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Advice for my friend

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Bruce Waayne
Oct Member 2023

Bruce Waayne

Posts: 4,611 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Are these people online ppl? If so simple solution is break off all communication with them. If its work you could complain to your supervisor. If its school its more problamatic, you could talk to a higher authority or own up to what their saying. Be like yeah im controlling and entitled, so what bite me even if its not true they may leave you alone after that.
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05-Feb-2023 21:51:41

Scouse
Feb Member 2018

Scouse

Posts: 29,018 Sapphire Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
1st of all...

Are by any chance a supervisor or area manager?

If so, try and leave work behind while socialising with friends and believe me, i'm not trying to belittle you in any way when i say that because i know exactly how it can be at times because of my job, most weeks i have to spend trying to explain things to people who seem to either refuse to listen or are just unable to adhere to basic tasks which usually ends up with me having to take the shit for their mistakes and that alone becomes really hard to switch off from.

But if your mates in real life have started to accuse you of this controlling and "entitled" ways, if i am completely honest tho bro, the "entitled" thing has lost me a bit lol.

Back to my legit answer mate, if your mates irl are saying this to you, listen to them bro, it's their way of giving you a chance to change and become more respectful, ignore those warning signs and you will find yourself alone which will probably end up in you treating the people you work with worse and eventually losing your job as well as your mates.

Much love

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10-Feb-2023 23:57:12

Bruce Waayne
Oct Member 2023

Bruce Waayne

Posts: 4,611 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Elion Z said :
Its just with friends outside of work. I try and tell people what to do but I think everyone does it. There's like a special tier of people who are just nice to everyone, but most people are scumbags like me
Meh drop em and get new friends.
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11-Feb-2023 01:10:59

Archaeox
Dec Member 2011

Archaeox

Posts: 53,399 Emerald Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
Elion Z said :
Fine. I admit it, I'm the friend. There is a group of people calling me controlling and entitled. What does that mean and how do I fix it. I tried gaslighting it away but it's hard when its more than 5 people.
"Controlling": It means you want everyone to do what you want, and only that.
"Entitled": It means you think everyone owes you something, and/or that you deserve more.

Fix: change your behaviour, think about what other people want.
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05-Mar-2023 09:29:49

SlR
Nov Member 2020

SlR

Posts: 4,378 Adamant Posts by user Forum Profile RuneMetrics Profile
This is generic advice but sometimes it's best not saying certain things. We regret more of what we say than what we don't say. That's not to say you shouldn't express yourself, but at the same time you don't have to give input on everything. Ironic, me saying that, since I chime in 'my 2 cent' a fair bit on the forums, lol.

I don't think we can comment on why you'd be seen as controlling or entitled since we don't know you, or what you've said / done in the past. Though I will say, if they called you that in the heat of the moment, or if alcohol was involved, don't pay it much thought.

But yeah, you'd have to elaborate a bit if you want us to break it down. Even then though, it's all just opinion at the end of the day. Controlling to one person is 'taking initiative' to another. As generic advice, if you want to be seen as less controlling then constantly seek the input of others, be considerate, open minded, etc.

PS: it shows maturity that you're looking inward / considering yourself as the potential problem. I think most people just throw a defensive wall up when they are criticised. Bob says:
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05-Mar-2023 11:19:25 - Last edited on 05-Mar-2023 11:21:00 by SlR

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