flame. On queue, the passage beneath the wall had been refilled and the rest of Cheezit92's army had lurked around with Ratherdashng's, wondering what was happening inside the castle grounds.
But something had obviously gone wrong with his noobs in the courtyard. They hadn't come back out of the castle and Cheezit92 was beginning to think that they weren't going to.
Most of the morning he had spent reclining outside his tent, awaiting his noobs' triumphant return from Lumbridge that should have happened last night. Nothing.
Had the elitists killed off all the noobs he had sent in? No, it had been a good strategy, it should have worked. Ratherdashng must have ruined it somehow.
What had the noobs Ratherdashng had sent over the walls done? Cheezit92 had seen them go over, balancing precariously on their spindly stilts up to the wall, hardly noticeable to him in the darkness even though he had been concentrating on them. He could just see them gain the battlements and then shoot down into his noob army, laughing as their bolts rained down. Yes, that's what must have happened. He saw his own(*) noobs run up and try to cut down Ratherdashng's backstabbing archers, saw many fall before they reached the upper ramparts. Watched in his mind as it came down to the last of his noobs combating the last of Ratherdashng's and both tragically killing each other. That was what had happened. That was why there had been so many elitists behind the burning barrier in the last moments of the battle. That was why they were back in Varrock a few thousand troops fewer than before.

27-May-2006 19:45:33

Forums

-= The Revolt Lover Series =-