RuneScape Forum Archive | ~~The Priceless~~

Englishkid62

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‘I looked after my crops properly, you see,’ Kipplin continued. 'If you don’t get anything, try again. You’ll get something in the end.’

‘Where’s the guarantee? How do you know, for certain, that I will receive anything at all?’

‘I don’t.’

‘Then why bother?’

He was silent, for a minute or two. For a moment I thought he would turn around and give me the answer to my ultimate question in life. Kipplin knew everything. Kipplin was my legend. It took him five minutes before he came up with a reply.

‘You won’t get anything if you don’t do anything,’ said Kipplin.

‘Well, some people do.’

Ignoring me, he went on, ‘I believe in the saying, “Do your best, no regret”, because you can’t get the best possible outcome if you don’t do your best.'

‘This is only a game.’

‘Yes.’ He sank into silence again. Then brightened up by an idea, he suggested, ‘But what about love? It can only grow if you spend time on it, not unlike an investment.’

‘Never experienced it.’

‘Really?’ He was astonished. ‘I think life would be meaningless without love.’

‘Why would it?’

‘Without love, we wouldn’t be here at all,’ Kipplin replied. ‘I can’t tell you how important it is. We live to love, don’t you agree?’

‘Well, I wouldn’t worry about it,’ I said casually. ‘Love is one of those things that comes to you, finds you, when the time is right.’

‘You don’t know this. You can't assume and take for granted that you will ever be loved.’ When I gave no reply, he carried on, ‘If we don’t work for it, we’ll never get it. When there is a will, there is a way. You know this saying. Nothing is impossible if you devote and persevere.’

I remained silent.

‘Or even if you do fail, you’ll still get something. I know God is merciful,’ he continued without realising I wasn’t following him anymore. ‘You know, just like the fairy tales, all virtues are rewarded.’

25-Mar-2010 23:24:56 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:21:05 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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He was not talking sanely, and I decided to throw in an awful joke, trying to bring him back to reality. ‘Don’t talk sloppy now, Kipplin, about all this love business, or I am going to think you’re in love with me!’

Pause.

Did I offend him? I was afraid I did. He took a minute to recover from the grave silence, before he spoke again.

‘No,' he replied. ‘But he is somebody you know.’

* * * * *

It was a warm summer day, many years ago, and as usual, the school yard outside was filled with joy and laughter. Some children preferred hanging around in a large group, forming large circles on the yard, on that harsh concrete, and playing silly games with each other, joining in simply out of fear of being left out. Some children preferred hanging around in a smaller group, seeking genuine soulmates and studying together in the library, consulting each other for academic knowledge, or advancement. Some children preferred to be alone, or rather, were left alone. It was not entirely a conscious decision of course, and nobody wanted to be abandoned, or cast out, on one side. But some of us were. Not everybody had the privilege of being able to fit in easily, and for the unlucky ones, they accepted their fate because this was what they were meant to be, social rejects.

25-Mar-2010 23:25:02 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:21:14 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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Alex Kipplin loved to hide himself in a dark, gloomy classroom, somewhere on the second floor, particularly at break times. He always had his hood up in school, hoping to be seen by nobody, despite his teachers repeatedly instructing him to remove it in lessons, which to his dismay only drew more attention from his classmates. He didn't want to be seen, and he didn't want to see other people, their sneers, or hear their terrible jokes. Hiding himself had been unsuccessful. Everybody knew the hoodie, and they saw him, saw clearly what he was trying to hide too. He deluded himself, that was all. Alex loved seeking solitude in a shaded classroom, where he reminded himself who he was and why he would be treated like an outcast in school, excluded from everybody, expelled from happiness. He was hated. Bullied. On this rare morning, came with the golden rays was a sensation of total liberation, touching the hearts of those who felt sunlight on their skin. There was no light in this classroom. He knew he wasn’t welcomed on the school yard, and he knew there would never be anyone in the world for him, because this was what he was – unlovable.

Alex had a habit of watching happy kids running freely on the school yard too. He wondered if he had went outside, just for once, all his despair and his world of darkness would vanish under the sun, dissolved into nothing, and he had hoped the warmth of it would melt his heart and dispel his insignificance. He was in for a big disappointment that time. He would be talked about, made fun of, pushed, assaulted behind teachers, tackled to the ground, and generally being very popular within two minutes of leaving this classroom.

25-Mar-2010 23:25:11 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:21:25 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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Every now and then Alex spotted David and his friends in the yard outside, talking or playing football. He enjoyed looking at David, particularly when he was getting hot and he pushed up his sleeves, the golden hair on his arms shimmered under the sun, and his tie would have disappeared, revealing more of his neck. When he looked at him nothing in the world mattered more. He wanted David. He wanted to be out there and talk to him. But what obligation was David under, to say anything in response? Nobody knew he was hiding in that room, and nobody wanted to know. Nobody liked to be reminded that he existed. It was by chance that David caught Alex spying on him, and to Alex’s horror he looked up and threw a frown in his direction. Alex had never been caught spying and at that moment he jumped, and retreated to the more shaded part of the classroom again, convinced that David was furious with him.

