when i was 10 i first played unreal tournament and i hated the gore, it felt wrong, it wasn’t right, this was not normal. like i felt my soul telling me not to play it but i kept playing it. over time i went from being disgusted with the amount of gore to wanting more and to wanting every game to have the same amount of gore if not even more. why did this happen? i really hated it, it was do eerie and wrong but i started to love it over time. how is this possible? i wanted to leave and never play again but something wanted me to play despite me knowing that is wrong. nowadays i can see any amount of gore and it’s completely normal to me. wtf. why did my body react this way? it’s strange because usually things that scare you or that are so horrifying your brain tricks itself or it tricks you into making it normal, it makes you enjoy it. it’s like when i was forced to walk in the dark, it was frightening but the more i did it the more i started to love it. it’s as if my body adapts and learns to love things that are wrong? i think the human brain is so complex that it will use anything, any situation to make itself feel good in order to survive. same could be said for rs rofl. even when you have a job and hate it you try and find a workplace companion that you’ll be attracted to therefore work ends up being enjoyable. or if you’re in prison, or whatever. we never think if these things but brain is always thinking of a way to find enjoyment even if it’s completely immoral. i swear same could be said about a horrible car, horrible house, relationship, horrible phone, bed, etc your brain goes through some kind if traumatic transformation and tries to find enjoyment and fun out if everything. i know even when sick your brain will do anything to cheer you up. i really think that evil people could use the techniques to pretty much do mind control. you can literally program your brain to do anything. well think I found a bug in the universe literally. may Christ save us all
23-Sep-2021 11:41:00
