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A Journey to the East

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Rondstat

Rondstat

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____________________________________

For the second time in a week, Jeh Ni ascends the steps of her childhood home, flanked by her brother and his friend. A guard steps to block their path, sword drawn.

“None may see the Khan.”

Jeh Ni quickly grasps his wrist and pulls it towards her chest, wrapping it behind her forearm and placing her sword hand in front of his now vulnerable neck. In a moment she has completely disarmed him and ensured his compliance with her own rapier.

“You will take me to my brother. This is not a negotiation.”

Young Liu starts as he sees the group approaching, hostage in tow. Shiro follows his master, fury contorting his features.

“Traitors! All counter-agents to glory of Haranu! You all will be put to the sword!”

“Jeh Ni, why have you returned? Did I not make the penalty clear? I'm afraid you force my hand.”

“We don't have time for this drivel! That fleet I warned you about is on its way to the eastern shore right now.*

*Fleet? But I thought that was-”

“I'll tell you what it is. It's our own navy. I recognized the ships instantly as the old Haranu imperial fleet. Whoever you sold these ships to is not really who they say they are. When I saw them they were anchored off the coast of the Island that Reflects the Moon. If we're lucky, they won't be here until sunrise.”

“My Khan! Surely you do not believe her lies?”

“Silence, Shiro! Sister, what can we do? How can we possibly make it through an attack of this scale? I, I'm scared.*

*We can't return fire to a force of that size. But you've got to remember, most of the artillery on those ships was decommissioned, and they don't look like they're in great shape. Whoever these people are, they're expecting an island that's unable to defend itself, and maybe, just maybe, if we can make it look like we're armed to the teeth, they'll turn tail and give us enough time to call for aid from a private fleet.*

*What do you want me to do?”

19-Mar-2015 10:13:09

Rondstat

Rondstat

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“We'll need to mobilize the entire island. Every able body has to be building battlements, digging trenches, painting logs and casks to look like cannons. We'll need you to release all the surplus guard uniforms. And your fireworks stockpile – we'll need the whole thing.”

“Khan, we need to eliminate this wench now! Guards! Kill her!”

*Don't follow that order! Jeh Ni, Haranu is at your disposal. Men, follow every order my sister gives you. And Shiro, just, just shut up. Please. Shut up.”




____________________________


Ak Haranu crouched beneath the makeshift battlement – more of a cut out than anything. He was squinting at the horizon line. The first light was beginning to creep across the shore, and it was still difficult to make out anything definite. A shout and a wave alerted him to his cue. From behind each cannon * really a hollow tree trunk coloured with soot – a firework charge went off. Villagers, armed with heavy odaiko, synchronized their booming drumbeats to the flashes of light. As the familiar ships approached, the entire shoreline was illuminated with what appeared to be cannonfire. A single shot from the invading fleet splashed weakly into the water, before the entire force laboriously tacked north until they were facing the opposite direction, and sailed off.





________________________________


The trio, flush with victory, their aims vindicated, march arm in arm to Haranu Manor. They've become the heroes Haranu needs, and now, surely, young Liu will see the error in his ways. He will recognize the manipulation of his closest adviser. He will atone for all his shortcomings, and rule the island justly. But all these aspirations are now beyond the young Khan, for he lies on the floor of his chambers, tangled in bedclothes, soaked through in his own blood. Shiro stands over his body.

19-Mar-2015 10:15:33

Rondstat

Rondstat

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For Shiro Cao had not merely been misguided. He had been the right hand of these men, these invaders, warlords like his own father. They were to seize the island, topple the Khanate, usher in the new era of prosperity that Haranu deserved. A goal that his father had tried to achieve, and whose failure had cost him his life. No longer would Har***'s people toil in poverty, no longer would they fear their neighbors.

*What makes you think you could achieve any of this? What about the seasingers, the soothsayers, the Khans?”

“Haranu has a resource that is very rare, very desirable. Many parties would like it, pay much, though it is most difficult to come by.”

*What, cherrywood? You can find that anywhere in the Scythe.”

“Ah, no, I am thinking of more human resources. Maybe subhuman resources.”

“The sea orphans.”

“Your father, ah, such a stupid man. A stupid, vindictive man. He made Haranu into a target. He made every single person on the island pay, for what? To protect these degenerate animals? How many times were we targeted by occultists looking for exotic sacrifices, hmm? How many times did we fight off purists who wanted to raze everything, all of it to the ground? How many good people lost their lives in his bloated armed guard just so these vermin could go around sleeping in the streets?”

