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Syra Valero

Syra Valero

Posts: 599 Steel Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
A.

I might steal cups of tea from east Varrok stall, then stroll to the Lumby beach crater.
There, I'd open up one of those strange collapsible chairs probably made by the Dwarves, and then sip tea while awaiting my impending doom.

When space rock comes into view, I'd look at the sky smiling like an idiotic buffoon.
This is what my friend adorning a straw hat, who I met while sailing past the Grand Line in the Eastern Lands during Ports, would probably do before facing death.

Meanwhile, my black butler hires a Famous Violinist escaping from forced kidney transplants, and another suffering from terminal illness. Miyazono then plays Fragments of Guthix while I hum it blissfully on max settings before she disintegrates into the skylight, and I perish into a wallowing ball of flames.

Just wait, Guthix. I'm coming to join you, pal.


B.

Spend 2.147 billion coins on GE to purchase a Disc of Returning, then shout free gem cutting and armour trimming until Jag, the mythical Elder Gmod—the "m" is silent—bans me.

To do so, Jag boasts a powerful crush weapon with +999 STR bonus. In an alternate Story of excessive Maple leaves, whispers from job explorers foretell the name of this equip to be, the Banhammer . In other animated tales, it's a holy weapon lent from Diane, the Serpent's Sin of Envy, to Ban, the Fox's Sin of Greed.

Those unfortunate enough to #getrekt by Jag's Banhammer are luckily sealed away—how you make sense of this juxtaposition, I don't really care. Relocating there brings each to the brink of insanity, shriveling up into wee little potatoes cabbages rocking back and forth for all eternity.

It is said, in ancient scriptures, that the earliest settlers from a Classic era of Gielinor knew a place of emptiness far greater than that of even Zaros himself. Lowlifes among those settlers were said to be banished by Elder Gmods into that deep emptiness.

This is that place. It is known as, the Black Hole.

02-Jul-2015 13:55:38 - Last edited on 28-Jul-2015 00:48:29 by Syra Valero

PrimalMoose

PrimalMoose

Posts: 4,506 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
As the first rock fell by my side, throwing the snow around the entrance to the God Wars Dungeon into the air and scattering the wolves, I knew something was amiss. I checked my gear. No scratches from the shrapnel. Good. The rocks were falling more rapidly and I knew I only had a matter of time to find safety. About to activate the magical particles of my cape to let me teleport to the Max Guild, I had a sudden thought of panic. What about the poor creatures who reside in my home? They will all be crushed!

Breaking my home tablet, I immediately entered my house to see a sight of panic. My volcano-style pet habitat was overflowing with lava and rocks had punched cow-sized holes through my roof. A shattered rock had reduced my statue of Dhamorak to dust. Another 32 weeks of grinding to rebuild that, I figured. Looking around, I could see chaos unfolding further. The Emperor Penguin was attempting to recruit a slug from one of the rocks to his cause, whilst my pet dragons were licking a molten rock as if it were ice cream. I ran to the menagerie and began shoving one pet after another into my expansive backpack. Four dragons, a penguin, a rock I'm pretty sure is my chameleon, the monkey...I ran through one by one and ticked off my beloved pets. But wait, one follower whose sole purpose was my happiness was missing. Where was little Cresbot?!

I heard a faint cry from the chapel. Running in, I saw that my gilded marble altar lay crumbled, stained glass shimmering on the ground. Little Cresbot lay on the floor, the corner of the altar pinning him to the ground and crushing his little feet into the rug. I couldn't let this happen. With a cry, I ran to its side and heaved the great chunk of marble off of him, gently picked him up and rested him in the corner of my backpack atop a finely cooked rocktail.

With all my followers safe, I leaped through the only standing portal, emerging in Lumbridge. Together, we sat in the courtyard and waited for the end...

02-Jul-2015 14:21:21

Maxi

Maxi

Posts: 36,328 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
The birds were chirping their beautiful melody on the rooftops of the subtle shops and buildings surrounding the fountain of Varrock. The running water was calm and steady as children surrounded it, laughing and running around. I stood there near the entrance of the palace, smiling.

I gazed around at the stalls, at the people and the smiles were printed on their faces at the sight of cheer. A guard nearby had removed his helmet and placed it on the head of a little girl and she was giggling while he was bowing playfully to address her imaginary royalty.

The world was calm and quiet... It was at peace.

Suddenly, there was silence.

The expressions on the people's faced instantly changed but I could not make out what was happening. I could not hear a sound as I stood there, dumbfounded at the sudden turn of events when my ears had finally translated that silence. The ground instantly shook hard and bounced me violently off the ground, only to have landed heavily on my back.

As I began re-collecting myself, I noticed the stalls around me were tipped over, the people were scrambled around the fountain picking up the now crying children. Screams and cries were heard all around as the guards had began to surround and escort the people to their homes. The stalls were abandoned and from a close distance, the banks had been emptied.

The floor beneath me vibrated violently as I noticed the descending rocks had already pierced the clouds and began crashing nearby. I heard a small cry. I turned around to find the little girl with the guard's helmet on her head, crying behind a bush. I picked her up and ran towards Aubury's Rune Shop. He heard us around his shop and immediately let us in.

The girl cried more. I looked her in the eyes.

"We will survive. I promise".

As we were teleported away, the echoes of death from Aubury's voice were heard as an enormous rock crushed him as he stood in his store.

We were doomed. Survival is our mission. Old forum user.

02-Jul-2015 14:43:26 - Last edited on 02-Jul-2015 14:43:37 by Maxi

Shallotte
Feb Member 2009

Shallotte

Posts: 261 Silver Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
I would run to the shrine of Guthix realizing that the earthquake triggered some restoration essence buried deep inside Gielinor to bring him back. I would pray to Guthix and watch as he restored balance back into the world causing all rock storms and earthquakes to cease. I would watch him pull the world back together as if it never happened and then head to the crater of Lumbridge to relax and tan in the beach chair hoping that I become a life guard within 5 hours while watching my friends collect coconuts in the hot sun. :P

02-Jul-2015 15:06:55

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