-you are the same gender as I am.
-you require a brown bag over my head to tolerate your face.
-your weight is 10x or more your age.
-you cannot articulate a complete sentence.
-you live with your parent(s).
-your married.
-I'm married.
-you don't enjoy fine cuisine.
-you aren't open to different types of music.
-you are a broke ass.