At lunchtime, Alex had given up watching other kids, and instead he played a pretty tune on a nylon guitar in a music practice room, on the ground floor. The lights were off however, and theoretically nobody would know, or even care where the beautiful music came from. When Kipplin played the guitar, every note, every beat, and every bar was tinged with the bitterest of emotions – it was despairingly romantic. Alex liked playing on the guitar. He gave the instrument his heart, his soul, which in turn spoke back, telling him how tragic his life has been, how awful others were treating him, how he should die because others said so and that life was not worth it, overrated, and how terrible it was to live in a world where nobody would show any compassion, let alone love.

He froze. He knew not what to do. He almost dropped the guitar in his hands, almost breaking it in half, when David came into the room, strangely, alone.

25-Mar-2010 23:25:20 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:21:32 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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‘What?’ he asked himself, incredulously. When David, finding the room impossibly dark and switched the lights on, Alex was in a complete panic. He was terrified to see the person he knew so well (many times an hour Alex studied his facial features and knew them off by heart) standing in front of him. David looked a little more than puzzled. At first Alex couldn’t even look him in the eyes. The room was now filled with embarrassment and unease, the intruder too proud and confident to explain his trespass, and the room occupant was afraid and did not trust his treacherous tongue. Neither of them had spoken, or moved. It was a minute before Alex, having managed to seize the tiny thread of confidence deep inside him, finally broke the silence.

‘Hi,’ he said, rather feebly.

Moments later, Alex was comfortable again. David’s eyes had put him at ease, and inspired enough trust and reassurance to dissolve his bitter view on life into nothing. His heart was still pounding loud, though his fear, at least for David, no longer existed, once he knew that David wasn’t there to hurt him. They had a proper conversation. No one has ever had a proper conversation with Alex until now.

'You should come out more, Alex,’ David suggested when the bell sounded. ‘Wanna come to my birthday party on Saturday? It will be great to see you.’

No one had ever invited Alex to a party before, namely because of his ‘twisted interest'. It was a friendly, miraculous moment of an invitation from the whole, wide world. A life stretched before him. And happiness. Kipplin was almost in tears, though he held them back, fought them, because he didn't want to embarrass himself. But the words and their impact remained, for years to come. These few words had banished the universe, the world of darkness in which Alex had known, forever.

* * * * *

25-Mar-2010 23:25:25 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:21:39 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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Then it all became clear to me that night. Kipplin loved David. Because David encouraged him when life was at its worst, and he showed Kipplin promises of acceptance and compassion that this world could bring. He remembered everything David has ever said to him, every word, and no one else’s, clinging onto them because they had a certain magical ring, therefore originated, he believed, from a sacred text. It was not clear when Kipplin finally found a purpose in life – to love David with all his heart. How else to express eternal gratitude? He knew that love alone was worth living for. To exist, just to love David, because David deserved it from the moment he walked into that room. When he was with David he was the happiest person on Earth. His eyes, sparkling with love and admiration had never left David since the day of his salvation. David was all he ever cared about.

When Kipplin started playing RuneScape, soon after the encounter in the music room, simply because he wanted a shared subject in school, David was the only person he wanted to see online. He wouldn’t have cared, if the game was played by no one but the two of them. He wouldn’t have cared either, if everyone else in the world were dead, killed by a special virus of some sort, but them. David made his life bearable, and with David in it, the world, the game, was a better place.

He never really liked the game. He played, because David, at some point in his life, loved it. The hardship of training, for hours on end, mindlessly, was a test at the end of which David would judge and watch with scrutiny. He believed David, in his own way, loved him too. He was completely convinced, with a conviction, almost as religious as those who persecuted him.

25-Mar-2010 23:26:59 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:21:47 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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He told me how he had to sneak on RuneScape because his parents disallowed any form of internet games. To them, computer games were the devil. Many times, he almost got caught and he knew that if he had been, the consequences would be disastrous. The very least would be a parental program restricting his hours of internet use, and he would never see David online again. He risked everything just to see David, to be with David. But talking to David alone, to Kipplin, was worth all the risks he could’ve taken in a millennium. David advanced quickly in RuneScape because he could go on it whenever he wanted. He never had to sneak behind his parents, or take immeasurable risks. And it wasn’t long before they felt the separation coming, as they were quickly divided by their level differences, and David’s obvious superiority.

