RuneScape Forum Archive | ~The Guild of Unique Authors~

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

~~Recent News~~
16/12/2008 - Thread created!
18/12/2008 - Doom 5500 has confirmed membership.
19/12/2008 - Belladora001 has confirmed membership.
24/12/2008 - Cicobe1 has confirmed membership.
5/1/2009 - Lebraun7 has confirmed membership.
29/1/2009 - Levinski5 has confirmed membership.
23/2/2009 - Congratulations to Cicobe, Doom, Bella and Levinski for making into the final of the Jagex Changes' Contest.
20/3/2009 - Kylebooker1 has confirmed membership.
16/4/2009 - Cund8 has confirmed membership.

17-May-2009 23:10:36 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:47:33 by Cicobe1

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

~~A Guild Advert~~

*Sniff sniff*
*Sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff*
What an odd scent!

~The Guild of Unique Authors~
A relatively young guild in search for the most peculiar and strange story writers in the forum.
-Try to write something different today.
QFC:

17-May-2009 23:10:43 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:47:51 by Cicobe1

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

~~Ciao’s Reading list~~
This is my reading list. The item at the top of the list will be read/reviewed first. The order in the list is subject to change by the total of number of reward points in that item, and thus it can change any time during the week! I will only consider reading stories that have over 500 Points, so get active for your story to be read first!
500 Points --------

425 Points Death of a Stemcell
Story posts: 1
QFC and Page: 49-50-146-57931863, Page 1

425 Points The Birth of Music
Story posts: 1
QFC and Page: 49-50-146-57931863, Page 1

51 Points A New Beginning
Story posts: (1 - 20) 9
QFC and Page: 49-50-262-58717049, page 2.

20 Points ~Virtual~
Story posts: (1 - 20): 20
QFC and Page: 49-50-650-58434116 Page 2-3

0 Points ~Shades of Gray~
Story posts: (1 - 20):20
QFC and Page: 49-50-524-58486947 page 2-3

0 Points ~The Timeless Apocalypse~
Story posts: (21 – 50): 46: 20
QFC and Page: 49-50-878-58526509 , Page 2-6

0 Points Hunters vs. Prey pt. 2
Story posts: (1 - 20) 15
QFC and Page: 49-50-779-58509746. Pgs 1-3

17-May-2009 23:48:29

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

~~An Example Application~~
A COMPLETE Application should consist of 5 or 6 posts. I've taken the pain to make you an example so you'd know what one would look like:

~~Applicant Information:
Nickname (A name that would be shown in the member’s list): English
Time Zone: GMT
Is English your language (this will not lead to a more generous mark scheme, if you indicated otherwise): No.
A story that demonstrates the best of your talent: ~~The Abomination of men~~
Number of story posts on the said story above (Must be more than 20): 51
The QFC of your story: 49-50-499-57796402
Your specialties (Genre wise): Social commentary
Additional information about yourself (Things I should know about you): I write strange stories and I'm a random, singular, and a weird person

17-May-2009 23:48:37 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:49:14 by Cicobe1

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

~~The Life of a Noob~~
"Go away, you noob! I don't want you."
The very mouth once filled my heart with sweet music spoke daggers into my ears. How was this possible? A minute ago we were as close as one, now far and wide as if we were separated by an eternity – an unending ocean. A minute ago we were still comrades, fighting side by side, battling against the forces of evil goblins on the plain field by the virtuous river Lum. We were a perfect pair – for a minute. You smashed my world with a few brisk words. The ultimate rejection.
You didn't stop there; I wished you did. Did you remember what you said next? You told me I was an ignorant fool, an existence most foul, pestilent and unnatural, a tainted leech of happiness that would stop at nothing to spoil ‘your’ game. You named me a superfluous blister; a weed undesired. I was defenceless to your venomous words. You were my best friend and for a moment I even hated you; you told me how you really felt, all this time. You told me the truth, and it hurt – physically.
An unwanted epiphany.
Why must you hate me so? Was I born inferior to the culture of your own, an inferior to your standard? Did you think I was a machine without feelings? Did you think, just because we were schoolmates and I had the ‘privilege’ work until midnight to support sickly mother, that I could do without a tiny bit of human compassion and empathy? Did you think, just because I couldn’t play games all day, just because I had no time to waste, I was therefore abominable and worthless? You thought wrong! I had just as much heart as any of you. I had just as much right to be happy and be who I am – a noob.

17-May-2009 23:48:37 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:49:30 by Cicobe1

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

I sank. It was when I realised I had nothing left in the world. There was no one for me – no one cared. It was as if my identity was somehow confiscated; deprived was my right to belong. You were my best and only friend – you were my meaning of existence. I didn't expect a dagger from behind.
I logged off, crying. I couldn't bare the thought of losing you. Losing you was as if I was losing my very own self, yet, for your sake I took my leave. I was unwanted – a pest, a parasite that crawled through your daily life like an unmentionable disease. I was despicable and unimportant. Later that night, I scanned through the RuneScape forum and it was littered with popular stories of my own kind, blatantly flaming our ways – it broke my heart. What vile and spiteful texts they were! How hateful, how insulting! THIS was where they poisoned you against me! THIS was where my kind was stereotyped, exploited, and executed at the leisure of your pen –! We were powerless and we bore your insults, mutely. For what cause was this hatred, so uncalled for? Surely, you regarded us as sub-humans. You thought we were six years olds, single-minded and unintelligent. True, you were right, we had no long, pretty, pretentious words to sugar up and paint our faces to hide the devil underneath.
I was only human … a human without the right to live.
You were all I had left in the world, you know, and I couldn’t ask for more. It was all my fault and I wished I had never been born. What was life, when the very fruit it bore was sour with contempt? What was life, when its very purpose was to be denied and excluded? What was life, when each very breath that I took was but to multiply the curses on my head?

