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Giant Noob

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Jacoob

Jacoob

Posts: 5,151 Rune Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
=}--- Chapter 35: Training at the Wizards Tower ---{=
Giant Noob wants to get his combat up so he looks like a better leader for his clan! He is wearing full steel and a black skimmy he got from Meri. He sees that a lvl 3 is in the tower for some reason...
Giant Noob: Um hi!
Scammer: Hey! Wanna earn 5K?
Giant Noob: OMG PLEASE!
Scammer: Well, fatty...
Giant Noob: I'm NOT fat! I'm just big boned!
Scammer: Sure you are, anyway I need you to kill a wizard please! They won't hit high, only up to 2. I promise! I'm really scared of them and i'll hide next to this door!
Giant Noob: Ok i'll own them for ya!
Scammer: Excellent!
Giant Noob gets his armour ready and hits a 1 on the wizard
Wizard: Do you noobs know anything?
Giant Noob: DIE EVIL WIZARD *hits a 2*
Wizard: Ok *uses fire strike - hits a 4*
Giant Noob: Haha! You got a lucky hit that time! *hits a 2*
Wizard: Nope *hits a 8*
Giant Noob: WTF? *gets scared and eats all of his shrimp*
Wizard: *hits another 8*
Giant Noob: Uh oh! *starts to run*
Scammer: WTF? Door can't close anymore? Um Wait Giant! Hes dieing!
Giant Noob: *turns around* really? *gets hit 4 and dies*
Scammer: THAT NOOB! Time to pick up the hot loot! OMG steel plate!
Another player comes out of nowhere...
Sealwhite1: OI! I saw that! Give back him his stuff or i'll report you for rule 2!
Scammer: And what if I don't?
Sealwhite1: I'll take you and sell you out as a noob to jagex and they'll put you in Soul Wars!
Scammer: OMG not soul wars!
Giant Noob: *crying* Wheres my stuff you stupid noob! *tryes to hit the scammer*
Scammer: Ok ok here it is, sorry man. NO please no more soul wars, i can't bare to be the loser there, no, no, no, no...*cries on the floor*
Giant noob: What did you do to him?
Sealwhite1: Um, oh where did I put my "player types of Runescape" manual..oh here it is! Yea, to tell the difference between scammers and noobs, scammers don't like being treated like noobs, and go into a fit when you call them one!
Giant Noob: Really? wow
THE END
27/27 120 skills achieved!
26/27 MoA Pets!

Completionist - 3.7b Total XP

Twitter: @Jacoob_RS

09-May-2009 02:18:21

Jacoob

Jacoob

Posts: 5,151 Rune Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
=}--- Chapter 36: The trial Part-1 ---{=
In the court room in Jagex HQ, the 5 main bad-guys are sitting in the front of the room on one side. Mega Newb is sitting on the other side.
Mod Mark H: OK let this court proceed! *uses the small mallet* So far we have evidence for rulebreaks that equal to 100 blackmarks for each of you! How do you 5 plead?
Me278: Can I have a cup-cake? L .
P-Mod 1: No, you ate most of them already!
Me278: Ok, GUILTY! Can I have one now?
Lvl 135: SHUT UP! *Tries to use ice blizzard on me278 but fails*
Mod Mark H: Nice try, but the court house is covered with anti-magic java codes designed by the creator of RS himself!
Lvl 135: You mean Gods create java codes? WOW
M.H: No stupid! Andrew created it! His scripting owns, I can't get past it!
Mod Mark H: So you're admiting to attempted system hacking of RS are you M.H?
M.H: What do you mean? *tryes to use codes to change what he said above* Darn! It won't work!
M.S: Hey Mod Mark H! If you give a graphical update to Yanille, i'll gold trim your shirt free! No strings attatched!
Mod Mark H: You really think i'm going to fall for that?
M.S: Well actually, yes
Mod Mark H: Well i'm good friends with the graphical designer so I KNOW every item and I KNOW for certain which items are trimmed or not and that ISNT TRIMMED!
M.S: So its gold trimmed trousers your after then?
Mod Mark H tries not to lose his patience.
M.P: MMH! I should go! Theres a riot waiting for me to become free! You know the saying "we pay we play" right? Well that will all stop if you let me go now
Mod Mark H: I dont negotiate with terrorists
Mega Newb: Wow I haven't said anything against you guys yet and you lot are already falling apart
M.*: SHUT UP MEGA NEWB OR I'LL PK YOU IN RS AND IRL!
Mod Mark H: OK THATS IT! YOU ALL ARE GUILTY TO THE HIGHEST DEGREE! ALL 5 OF YOU ARE GOING TO BAN-LAND! But since i'm a nice person, i'll let the jury cast their vote after the court break!
TO BE CONTINUED...
27/27 120 skills achieved!
26/27 MoA Pets!

Completionist - 3.7b Total XP

Twitter: @Jacoob_RS

09-May-2009 03:02:21

Jacoob

Jacoob

Posts: 5,151 Rune Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
=}--- Chapter 37: Pest Control ---{=
Newbie Extra have both trained up to 40 combat (yes they played a lot) and hear about this mini-game called Pest Control. Jagex has recently reverted Pest Control back to only 1 boat for everyone above lvl 40.
Newbie Extra: Wow this island is busy
L00b: My brother told me that this is where newbs become pures!
Newbie Extra: Ok lets get a boat
They both go to get a boat, that fils a bit then they get on it and the game is really bad with inexperienced players.
L00b: Wow what do we do here?
Newbie Extra: We gotta protect the void knight! WTF? Its female? How can knights be female?
Void Knight: I beg your pardon! *swings void staff to hit newbie*
Newbie Extra: Ok ok! sheesh..Lets go to the west portal its open!
L00b: I see a lot of monsters comming out! I'm scared *tryes to run the other way*
Newbie Extra: Oh come on! They wont hurt you!
A brawler comes and hits 10 on L00b!
L00b: Void girl protect me!
The Void Knight gets piled by torchers and defilers and dies..
L00b: NOO! *game ends*
High lvl 1: Those stupid noobs. Always making us lose! When we are standing in the middle killing shifters that come by occasionally!
High lvl 2: All 109+ trade me for new PC world!
L00b: Trade me!
High lvl 2: Sorry, can't allow noobs to ruin the new pc world
High lvl 3: All 109- come to my cc for free world leaks!
Newbie Extra: Sounds good *both go in cc*
*Now in PC leaks chat~
Noob 1: Whats the world?
High lvl 3: World 117 everyone!
Newbie Extra: This seems a bit odd
All the low lvls hop to W117 and see no high lvls there and start finding it hard to win games..
High lvl 3 Those noobs are so gullable
Jacob: EVERYONE NEW PC WORLD IS 121! ALL HOP THERE!
Everyone hops
L00b: Thanks Jacob, you know something, these monsters scare me
Jacob: Lol noob :P L00b: That brawler has no eyes!
Newbie EXtra: Its just pixels..Now lets play the game!
High lvl 1: OMG MY EYES MY BEAUTIFUL EYES ALL I SEE IS GREEN WHEN I RIGHT CLICK!
THE END
27/27 120 skills achieved!
26/27 MoA Pets!

Completionist - 3.7b Total XP

Twitter: @Jacoob_RS

09-May-2009 13:09:41 - Last edited on 14-Jul-2011 20:42:21 by Jacoob

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