‘Noob,’ David said in disgust after a while. RuneScape questions, in their thousands were eventually intolerable. Kipplin had heard the word before, but never directed at him, let alone from David. The word has left a large, fatal scar, forever in his heart. He tried to forget what David had said again and again, but the wound would not heal. He didn't think it could ever heal. It bled, inwardly. Eventually he reached a point where only David could stop his weeping in the evenings. Just one more word, from David, and that would have been a deliverance. He asked himself this, 'What did I do…?’ He would sit on his bed, all night, all week, miserable, cramped up in a ball, repeatedly asking himself what crime he had committed, what error he had made, to deserve this punishment.

25-Mar-2010 23:27:04 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:21:54 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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Then he figured out what it was, one day. The answer had been there all along. If he was an advanced player - experienced, rich, and had impressive skills to be admired - David would speak to him again. If David would not grant him his love, because he was unworthy at the time, he would earn it with his own two hands. He knew that if he wasn’t a noob, if he wasn’t this ignorant fool, David would love him back.

‘I was a noob and I did not deserve his love,’ Kipplin once said. But to him this was all there was to it. Deep down, David’s affection for him had not changed. It had never changed. Sometimes he blamed the game for their separation. Why play at all, be this new player, risking everything he had just to be with someone he loved, and be punished by ice barrage in Castle Wars? At heart, he felt married to David, that was all.

Perhaps David didn't know this noob would one day become the one casting the cursed ice barrage, to the dismay of other players. Perhaps he didn't know that one word was enough to alter the course of a life. Kipplin remembered vividly, the exact order of steps on the stairs that wouldn’t squeak when he, woken by his silent biological alarm, sneaked downstairs at midnight to play RuneScape undetected. He knew if he devoted all his efforts, and all his life to RuneScape, one day he could prove the world wrong. He would prove David wrong. He rejected the humiliation, that he was a noob and therefore did not deserve David. For a year or so, Kipplin devoted his sleeping hours to his desperate attempt to retain the remnants of his dream. Everyday the game, as experience increased, brought him closer to David. He cast everything aside including his coursework and his guitar practice – they were not important, not anymore. He ignored his parents’ advice and everything around him, for nothing mattered more than David. He would do anything to have David. Damn the others, damn everybody in his path.

25-Mar-2010 23:27:10 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:22:03 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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He told me he had a huge row with his parents one day, to get browser games ‘legalised’ in the household. The parents eventually gave in. By then David had left RuneScape, out of boredom perhaps, already moving on. Still, Alex carried on playing. He would never stop playing. With his new freedom with the game, he continued getting the highest possible skills on RuneScape everyday from midnight to morning, until he eventually collapsed in his final exams and failed to qualify for a place in college.

‘You don’t know how much I really love him,’ he told me. ‘I love him more than I have ever loved myself.’

And he was still intending to stay up tonight, just to meet his own target, his deadline for himself, before he was due to start again the next day, at four in the morning. It was amazing how he survived. After I absorbed his tale my initial reaction was to turn my back on him in disgust. I should have left him there, rejected him. But I have looked up to him for so long, treated him like a friend, and unknown to me, this has been his motivation to play all along. He never played the game for himself. It was not entertainment for him. Yes, there were moments when he needed quick cash and he took people to Falador, and scammed them, for which he had always felt guilty about and decided later that he should give away his things, to make amends, perhaps, to his victims. I couldn’t have left him. He sought nothing but David’s approval and love. It has been years since they last spoke.

25-Mar-2010 23:27:15 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:22:10 by Englishkid62

Englishkid62

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Kipplin was silent when he finished his tale, still feeling the wound of it all. It was a story he told, for the first time, because frankly no one wanted to know. No one cared about why he played the game, or host drop-parties. Blasphemously, I volunteered to set up a meeting for the two guys in the park nearby, hoping they would make it up. This could be done easily: I see David in college everyday. Kipplin was reluctant at first but eventually stopped objecting my proposal. I would not have it any other way. Then I saw all these years, all this hard work, and everything he has ever done was but an obvious, materialised form of the purest, sincerest, and the most genuine love.

Thinking that I have done a good deed, I happily logged off RuneScape that night and left Kipplin to his ‘Farming’. I told him to get some sleep too, because 99 farming could wait.

‘Thank you,’ I seemed to hear him say. 'Thank you for doing this.’

I managed to find David alone, wandering in the vast field of our college the next day at lunchtime, and proposed, daringly, for a walk in the park at five on Christmas Eve.

‘Why?’ he asked.

‘I need to talk.’

‘We can talk here.’

‘No, we can't,' I said. ‘I need it to be a...man to man thing, you know?’

He still didn't understand, but then I half realised I was not making any sense at all.

He chuckled at my expression. ‘Okay.’

25-Mar-2010 23:28:21 - Last edited on 11-Jan-2014 00:22:18 by Englishkid62

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