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Lucine

Lucine

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This is a leadership article I found very informative, which highlights:
7 Phrases That Will Undermine Your Leadership.


Link to the Article:

http://www.inc.com/lolly-daskal/7-fatal-phrases-that-will-undermine-your-leadership.html


If you read the article, you would have noticed there is no suggested replacements for the phrases that are to be avoided (although, there is not always going to be one), so I will provide my recommendations below, on what I think will work better instead.

Note: Please do read the article before you start reading my recommendations , because only in the article it is fully explained why these phrases are problematic to use.

So here goes:

"I'm not sure"
-
Replace with: I don't know/I don't know if/I don't know for certain
(if absolutely necessary).

"Honestly speaking"/Honestly/To be honest
-
Replace with: Nothing.
There is no need for these phrases to begin with.

"So sorry"
-
Replace with: Sorry
(I would only suggest using "so sorry" if it something significant enough to warrant it).

"Literally"
-
Replace with: Exactly (or nothing).


"Like"
-
Replace with: Such as/similar to.


"I'll try"
-
Replace with: I will do it/I will do my best
(unless you believe there a reason you won't be putting all and the best of your efforts into completing the task, using "I will try" will cause others to view you as lacking in capability).

"Do you get what I'm saying?"
-
Replace with:
There is many ways to go on about this one, but I found using
"if there is any further clarification needed, or you have anymore questions, please let me know"
to work well. It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. ~Herman Melville

20-Oct-2015 12:54:18 - Last edited on 20-Oct-2015 16:04:20 by Lucine

Lucine

Lucine

Posts: 12,636 Opal Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Who's the Article Author?


Lolly Daskal


Lolly Daskal is the founder of Lead from Within: a successful leadership firm that offers custom made programs in leadership and organizational development. She is recognized as a Top Thought Leader In Business.

She is a Leadership Coach, Consultant, Facilitator, Speaker, and Author. It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. ~Herman Melville

20-Oct-2015 12:55:57

Scret
Mar Member 2018

Scret

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Before commenting further i would first like to say about the article that all these are very unnecessary observations of an individual, while yes not using some of these things will give a good impression and i am not saying it will not help you and that you shouldnt use them but its a sad reflection on our society that people have to avoid using this because someone is unable to look beyond it and make a real evaluation about a person and what they actually have to say.

Its as if some people are so poor of a judge of character or just are unsure themselves that they need guidelines for how people are communicating with them through what words they are using when in reality it means absolutely nothing, nit picking.

I prefer to stick to what people are actually saying rather than what irrelevant habits they have in their speech.

My example will be "i'll try"

If you constantly say "ill try" and manage to do majority of things asked of you then it becomes irrelevant and on the flip side if you constantly say "i'll do it" and then you never do anything then the problem still remains the same regardless of what the person has said.
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20-Oct-2015 16:28:17 - Last edited on 20-Oct-2015 16:38:28 by Scret

Lucine

Lucine

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@Scret

I find it a good thing to enhance the way we communicate. I also don't go with "the means justify the ends" motto. In every area, there is a room for improvement, and just because something seemingly work, it doesn't mean there isn't something better than it (next practices vs best practices).

The example you put about "I will try". It is stated that there is times when it is accurate to say I will try, and there is other times where it is accurate to say "I will do my best"/I will do it. The thing is: one might be unnecessarily causing others to view them as lacking in capability (and other characteristics), when all they need to do is some adjustment in the words they use.

If one says I will do it, but doesn't, that's being dishonest or inaccurate regarding their ability to perform. If they rather used "I will try" in the instance of being ultimately unable to deliver, they would not have been seen as dishonest, and reserved some trust they may have lost due to using inaccurate wording.