17-May-2009 23:48:38 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:49:44 by Cicobe1

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

I took the easy way out – pills. Perhaps I’ll find a friend in the next life, and perhaps one day I’ll even become more like you: more acceptable, more pleasing to the eyes. Perhaps, eventually, I will find someone, someone who cares, someone who enjoys my company – someone who will love me for who I am. Think of the possibility…
I don’t care how long that’ll take me, be it ten lives or fifty, but a hundred is too long though.
Good night.
P.S. …I forgive you.

The End.

17-May-2009 23:48:38 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:50:02 by Cicobe1

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

~~A Written Evaluation
Of course, if you can't write essays, just talk about the entry. It doesn't have to follow any essay structure, I just want to make sure you're confident to deliver what you have done to others, so you prove that you know what you’re trying to accomplish.
~~~
In my story 'The Life of a Noob', I tried to provide an insight into the mind of a Noob. This is a Noob story, yet it is far from hilarious (in fact this is rather serious). I'm pointing out that Noob stories don't have to be funny, and it was written in no rules book that they HAVE to be funny.
In my story, images of 'parasites' are used, as well as disease, which is a general view from the public regarding Noobs as the ignorant fools. I'm telling the reader that Noobs are not parasites and they also deserve to be treated like equal human beings.
The fact that the world today lacks sympathy and understanding had me writing this piece, to record the social injustice and meaningless discrimination of class and race. I'm here proving that Noobs are not 'born' Noobs, and they become who they are through no faults of their own (see the word 'unnatural').
In this story, I try to promote equality and respects for Noob as they're also human beings. I criticized other Noob stories portraying Noobs in a derogatory manner, and justify that if we view Noobs as pests, they could well view us as 'Devils' using 'pretty, pretentious words' to write these hurtful stories.
I also tried to explore the 'dual meaning' writing technique, that if you know the story inside out, the lines 'Unwanted epiphany' also has another meaning: that this story, can be, in a way an unwanted epiphany to the people who make other people's lives a misery.
This overall is an innovative approach to the Noob story genre, as I feel I have managed to approach this matter in a Noob's point of view, making a social commentary on the lack of sympathy and generosity for another.

17-May-2009 23:48:44 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:50:21 by Cicobe1

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

This is an example review I have done for my above entry. It outlines how the grading scheme will work.
A very nice story portraying the heartbreak of a new player being shunned by his friend, you managed to give an insight into the characters. This is indeed a new way of approaching a Noob story. Fascinating. Mmm...
This story, technically speaking, only has one character throughout. Although you gave the reader a deep insight into the story, and you captured the emotion very well, this feels like a soliloquy rather than a a story, or, let's say, a suicide letter. While this is powerful, I wondered at the necessity of it. You weren't very descriptive about the characters either, as you didn't give us ANY description whatsoever. I suppose, they could be anybody, because a Noob is a very generalized term, and his school-friend could be anyone too. Slight contradiction in character because this Noob IS the ignorant fool. Strange ...
Grade: G

In terms of the description, you used parasitic imagery instead of conventional adjectives.
"an existence most foul, pestilent and unnatural, a tainted leech of happiness that would stop at nothing to spoil ‘your’ game."
This is a very figurative example, and every description has its meaning like they belong to that part of the puzzle. However, there are too few of them. You've got the quality here, but not the quantity. I would like to see you concentrating more on the descriptions.
Grade: A

About the plot, it is actually very basic, yet original. It's the kind of story that doesn't seem to have a direction, to be honest, yet I can see no flaws in it, except one or two odd moments where some behaviour contradicts. I didn't really find anything disgusting about it though, so that's good. Very well thought out, again, as always.
Grade: G

17-May-2009 23:48:45 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:50:36 by Cicobe1

Cicobe1

Posts: 4,823 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile

For the Spelling and Grammar, I regret to say that this is where you hurt the most. Several words are missed out:
"The very mouth once filled my heart"
~Should have a 'that' between mouth and once.
"we were schoolmates and I had the ‘privilege’ work until midnight to support sickly mother"
~You missed out the word 'to' here.
These are just some examples of your shaky Grammar. Typos are not good, perhaps because English isn't your first language (Why then, are you called English? :p ), your grammar is shaky and at times awkward sounding.
Grade: A

I see some good vocabulary throughout, words such as 'superfluous' instead of excess, and in terms of the way you use them they're fairly accurate and nice sounding. You must've looked it up in a thesaurus ... Anyway, congratulations for using them correctly, and now, your grade...
Grade: G

Conclusion:
Well, what can I say? It's a very meaningful story, well thought out, creative, and original but overall it was needlessly over-dramatic. I didn't really like the way you assumed the reader is cruel to Noobs. This sometimes leads to misunderstanding of the story and possibly the loss of interest. Well, you deserve every grade you have and while I look at the story - it's actually quite bare and it lacks colours. However, given that other circumstances require me to do so, I have no other option but to accept you into our guild.
Welcome to The Guild of Unique Authors. Please don't be shy. Step into the spot-light and it's your time to shine

P.S. Yes, English just did a review for himself. GET OVER IT, you stupid moaners. This is an EXAMPLE of how the mark scheme works.

17-May-2009 23:48:45 - Last edited on 17-May-2009 23:51:02 by Cicobe1

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