“We could capture them, breed them, sell them to the occultists like, ah, fancy cut of meat. Or, hmm, maybe we sell them to slavers. They always need slaves in the west. And do you know how many sickos there are in Falling Blossom who want nothing, no, nothing more than to spend an evening with an oiran who's got a few extra tentacles under her kimono? This wealth belongs to the people,yes, and it belongs to me. This kingdom owes me at least this much after it took away my manhood.”

The room darkens, and Shiro is gone. In his place are half a dozen assassins, Death Lotus. The three have no choice but to fight for their lives.





____________________________

19-Mar-2015 10:16:38

Rondstat

Rondstat

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Akira, Jeh Ni, and the mercenary stumble out of Haranu Manor. They're injured, but they have survived an encounter that few have ever lived to tell about. From this position they can see clearly out to the beach, and Jeh Ni suddenly spots her first mate's distinctive yellow cloak, rowing a small boat up to shore.

Despite their injuries, the siblings sprint down the shore. The mate is helping a tall figure out of the boat, and in a moment it is clear – willowy stature, long black hair framing a white face. It is their sister, **u, and the siblings rush in for an embrace.

Something is wrong. She makes no move to embrace them. Her eyes are haunted.

“Osu, are you okay? We haven't seen you in so long. What's wrong?”

“It is long. It is very long.”

“Osu.” Ak Haranu, speaks, stifling his tears. “We call you for help with Liu, but, I am sorry. We did not do enough. Liu is gone. It was his eunuch. Shiro.”

Ak can contain himself no longer. He and Jeh Ni openly weep. But Osu is expressionless – her ears can't hear their words.

“You do not know. It is very different in Hanto. You cannot know.”

“Osu, did you hear what Aki said? It's – I'm sorry.”

“There was so much pain. So much fear. So much you cannot know here. You don't understand. All the bones that were broken. All the times I tried to resist. All the blood. All the lives.”

Ak begins to take notice of Jeh Ni's mate, standing silently to the side. “Something, something is wrong with your crew member.”

“I didn't want it. But he made me. I killed so many of them.”

“She's dead!*

*Dozens, hundreds. Until I grew stronger. Strong enough for him. You. Both of you. You abandoned me! You let him take me away! But now I've come home. I've come to claim this place for my master.”

Osu's eyes turn jet black. A pattern of arcane symbols spreads from her feet, and a dozen points of flame, burning the colour of blood, begin to dance behind her.

“ALL OF YOU! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT! AND NOW HARANU BELONGS TO US!

19-Mar-2015 10:18:42

Rondstat

Rondstat

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“No, **u!” Jeh Ni is stricken with abject terror. *She's an occultist!”

The flames begin to change, flicker. They coalesce into legs, arms, horns, claws. A dozen huge, shadowy creatures stand ready to rip Haranu into splinters.

Then, there is a cry. For the second time, the mercenary is seized with a weightless euphoria, a bond and a sentence. Maki stands at the head of the beach, arms outstretched, and her voice rings out as she's never let it before, her song sweeping over the entire island. For a moment, even the demons seem entranced by the music. And then, the ocean begins to froth. Something unfathomably gigantic casts a shadow just beneath the surface.

It rises.

A giant, draconic head, teeth like scimitars, a serpentine body glowing with azure scales. This is the power of a seasinger. The ripper demons attempt to flank the beast, pulling it inland where it will be at a disadvantage, but after only a few exchanges, the serpent easily overpowers and devours the summoned creatures. The battle is over almost before it's begun, and the creature, though injured, returns safely to the sea.

Osu has vanished. Shiro has escaped. And their brother is dead. Whatever victory the Haranu siblings have had this day is Pyrrhic at best. But there is still some hope. And there are more legitimate heirs to Haranu in one place than the island has seen in a decade. Aki knows that he lacks the will to lead his homeland in its time of greatest struggle. But Jeh Ni has come to its aid when needed most. She has spearheaded the actions that have saved Haranu from certain destruction, and with her privateer gone, she has no better place to call home. Jeh Ni, Akira convinces her, must become the new Khan.

19-Mar-2015 10:20:13

Rondstat

Rondstat

Posts: 2,770 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
The mercenary boards the junk – he's a long voyage ahead of him. Suddenly, the siren appears on the dock and, with a wordless smile, presses a ream of papers into his hands. He pores over it on the journey back * the story of Maki's communion with the great sea beast and her view into its mind. The obscure images of malevolent beings stealing its young, manipulating its eggs, twisting them into painful new iterations with primordial magic. It's a disturbing tale. But, among the last few sheets, Maki's narrative becomes more personal. She tells of the charming young adventurer who saved her life, and how much she'd like to properly thank him. The mercenary leans back in his skiff, the open ocean before him, and smiles. He makes no sound.