Words have influence, and Leadership require adapting to human understanding, to be accurate and clear.
It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. ~Herman Melville

20-Oct-2015 16:44:52 - Last edited on 20-Oct-2015 17:00:20 by Lucine

Scret
Mar Member 2018

Scret

Posts: 25,434 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Lucine said :
@Scret

I find it a good thing to enhance the way we communicate. I also don't go with "the means justify the ends" motto. In every area, there is a room for improvement, and just because something seemingly work, it doesn't mean there isn't something better than it.

The example you put about "I will try". It is stated that there is times when it is accurate to say I will try, and there is other times where it is accurate to say "I will do my best"/I will do it. The thing is: one might be unnecessarily causing others to view them as lacking in capability (and other characteristics), when all they need to do is some adjustment of the words they use.

If one says I will do it, but doesn't, that's being dishonest, and irrelevant to the point of the article.

Words have influence, and Leadership require adapting to human understanding, to be accurate and clear.


Enhancing how we communicate is one thing but nitpicking at speech habits is another thing and in some of the examples given here in the article are really looking too much into something.

That for me is a problem, if people are too concerned about the words we are using rather than what is actually being said then that for me becomes a problem. I have worked within business environments enough to know that Business jargon is an attempt to "enhance or communication" but is complete nonsense, what people are saying vs their actions also comes into play.

In most cases the words people use because its what they have been taught to use are often meaningless and misleading and it might impress the majority but those of us who can actually see past these things understand they are most often meaningless and most things mentioned here are just habits of speech.

Im not suggesting that people dont try and reduce their habits and that the article isnt useful im just saying its a sad situation that sometimes people have to.
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20-Oct-2015 16:59:35

Scret
Mar Member 2018

Scret

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I could add to this list in runescape clan terms.

1. overuse of lol, lmao

2. To be fair/ to be honest

3. at the end of the day
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20-Oct-2015 17:05:53

Lucine

Lucine

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@Scret

Being dishonest is a whole different story. This Article helps those who want to be better consistent with their performance (actions) and words.
It offers no help to those who uses words to mislead and deceive people.


I completely agree that words are meaningless if not backed up with actions, but if there is decent and genuine actions behind the words, why don't the words also get some enhancements? Nothing is wrong with that.

You can be a genuine leader, and
you can also be a genuine and smart (or smarter) leader, without compromising your honesty.
Nothing is wrong with it. It is good and positive improvement.

Edit: I also I don't think it is that "people are too concerned about wording/nit-picking", but rather, the leader is who picks ways to enhance their style (a leader is who wrote the Article as well, if you have noticed).
The best Leaders look beyond the obvious, and are constantly seeking ways to improve their ways.


And no, I don't agree it is sad that we sometimes (or often) have to change our style for others. Non-adaptive Leadership is Leadership destined to fail.

As for the "to be honest" wording, it was added earlier as an alternative to be avoided, with "honestly speaking", but I do appreciate the suggestion. It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. ~Herman Melville

20-Oct-2015 17:15:02 - Last edited on 20-Oct-2015 17:26:04 by Lucine

Scret
Mar Member 2018

Scret

Posts: 25,434 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Lucine said :
@Scret

Being dishonest is a whole different story. This Article helps those who want to be better consistent with their performance (actions) and words.
It offers no help to those who uses words to mislead and deceive people.


I completely agree that words are meaningless if not backed up with actions, but if there is decent and genuine actions behind the words, why don't the words also get some enhancements? Nothing is wrong with that.

You can be a genuine leader,
and you can also be a genuine and smart (or smarter) leader, without compromising your honesty.
Nothing is wrong with it. It is good and positive improvement =)

Also , the "to be honest" wording was added earlier as an alternative to be avoided, with "honestly speaking", but I do appreciate the suggestion.

Yea just realised that but i was thinking of the abbreviation TBF to which i decided to expand on it then forget it had already been used, i guess what im getting at is overuse of abbreviations of these kinds of phrases.

4. i guess......
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20-Oct-2015 17:26:03 - Last edited on 20-Oct-2015 17:29:27 by Scret

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