Level,
Thanks so much for the critique!
It is only from correction that one can grow.
--+--
Be careful when you describe massive time skips,...
--+--
I'll try and pay more attention to this.
In reviewing the material I have yet to post I find corrections to make in this exact vein. I have a bit over 28 pages in word format waiting with an anticipated 300-450 pages yet to come.
Of course that's just an estimate.
So far I've posted 12.5.
--+--
Also, I think the monk's practices could have been emphasized more, ... you want the reader visualizing the difference between the character's past, and present.
--+--
As originally written I had a good bit more detail of this sort. I had removed it for fear of boring the readers.
One thing you might like (yet to be posted) is the book referenced in the story "Orders of the Brothers of Saradomin" which I was also preparing as one of three appendices for the story.
I wish I could post the illustrations and calligraphy I also worked out for the story.
I've put a good bit of study into historic monastic orders and have tried to synthesize one based upon the "Saradomic" system incorporated in Runescape. My liberties in ascribing "virtues" and "obligations" etc. may not be appreciated by all I'm afraid.
--+--
..I think the main character should be at least having some difficulties blending in to the "monkish" way of life.
--+--
I'll work on that. =)
...And thanks for all the compliments!
I also want to point out that you should be able to notice elements of -your- dialog style (as demonstrated in your amazing "From The Ashes" Qfc: 49-50-298-60162422) being shamelessly imitated in future additions here.
=Resoun=
Thanks so much for the critique!
It is only from correction that one can grow.
--+--
Be careful when you describe massive time skips,...
--+--
I'll try and pay more attention to this.
In reviewing the material I have yet to post I find corrections to make in this exact vein. I have a bit over 28 pages in word format waiting with an anticipated 300-450 pages yet to come.
Of course that's just an estimate.
So far I've posted 12.5.
--+--
Also, I think the monk's practices could have been emphasized more, ... you want the reader visualizing the difference between the character's past, and present.
--+--
As originally written I had a good bit more detail of this sort. I had removed it for fear of boring the readers.
One thing you might like (yet to be posted) is the book referenced in the story "Orders of the Brothers of Saradomin" which I was also preparing as one of three appendices for the story.
I wish I could post the illustrations and calligraphy I also worked out for the story.
I've put a good bit of study into historic monastic orders and have tried to synthesize one based upon the "Saradomic" system incorporated in Runescape. My liberties in ascribing "virtues" and "obligations" etc. may not be appreciated by all I'm afraid.
--+--
..I think the main character should be at least having some difficulties blending in to the "monkish" way of life.
--+--
I'll work on that. =)
...And thanks for all the compliments!
I also want to point out that you should be able to notice elements of -your- dialog style (as demonstrated in your amazing "From The Ashes" Qfc: 49-50-298-60162422) being shamelessly imitated in future additions here.
=Resoun=
We must all learn to embrace our own inner newbishness
08-Jan-2010 18:03:34 - Last edited on 10-Jan-2010 03:11:24 by Resoun
