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Alright, I'll see a doctor. But he's very hard to find sometimes.
And who wouldn't be down, if you knew that people who hated you and wanted you to die without really knowing you in fact out-number those who cared about you by THOUSANDS? I felt I have somehow earned this hatred. It's like a constant stream of people who hated you and wanted you dead.
C0s spoke highly of me? That is...unheard of. I think we had a Bible debate not so long ago. I mean, between me, C0s and Cay. Never really spoken to him since then though.
...I can't even remember what I said to you the first time...
And don't worry, I have been completely out-smarted before. Maybe because of this wider grasp of my own ignorance, and realising that there are too many things I don't know, I no longer believe I am a smart individual. By my own standard, I am not a smart person. I am just not. And I may appear so now, because I am older than you. You might say otherwise in a few years' time
If you want to meet me, the person, all you have to do is one thing. Conjure up in your mind a Chinese guy, glasses, on the other side of that screen, with his chin propped on one hand, staring into nothing. Then at last, closing his eyes, he breathed slowly out through his nose, his exhale could be felt gently against his palm. And it isn't until ten seconds later that he started breathing again because, well, he sometimes forgets to breathe when he's down.

03-Nov-2010 11:23:43 - Last edited on 03-Nov-2010 11:46:44 by Englishkid62

Awesome! I hope that you can find that guy! =D
Why on Earth would people hate you that much? And Nobody wants you dead, ok? Nobody! And if they do... they're wrong! And if some idiot starts being angry at you, send him over to talk to me. I don't care which thread, I probably won't respond to his hate, but you need the break.
Yeah, C0s did speak highly of you. From what I can remember it was about your writing abilities. I haven't talked to C0s since he stopped TNG =(
I think the first time that you did speak to me was on Cicobe1's reviewing thread. (Not sure it was Cicobe1) There was this guy who applied, but since the owner had not been on the thread for months; I told the guy that he should probably check out these other thread. I gave him several qfcs. Just then, though, one guy became angry at me for doing so. Then you agreed with him about the fact that what I had done was wrong. Then the owner came back, and he was not happy either. It was like legends falling down on me 0_0. So I went to C0s and asked him to degrade me from the Guild. But he didn't. That is why I thought you were angry at me.
Only the arrogant think they are smart. In fact the smarter you get, the more you realize how "dumb" you really are. Socrates said "The more you know, the more you realize you know nothing." The fact that you actually realized that proves that you are indeed smart =P.
Thanks for telling me that. I don't look you at you any lower even though you are asian. I really don't care. I'm a 3rd culture kid, that means that I have be born, raised, and grown up in three different cultures. One of them was Asian. In fact I lived for most of my life in Asia. =)
And please, don't forget how to breathe! That would be one of the few reasons that would make me angry at you

03-Nov-2010 14:57:09

It's not on this forum. I'm talking about a generalised hatred here that I feel coming through the screen as I read about and hear about certain American beliefs. Actually, a lot of people do want me dead, even if they don't know me. I was hated indiscriminately, you know? Well, it doesn't feel nice.
Yeah, C0s did review a story of mine 'The Abomination of men', for which he gave me a generous 97%, a score that nobody really managed to beat even now. But he refused to read any more of my stories after that though
Can't remember there was a third guy. It might have been The Guild of Unique Authors, a writing guild and Cicobe is the owner of the thread. Did you know, *I* actually created that guild? I was the founder and of course I won't be happy to see inactivity, and to make it worse, someone posting a list of rivals. Lol, that was inappropriate. Yeah, which was why I stepped in and gave Cicobe a call and all that fuss. And it was all my doing, except that I know you did it out of good intentions, so I ended the business there. I remember now. But that was the *first* time I spoke to you? That didn't seem like a promising start.
Lol, why should you look me lower if I was Asian? If you do, I'll break your neck . And what cultures were you brought up in? Where did you reside in Asia?

03-Nov-2010 17:17:05

Agreed, some of the believes are definitely out of line; but you can't let them get to you, or else they win a hold over you. You gotta fight back. Of course it's pretty easy to say it like this, sitting in front of a screen =P But really, don't even read them. Don't take the time to read their posts, or they'll get to you.
I sure hope that you and C0s come back to friendly territory (If that's even an expression ) The both of you are really cool guys.
Wow, no I didn't know that you had create a guild 0_0. Why did stop being its leader?
I totally agree with you, it was hugely inappropriate of me to do so and I apologize for it again; I just did not realized what i was doing, I thought I was helping the guy. That's why I asked C0s to judge me on the matter, cause I realized I was in the wrong. I'm not mad about the fact that you corrected me.
Lol! It certainly did not seem like a promising start! You scared me . I didn't want you to be angry at me though, that's why I begged Caydock to ask you whether you were mad at me or not. Back then (I'm not saying its not the case now) to me you were the most important dude in the whole forums. Try to imagine what it felt like for =P. My first encounter with most important guy, was me messing up pretty badly; so badly that he was (or seemed) angered at me =D.
I wouldn't look down on you, but some people out there would.
<.<
>.>
I'd rather not post about my life on the forums =P But we could talk in-game.

