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From page 17: Vampyro


Sakura:


Walking down the hall looking for enemies seemed pointless, but the old man definitely had his reasons just what were they. There were elves everywhere in the hallway tending to the wounded, Occasionally a drugal would fly those who couldn’t fight off castle grounds. Drugal are stronger than they look, and elves occasionally looted the corpses of human and vampires both. Usually to get back arrows, but the elves constantly need things, either to sell, or to repair their weapons.


Vyras’ worries didn’t matter though, for the only creature down the hall was a lanky hunch-backed tiny thing with grey skin, crimson eyes, bat ears, long fingers and stood a paltry 4 feet tall. Its facial features were also distinctly bat-like. It was munching on the corpses of the dead. It was a Vergas, cousins and slaves to the vampires, they are usually inept at everything they do. However, they are sometimes intelligent. This vergas was going from corpse to corpse chewing on skin and meat, and moving around skittishly from armored corpses, removing the armor to gain access to the meat beneath. Then it sniffed the air. So much for sneaking up on it, because it was facing the opposite direction from Sakura gnawing on corpse meat.


“Human scent, me smells!” The vergas said out loud in a high-pitched, scratchy voice It skimpered off and hid behind a human corpse sitting upright at the wall. “Here to denies me my food?!” it asked in outrage,
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21-Jan-2020 22:56:39

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Page 29: Vampyro

Vyrl

Desire.

Desire was what had taken over Vyrl's mind. The desire to see what his new staff could do. His ability to sense the dead around him had greatly improved. The Skull had implied that it would grant him that ability. His talents greatly enhanced, and without needing to waste his energy on maintaining the army he created, he maintained his focus on finding new bodies.

A task that was easy, as Vyrl was able to easily pinpoint where bodies were, no matter where they were in the castle. What was more was that the undead seemed to be coming to him. the resurrected corpses of other necromancers were actively leaving the one's who had raised them from their eternal slumber, and making their way to him. It was made clear when a skeleton had opened the doorway to where Vyrl was hiding. Coming in the doorway were more undead. Perhaps he could use them as bodyguards.

Even more problematic for the resistance necromancers was that their undead were now attacking their masters. Vyrl knew from his time as a novice necromancer learning the basics that experienced necromancers don't usually have their own undead turn on them. The staff seemed to be hijacking the link, somehow. Of course these are resistance fighters, they could be novices, for all he knew.

Predictably a resistance fighter went into the doorway where Vyrl lay in wait. He was a grizzled elf with short grey hair and a scar on his face. For whatever reason, Vyrl had the desire to raise his staff. The urge was strong. Very strong. Would he dare give into such an urge?
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21-Jan-2020 23:02:47

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Based on the post from last page, and the next two, What do you guys think. In looking at my previous posts, it seems that I go back and forth between styles. As if I have yet to choose a writing style that suits me best. Also, It seems in some instances, I have adopted Demi's writing style, but it goes back and forth.


What I have noticed is that the quality of my writing goes down whenever I try to be funny. My attempts at humor tend to come out awkward. So my question then becomes, do I drop the attempts at trying to be funny, and make this RP super serious? And if that is the case, do I just drop humor in all my stories, lest they come out as awkward.

Lithia. The "insane elf," Haegar the gerontophile dwarf who thinks Vyras is cute, Zurga who has the hots for Antonius for whatever reason. These people seem to make some of my posts very awkward, since I have the overwhelming desire to make something very dark, funny, when in reality it is frankly weird.
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21-Jan-2020 23:10:57

Azi Demonica

Azi Demonica

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Every turn you post makes you a bit better. After a thousand posts, you'll improve quite a bit.

Anyways, I don't think it's the humour that spoils quality, Rain. I think it's more when you rush with dialogue or character interaction, or that's the vibe I'm getting, I could be wrong, tho. Generally speaking, instead of trying to post as soon as you can, upon finishing the turn of posts, reread the posts and see if you can correlate them in some way or provide foreshadowing early for the last parts of the turn. This'll help form storytelling rather than mentioning occurrences. It also makes the RP more dynamic, too.

As for dark humour, or humour in general, you don't have to make the RP very serious. It's your project, after all, just keep doin what you like doing and you'll improve automatically.

21-Jan-2020 23:34:45 - Last edited on 21-Jan-2020 23:35:30 by Azi Demonica

Riniya

Riniya

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Reading the posts that you have presented I do see an improvement. It happens naturally as Azi said with everything that you post. You start adopting styles of other people, etc. You slowly stop including details that don't matter or don't contribute to the story.

As far as the humour goes, You just have to let it happen naturally. Don't try to force it otherwise you can tell its forced. With Roleplaying it helps if you really do try to put yourself in the mindset of the person you are portraying -- and this can be difficult as a ThreadMaster when you are in charge of the story and multiple characters (in your case specifically). You have to bounce from person to person and it can get confusing. Let the humour come as it does. -- Look at Elyssa... Her spiel with the poison antidote.. It wont be funny to her but to someone else who is reading (or looking on in the RP) it might be.
There isn't one.

22-Jan-2020 16:07:35

Azi Demonica

Azi Demonica

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I haven't yet posted since given permission to control several undead. I will try to post later tonight.

In other news, has anyone else seen this?
https://youtu.be/lz4PGLzCIOw?t=47
I nearly pissed myself I laughed so hard XD like, wtf, why are some ppl so dumb? Why are there frickin' adults older than me who act like freakin' babies? Of course, it's also he adding to it, it's not 100% real.

Speaking of Dark Souls 1, I am playing through Dark Souls Remastered with the Link mod. I record myself and then edit the highlights of my misadventures, adding extra sound effects/music/grunts from the Zelda franchise. Also did a bit of a joke in one vid as I gave quotes from the Raiders from FALLOUT 3 for the Thief in Darkroot Forest, I found it kinda funny.

Oh, and if anyone happens to be interested in my vids, I only uploaded them on unlisted in my unknown zero-view channel, so you can't actually find them without their links. I'm just having fun using editing software, something I haven't done in many years. I can share the links, but I'm not done, only have nineteen videos so far, very many more adventures to go. Once done the whole thing, was thinking of uploading them publicly to my much older YouTube account from over a decade ago, not sure if I'll remember the username or password tho XD

23-Jan-2020 00:40:49 - Last edited on 23-Jan-2020 09:21:14 by Azi Demonica

Azi Demonica

Azi Demonica

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Very good posts again in Collab.! I finished reading, will try to post the next turn tomorrow, tho.

In other news, we are now one hundred seconds to midnight in the Doomsday Clock. Although any war of that scale is unlikely, it isn't pleasant to see. I'm still unemployed, but once my security guard licence finally comes, I hope I can get a job, save money, and work on supplying myself, just in case.

Ironically--or perhaps not--Collaboration seems to be underway in quite an appropriate time!

24-Jan-2020 06:17:21

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