Dude nice work! I can't believe I've never read this before! The Undead Union, Scratchit's name, and the "poetic license" parts were what got me.
Roses are grey, violets are grey, I'm in Pompeii, I'm lost.
Awesome!! Thanks so much, Windshield. You are genuinely the first new reader this side of the decade! I highly appreciate you reading and taking the time to write a little comment.