03-Nov-2010 21:46:37

Yeah, they still get to me sometimes, and fighting those people seems futile and a waste of time. Unless I get something published, which means I can fight on multiple fronts.
Oh, it's not that we are 'enemies'. He just decides never read my stuff again because, you know, of the subject matter, and he is rather dismissive towards it.
I was there at the planning and concept stage of the Novelists' Guild, but before that, I was already running The Guild of Unique Authors, which came out about 4 months before The Guild of Unique Authors. It used to be the place where highest quality of feedback is given because I critique every entry, pretty much for free. And each review takes 2+ hours. Then someone posted that I was ridiculously underqualified for the position. And after about April I decided to leave The Stories Forum, locking The Priceless, The Abomination of men, The Noob, and passed the guild onto Cicobe. Wanted nothing more to do with the place really.
Heh, I am a forgiving person, and to be honest, that wasn't really that grave. I scared you? Was I a scary person? . I feel hated. And you didn't try to come forward and meet me, so not taking the initiative might have forced an encounter you did not want .
But yeah, I have always found your admiration for me unfounded, as you have never read anything by me and for all you know, I could be just a fraud.
And I understand if you don't want to talk about that.

03-Nov-2010 22:07:50

Fighting them is futile, because no matter what; all that they seek are fights. They want to anger people, because if they aren't happy, aren't they don't want anyone to be.
And who was he to judge whether you were qualified or not?
I never read either The Noob or the Abomination of Men.
I wonder, since you were so fed up with the forums or Runescape in general, what made you come back? I know that the only reasons I am still staying on Runescape are Cay and you.
You yourself didn't scare me that much, the idea of you hating me did =P Well to be honest, I was still immature back then, not saying that I am not today; but I am more mature than I use to be. So I would not have looked for you, mostly for fear of you looking down on me. Plus, even if I did want to find you I really didn't know how I could've. I remember Cay saying that he himself was not on your friend list; so how on Earth could I have gotten on there? XD
My admiration is not unfounded! Most of what I know about you, Cay told me. This alone is a great reason for me to have well founded admiration. Second of all, I read two of your stories. Being the only ones still on the forums, I have read all of your posted stories. Unless you really did steal them from someone, my admiration is founded on hard solid rock! =P

03-Nov-2010 23:02:31

Speaking of which, I don't particularly like the sight of happy couples.
Lol, I will not name him. And you might just get a chance to read my remaining two major works written on this forum if Brotherly Love gets to 500 posts. What made me come back was...well, I guess I have always wanted to come back. But I didn't like all the hype and expectation so I thought I'd come back as a newbie. No pressure on writing then. It turned out that some people still vaguely remembered me. And let's just say NovelistElly introduced me to Desire & Demand and I fell in love with the story.
You're not immature, Ruben. You're alright for your age. And do I look down on people...? Actually, some , but usually those who seemed to be full of themselves. You could've posted on my threads to find me you know. And Caydock was definitely on my friends list!
Well, it certainly seemed unfounded at the time when I had nothing up on the forums, and...yeah. You have read The Priceless, Brotherly Love, and the other smaller pieces as well? Mmm...you need to be rewarded.

03-Nov-2010 23:25:12

I must I strongly disagree, happy couples are such an awesome sight!
If we were having this discussion on brotherly love, we could have given it an extra page or two =P. It's really cool that you did come back tough. I never read Desire and Demand, who wrote it? And is it worth reading?
Lol, you should know that I find that quite offensive =P. I think that the average teenager nowadays is quite immature. (Sorry everyone who is a teenager, but I am one too) So being told that i'm "Alright for my age" isn't necessarily a compliment. I'm not angry though. Lol.
I guess that I could've posted on your threads, but like I said; I would probably have been far too afraid too actually post. Even though you might not have looked down on me, I sure would have been afraid that you did.
I don't think that I have read "the other small pieces" No reward for me! YET! =D

05-Nov-2010 04:35:08

Don't tell me you died!

06-Nov-2010 14:32:08

07-Nov-2010 14:56:17