A dastardly abomination to literature would surface at the Gielinor Times HQ.
An
now
new era for goblins
On Duneday 10th Ire of Phyrris King Smegface the Runt, Leader of Saragorgak tribe defeeted
Monkfish
Monkeyback of tha goblin viladj an claymed tha ty*ul ov king of goblins. from him. Not fysicully but him tayk it offishully.
King Smegface the Runt issewd an
4
formal chaleng 2 Monkeyback Duneday aftanoon 2 fyt 4 his title. The fight last v ery long and but King Smegface is win. Both comabbetatants suffer big injury, so they is bowf restin till betta. Tha intricates ov title chang wil be wroked out at an later dayt. King Smegface woz shiv-al-russ bowt it an did no use sharp shiny big blue sword, insted optin 4 his pikaxe an bible claymin him wood mayk it fair 4 Monkeyback, but "Just this once!"
An Witnuses say "it woz a gr8 fyt, bset thems hav sin 4 a few hours!" And evry goblin hopes 4 King Smegface to fulfil promis ov grantin every1 ob hiz suporters w*v shiny gold star 4 der armour or necklays or a free goat. Adn his promis 2 take Plane of Mud back for goblin peepul.
We interviewed King Smegface a bit afta the fight when him mouth stop bleeding, an him say "It wos good fight. Saradomin and Big High War God gived me strengf to defeet Monkeyback." Is wot Smegface told us we fink. Wos difficult cuz him got no teef so him was slurring. Him's also said him's "Getting some metul teef."
Tha conorayshun wil be held at the Kyzaj arena in Yu'biusk sum tym in da fewcher. High Prophet Mudbrain wil crown him and then after der will b a
massive
mas*v huge mega fyght. All goblins (asyd Monkeyback cuz he woz noked out) wish mighty King Smegface a long and fruit full reign.
Fatnose of Na*ogoshuun,
Amachuer Jer*al ist adn writer.
PS: Can me have job w*v Gielinor Times as Goblin Corespondant?
18-Sep-2014 14:33:44
