Aeraie: This is quite a well written story. You sacrifice some pace to a few unnecessary adjectives early in the first paragraph, but otherwise you do a great job with imagery. I like the way you focus entirely on the apple, which is executed nicely with the 1st person. You also utilise the “longer sentence, shorter sentence” technique rather smoothly which gives a lot more emphasis to the events. Good work.
Well, seeing as this is the only entry, the seventh member of the Authors is now Aeraie. Even though you win by default, this is a much deserved place – your story was very well written. Congratulations, and I’ll be in contact for the final voting round which shall begin on Wednesday.
Let the final writing round continue!
07-Aug-2011 00:06:26
