You underestimate the power of Arkadium Von Doomian Wazerheath XIII! (brings out a giant robot) Cacophony, destroy this Calphite queen and bring me the chapter, I've some unfinished business to attend to (eerie eye gleam).
In all honesty I've been getting home really late and haven't had time to do much, the QEP is keeping me busy while online and drama is offline, not to mention the fact that my friend and I are writing a book and it's my responsibility to make everyhting hilarious :p Regardless, without furher ado I give you edits:
"a large circle stained glass window of the ceiling" should be on isntead of of
"He throws his Rune 2h Sword away and just stood in place" throws should be threw
"And I felt threaten by you" threaten should be threatened
"The darker Dante eyes fully close and he stops breathing" Dante needs an 's
"He looks over to the left and sees Spero was on the ground and Alrous kept stomping on him." the past and present tenses are mixed up, change looks to looked and sees to saw that
Not too many really :p
Also don't quote me on this but I think Kalphite is spelled with a K.
Raphael Quotes:
Ark: Wigwam! Meet my annoying but funny super-death-robot Cacophony!
Cacophony:...
Ark: Oh that's right he doesn't talk... I'll just fix that!
Cacophony: HELLO MASTER ARK. WOULD YOU LIKE A CUPCAKE?
Ark: Your an incredibly desturctive robot of death! You don't ask if people want cupcakes! And yes.
Cacophony: YOUR DEATH IS IMA...IMI...IMANORT?
Ark: Imminent. Now I remeber why I didn't give you a voicebox, you can't handle words over 7 letters. I'll just take that out...
Cacophony:...
Ark: There now go destroy them all.
Cacophony:... (The muffins are burning, I must hurry back)
Ark: Where are you going! Get back here!
We are experiencing some technical difficulties. Please stand by.
Ark: Is that... a cabbage!?
End of transmission.
25-Feb-2009 20:52:41
- Last edited on
25-Feb-2009 21:15:41
by
Ark Von Doom