19-Mar-2015 10:21:17

Apple iQuest

Apple iQuest

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This was an amazing read, I can tell this isn't the first time you write. It's of very good quality and I enjoyed reading through it.

Your idea to turn this into a quest suggestion seems like a good one. The first part, which happens in the past, could be written in a book the player would find to begin the quest, though the way you implement that backstory is entirely up to you.

If you haven't written a quest suggestion before, I'd be happy to let you use or take pointers from the format I used for Call of the Sea (with the quest split into chapters, etc.)

If you do decide to create a quest out of this, I'm sure it'd be a welcome addition to the QWD, and I'd love to review it for you. The story is interesting and very different from what we've seen in RS quests so far.

I've never found myself to be a very good story writer myself, I have trouble with descriptions and the words to use, and writing dialogue is particularly difficult to me. Hence why I decided to make a quest suggestion out of Call of the Sea instead of a story. Those are generally a lot simpler to write.

I actually have been using some of my spare time for the past few years to build a fleshed-out fantasy world. Most of it's done, with the overall setting, plot and characters fully created, but I just can't seem to write it all into a story. If you're interested, I'd like it if you could find the time to help with that part.

Back on topic, though, this is a good short story and would make an excellent quest. Find a good way to mix the player character into this story, and make sure you're satisfied with your work before you post your suggestion, as it becomes hard to change things once it's on the forums (character limit and such). I actually had to go through the pain of making a whole new thread for Call of the Sea, because in the end I was far from happy with how it turned out.
My Quest Suggestions

Quest Series: Heart of the World
Quest Series: Call of the Sea

19-Mar-2015 20:52:02 - Last edited on 19-Mar-2015 20:54:22 by Apple iQuest

Apple iQuest

Apple iQuest

Posts: 914 Gold Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
To add to my last point, keep in mind simply having your story told through dialogue does not make a good quest. Be creative with puzzles, combat and new game mechanics. If necessary, add an element of choice in your quest, as the recent releases have done most of the time (the easiest way is to have the player make one big decision at the end, with different outcomes).

Think of suitable requirements and have those required quests/levels have a point in the gameplay. Finally, think of creative rewards that tie in with the story. A quest like this, seems to me, could grant full access to a small part of the eastern lands with all kinds of long-lasting benefits there.

In the end, it's all up to you, however, and I'm sure that with the creativity shown in this short story you could make an awesome suggestion.
My Quest Suggestions

Quest Series: Heart of the World
Quest Series: Call of the Sea

19-Mar-2015 20:57:51 - Last edited on 19-Mar-2015 20:58:45 by Apple iQuest

Rondstat

Rondstat

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Thank you so much! I am very flattered that you enjoyed my storytelling.

Also, thanks for giving me the ok to use the layout from your quest. Formatting is one of the most intimidating parts of making a good quest suggestion (at least to a novice like me), and that would make things a lot easier.

You've given me a lot to think of regarding how my story is told, and looking over what I've written, I've realized the opportunities for unique sequences are limited - pretty much only the skilling for building up the battle facade and a couple of fight sequences. I'll rework the 'beats' in my outline to change up how the story is told before I submit it as a quest.

I'm very surprised to hear that you've had trouble with story writing and dialogue! One of the things that immediately popped out at me from Call of the Sea was how well written the dialogue was and how distinctive a voice each character had. That and all the great callbacks. But hearing that even you have struggled with dialogue gives me more hope that I can also plug away and improve my writing, make it less expositional.

I would love to see this fantasy world. I'm very flattered that you think I can help. I'm not totally confident that my abilities are up to the task, but I'd be more than willing to try!

Thank you so much for all your constructive feedback, Apple iQuest, and taking the time to write up such a detailed response. I'm definitely going to keep all your words in mind, and put out my own quest suggestion soon!

19-Mar-2015 22:05:34

Omnis
Jan Member 2023

Omnis

Posts: 3,332 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
I posted this on the QWD but also wanted to post this here so you wouldn't miss my message.

I'm sorry for this late response, I have been busy this month and it continues to look more daunting in work load for me at school, I did read through your short story and iApple's comments and I completely agree with the assessment. Your ability to provide a descriptive and living world is shown through your writing skills and I agree that your story could easily be turned into content, but don't forget that when writing a quest suggestion you need gameplay elements as well. I hope that you develop your idea further and if you need any suggestions to writing a quest suggestion then check out the first pages of the QWD thread.
The Gorajo Quest Series:
Here

20-Mar-2015 03:42:30

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