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~The Treasure of Raduon~
Quick find code: 49-50-199-54162498
Chooblet.
Mewbie.
First Post!
Mewbie.
First Post!
23-Nov-2007 19:26:38
You give no hint whatsoever of reading the story, feedback or critism, and you immediately ask to give a BIO?
Heh...
Anyways, loved the intro, now this would be a great pirate story
"Gods themselves would be drowned."
I think those are the same words, but you should take out the "BE", because it makes the sentence wierd. Be drowned? Hmm.
Anyways, loved it.
Heh...
Anyways, loved the intro, now this would be a great pirate story
"Gods themselves would be drowned."
I think those are the same words, but you should take out the "BE", because it makes the sentence wierd. Be drowned? Hmm.
Anyways, loved it.
23-Nov-2007 20:07:14
Thanks Smurf.
About the 'be drowned,' I see what you mean. However, that would make the sentence 'Gods themselves would drowned.' Now, obviously, I could make it 'Gods themselves would drown,' but that would imply everything drowning, and them with it. Okay, this is hard to explain.
About the 'be drowned,' I see what you mean. However, that would make the sentence 'Gods themselves would drowned.' Now, obviously, I could make it 'Gods themselves would drown,' but that would imply everything drowning, and them with it. Okay, this is hard to explain.
23-Nov-2007 20:10:31
No I see what you're saying, "Drowned," and "Drown,".
Hmm, maybe delete that whole thing!
Just put, "The Gods themselves would scuttle in fear," or something.
Hmm, maybe delete that whole thing!
Just put, "The Gods themselves would scuttle in fear," or something.
23-Nov-2007 20:12:51
Good beginning, I like it.
Poor pirate man...
23-Nov-2007 20:15:18
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